re abbreviations: "DH" isn't compulsory on MN. If he's being an arse you can just say H

[BeCool]

same for husband or wife - you can just say H or W if they don't deserve the D.

If your partner is being a total cunt, just call them P. No need to put " around the "D".

It's OK - we will all understand.

BF can be either best friend or boy friend though so it can be worth clarifying.

And a DP can't be a proper DP unless you're living together.

Although I bet you could use P and not be living together, and not be subject to indignant wrath. But you would likely be told, 'You don't seem to like him very much.'

It might get complicated. ie

H asked Ds and Ss if they wanted to go out. D1 did but D2 didn't and S1 said he couldn't as he was going out with his P.

Mmmm.

I was just going to reply to you, Sparkling, when I realised that I am being stalked around the site by an advert for a mosaic tiled bistro garden set. Most disconcerting.

DH can, of course, stand for DickHead

What have you been googling Line? I am being chased by Barbecues at the moment.

H and the Ss want one.

Sparkling, the last thing I googled was some Shakespeare. P and I thought we might go on that lottery quiz thingy*, and I thought it might take my mind off S's sodding GCSE exams.

*Tbh I think that P knows nothing about this yet.

A: "My DP is being very strange with me ..........."
B: How long have you been living with your DP?
A: Oh we don't live together, I only met him a month ago.

MN: ah ha!

DH, DP, DD and DS are fine.

But personally I hate DM and DF as they confuse me. DMIL and so on - just write MIL. DDog (although it's quite cute!)

I do find the DDog thing - also DDad, DD3's DSTBEXDP thing mildly piss-boily but not even close to textspeak for irritation value. I think QueenBean up there got it spot on. It's all so silly really isn't it - what are we doing with all the nanoseconds saved by typing DH instead of 'husband'? Is there a bank where you can store them then claim them back when you feel like an hour on your back being spoon fed ice-cream?

When I first joined MN I defiantly used OH instead of DP as both D and P made my teeth itch.

But he wasn't my OH - so I quickly knocked that on the head.

You could always write husband! DS makes me laugh as the word son is not a long word, no real need for abbreviating.

I think MN acronyms move on like any language. DH used to mean "dear husband" but now it is just a quick and clear way of saying "husband". Not sure anyone reads it as Dear anymore.

I don't read DW as 'wife' though. I always read out 'Dear Wife' in my head and think it sounds overly uxorious. Which isn't the bloke's fault.

I just had to look up uxorious - fab word.

I doubt I could ever use it in a sentence though ....

D is often dratted.

to continue the derailment
english.stackexchange.com/questions/68175/what-is-the-female-equivalent-for-uxorious

The first suggestion I read is "clingy" - I wish I could say ODFOD to whomever suggested that :)

I love the bit at the bottom of the page where it says the suggestions have been of 'low quality'!

I quite like the convention. Sorry.

I agree with pp that it's so established (all over the Internet in fact) that you don't process the original words - almost like laser or something.

That said, outside the standard few (DH, DS, DD) it gets a bit mad.

I think we don't use just H, S and D because it looks a bit bare and could be mistaken for when we say eg "I was wendied by H, and D and S haven't spoken to me since" meaning Helen, Daisy and Susie. Two letters together starting with D alerts you to a standard acronym. DDog etc is just a witty MN extension.

Typically one doesn't D- prefix inlaws because the acronym is long enough already so there's slim possibility of confusion.

Typing makes little difference on a laptop but loads of difference on a phone, by the way, particularly capitals. My phone knows DH and DC and DS and DD and therefore autocapitalises them. That saves a whole second every single time.

I don't think I've read a single post on Mumsnet where the D in DH hasn't been just a little bit sarcastic. I think you'd have to use a second adjective if you really wanted to show love or appreciation.

On another note, did take me a long time to work out the STBXH meant "soon to be ex husband". I thought it was "stupid bastard ex husband". It always seemed to fit contextually.

I'm so used to seeing it that I don't even register the DH when the DH is clearly a piece of shit. I do balk at DDog and DCat, though - illogical, given that pets give you unconditional love and so deserve the D, while husbands often don't, but it still seems strange and wrong.

I hear you re "convention".

Perhaps we need MNHQ to amend the acronym definition to "dear/darling/dickhead/donut husband/wife etc". I'd prefer that.