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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think Year 5 is a bit of a nightmare?

88 replies

WyrdByrd · 09/06/2015 20:06

DD is in Yr 5 (thank God only 6 weeks to go).

The last 8 months just seem to have been very niggly in terms of school, development, friendships in particular & general drama.

It's ringing a vague bell with me that this year group/age has a reputation for being particularly hellish and just wondered if anyone else is experiencing/has experienced the same thing & when it settles down.

Apparently their Head of Year has had words with them today because as a year group she is fed up of their constant unnecessary/OTT 'fussing' Shock Confused .

OP posts:
redskybynight · 09/06/2015 20:48

Y5 was hard for DS too. He had huge friendships fallouts and there was a lot of physical argy bargy going on. I lost track of who he was talking to at any given point.

In Y6 he is in a stable friendship group with 2 other boys and 3 girls and seems much happier and settled.

wheresthebeach · 09/06/2015 20:52

Yr 5 was hideous. Gives me the shivers thinking about it.

Yr 6 has been okay.

TeenAndTween · 09/06/2015 20:54

y5-y8 are the worst. Gets better from y9.

TheTroubleWithAngels · 09/06/2015 20:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wafflenose · 09/06/2015 20:57

I'm a teacher. I just teach music now (individuals, pairs and ensembles - mostly Junior School age) but spent a few year in the classroom before that. In my experience, the friendship issues between the girls seemed to peak in Years 4 and 5, and the boys (if they are going to do it) a year later. However, my older daughter had an awful time in Year 3, and now at the end of Year 4 things are calmer and they all seem to have grown up a bit. So it depends really... but not unusual for Year 5 to be horrible and Year 6 better.

LesleyKnopeFan · 09/06/2015 21:00

Sorry to hijack but those who had lived to tell the tale that is yr5 onwards, what advice can you give us to get through the next few years (particularly girls)? Thanks.

Original poster
WyrdByrd · 09/06/2015 21:10

YY Lesley all tips much appreciated particularly how do I look like I'm paying attention when hearing about yet another micro drama Blush

TroublewithAngels are you my DDs HoY? Grin

OP posts:
iseveryoneelsemadorisitme · 09/06/2015 21:24

I thought year 5 was bad until year 9. Secondary has been drama daily. Facebook, Instagram etc just fuels then the arguments over boys. DD and her friends are still very immature best friends one minute enemies the next, taking it in turns to be frozen out and slagged off then they "love" each other again for a day or 2 Confused

pointythings · 09/06/2015 21:26

Yr 9 has been the absolute worst for us so far, makes anything that has gone before seem a piece of cake. I think it's different depending on whether you have boys or girls though - but with girls, Yr 9 is the bitchfest from Hell.

I don't remember Yr5 being particularly bad at all - but in general I think it depends on the dynamics of the individual group as well as age.

TeenAndTween · 09/06/2015 21:30

My advice would be keep girls off social media for as long as possible. DD1 avoided a lot of the upsets by not being on facebook until she was 13.5. We had set not until 13 (the official age) and then when she turned 13 she didn't actually want it for another 6 months and she'd heard so much angst caused by it.

poorbuthappy · 09/06/2015 21:33

I'm going for no Facebook for as long as poss. I have relented on popjam but as soon as I said yes she seemed to lose all interest in it!
Will not relent on Instagram yet though.

MissPenelopeLumawoo2 · 09/06/2015 21:37

Oh yay I hear you. My hair is now much greyer and I need wine to escape the never ending friendship dramas. Did someone say another 8 weeks?Wine Wine and more Wine

Original poster
WyrdByrd · 09/06/2015 21:40

My DD is on PopJam. She's asked about Instagram & been told 'no'.

Think she knows better than to even ask about FB.

OP posts:
BabyGanoush · 09/06/2015 21:42

Funny, this thread opened a little box in my memory.

Being 10 or 11 and having fallen out with my best friend, on my birthday party.

Girls choosing sides, others were 'messengers", all LOVING the drama of it.

My mum ABSOLUTELY despairing Grin and not throwing me birthday parties after that (just 1 friend for cinema/sleepover)

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 09/06/2015 21:57

For us, years 4&5 were all over the place.
Head teacher said it was normal, and they calm down in y6.
He was right. They all seem to have muddled through 6 quite well.
Not sure i am looking forward to 7... With new school, new classes, more kids.

gaslamp · 09/06/2015 21:58

Year 6 is x 10 worse IME than year 5. Can't wait for it to end!

Do kids nowadays want facebook? DD totally disinterested - never asked. Thinks it's for oldies...Asks about Instagram though - daily.

Original poster
WyrdByrd · 09/06/2015 22:03

The only interest DD has in FB is in playing games on it tbf...

...still ain't happening.

OP posts:
ashtrayheart · 09/06/2015 22:07

I don't think they bother with FB much now tbh. That's for us old folk Grin

QueenofLouisiana · 09/06/2015 22:52

I spent ages dealing with a FB/ Instagram issue with Yr5 girls today. Lots of unpleasantness generally. I was delighted to go back to my (albeit whiffy after PE) Yr 6's after that- much calmer and less fussy.

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 09/06/2015 22:55

Dd1 had an awful Y5/Y6 loads of friend trouble/bitchiness.

Dd2 is in Y5 now and has had no problems so far.

BabyMurloc · 09/06/2015 22:58

Year 5 for a DD has been hell on earth. Even her teacher is going insane. I suspect they draw straws for who teaches year 5 as it seems to change a lot Wink

Picklesauage · 09/06/2015 23:09

Year 5 is hormonal hell. Year 6 much better! I have taught both a lot! Year 5 is just messy from bitchiness to top dog problems. Socially it is just riddled with problems. It is awful. By the time they reach christmas of year 6 (and often much earlier) they have reached a sort of understanding or peace with the problems.

Hope that helps!

Cashiernumberfive · 09/06/2015 23:44

For DDs years 5 & 6 were grim, but I think that all of the girls in those years suffered, I remember that most afternoons at pick up at least one of the girls was crying about how someone had behaved/looked at them.As pps have mentioned there is also the huge difference in attitudes (some girls thinking that they are soooooo sophisticated whilst others like to play).
Yr 9 itis, as it's known - is another circle of Dante's hell!

PistolAnnie · 10/06/2015 07:23

I hear you! My DS has really not had a good yr 5 for no definable reason.

Friendships seem to have stayed the same but he's vered between anxious and arrogant with a few hormonal tantrums too.

If I ask what the problem is with school I just get, English is morning, in science we're learning about plants and it's rubbish type reasons.

Roll on the end of term

BreadmakerFan · 10/06/2015 07:34

It wasn't so much the year they were in butnthenfactmbthat many girls are bitchy that made years 4-7 horrible for my DD. Given she went to three schools during this time it really is depressing. DD doesn't have a bitchy bone in her body and it seems that lots of the girls are unable to see that everyone is different and not everyone is obsessed with Instagram, boys, selfies ffs.