Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

guy came out of his house and started swearing and shouting for using a few ft of his drive to turn around

167 replies

pettywitchinlondon · 02/06/2015 14:07

Had to pop out at lunch in the car. Was to a new place, so made a wrong turn. As the road was empty I turned the car around using mostly the pavement and a few ft of someone's wide drive. Just as I was about to complete and drive away a guy thumped my car and started shouting at me for using his drive. I said sorry, but didn't even wind down the window but he saw me mouh it. Was shocked and just drove off.

Was I in the wrong? I did no damage and was barely on his drive for 10 seconds.

OP posts:
AuntOlive · 03/06/2015 09:58

Even if he was annoyed he shouldn't have verbally harassed you, and certainly not hit your car, which could gave caused damage. If he feels so strongly about it he should install gates or at least put up a sign saying keep out, no turning or similar.

CurbsideProphet · 03/06/2015 10:02

This is a weird thread. The OP drove onto a stranger's drive to turn around, rather than do a quick turn in the road, and is miffed that the person who lived there was annoyed. This must be one of those "Only In Mumsnet Land" scenarios.

Catsize · 03/06/2015 10:02

You did nohing wrong OP.

AuntOlive · 03/06/2015 10:04

But only by a few feet Curbside, it's not like she drive half a mile to some pile, looped around the ornamental pond before driving out again.

CurbsideProphet · 03/06/2015 10:13

Grin AuntOlive Grin

If it was a very narrow road then I would see the need to use the dropped curb, but otherwise it just seems unnecessary. Ah well

ApeMan · 03/06/2015 10:18

"Strangely possessive and unsharing."

Ridiculous.

I wonder if you would be strangely possessive and unsharing if he brought a packed lunch and ate it in your hallway without your permission.

Frankly, adding the way you just posted the guy's address on the web it might be a good idea to teach you about the issues you most definitely have understanding the concept of boundaries - both figuratively and literally.

ApeMan · 03/06/2015 10:19

^ the "uninvited packed lunch" is what might be a good idea, sorry without that being clear it looked a bit odd.

DoraGora · 03/06/2015 10:27

The problem with attacking random strangers who turn in your drive is that it's a different driver every time. I don't know whether or not it teaches them about drives, in general. But, I'd imagine, at the very least, it's an inefficient educational strategy, and has more to do with making the attacker feel good than anything else, really, which probably means that he needs some kind of psychological help. Some people put up a no turning notice (which can easily be ignored) or, there are the gates. Incidentally, depending on the depth of the drive, gates aren't always sufficient. Some pesky drivers still use the bit beyond the gate.

Original poster
pettywitchinlondon · 03/06/2015 10:29

Yes I do think its unfriendly and strangely possessive to have a go at a parent that has stopped a few inches on someone's drive to deal with a child puking.

Not quite the same as someone in a house eating a sarnie.

OP posts:
Teeste · 03/06/2015 10:41

We live on a cul-de-sac, narrowish road, often parked up both sides by inconsiderate residents and their visitors. Everyone has a driveway though. One resident a few doors down drives a minivan taxi thing and is forever using other people's driveways to turn round in. I wouldn't mind quite so much if his driveway wasn't completely unused with gates across it! Cheeky bugger.

So I do get 'drive rage'. I have never resorted to assaulting people's cars though!

CactusAnnie · 03/06/2015 11:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LurkingHusband · 03/06/2015 11:51

Since we're all relating odd stories ...

One of our neighbours used to park his second car across his own drive on the pavement, blocking his first car in. Just his way, I guess.

Cue a few years ago, and the house across the road from him was sold. A youngish (early 30s) couple + 2 kids moved in.

I was pottering in our garage one evening, when I heard the distinctive sound of raised voices. I discreetly had a peep, and saw the female new neighbour clearly being very aggressive towards our neighbour who was in his drive (she was on the pavement).

Apparently, he was a very selfish man for parking his car across his drive, as she needed to be able to reverse into it for, her drive, before turning around. And while personally, I would have tried not to respond, it was hard not to agree with his comment that she might consider learning to drive. The whole scene became quite unpleasant, and whilst he kept his calm, she became very abusive, making disablist comments about his health.

The whole thing escalated to the extent that both parties fitted CCTV covering the road !

Due to ill health, our neighbour has practically retired to the country, but hasn't sold his house yet. I notice with interest that he has allowed the NDN of the abusive lady to not only use his drive, but park across it as well ... interesting because I have also seen them arguing over the trees the new neighbours have planted between them - which are already making it impossible to pass on the pavement with a wheelchair or buggy.

Icimoi · 03/06/2015 12:08

The OP drove onto a stranger's drive to turn around, rather than do a quick turn in the road, and is miffed that the person who lived there was annoyed. This must be one of those "Only In Mumsnet Land" scenarios.

To be honest, my thought was that the mantra that "You can only turn round by doing a three (or five, or seven, or nine ...) point turn in the road" was an "Only on Mumsnet" scenario. Seriously, does anyone rigidly insist on doing a laborious turn in the road when they could do it more quickly and safely by using a nearby driveway? As has been pointed out, at worst it's normally a matter of the car going onto the householder's land by a few inches for a few seconds. And if you are saying it's only OK on narrow roads, the reality is that, certainly in towns and suburbs, with parking on both sides of the road the available space is usually going to be pretty narrow anyway. If it is a wide road, you have the problem that drivers tend to tank down them and don't take kindly to you obstructing them with your virtuous three point turn.

TamzinGrey · 03/06/2015 12:16

Neighbour opposite once walked across, the road, removed my wheelie bin from my drive and wheeled it out onto the pavement. He then crossed back over, got into his car, reversed it into my (now clear) drive, and drove off, leaving my bin still on the pavement.

I watched the whole scenario open mouthed from the window, too flabbergasted to go out and say something.

morage · 03/06/2015 12:23

This happens on our drive. I couldn't care less about it. I can understand people doing this rather than a 6 or 8 point turn (impossible to turn around on a 3 point turn).

Lucked · 03/06/2015 12:36

I am surprised at how many people are precious about the bottom few feet of their drive. It is more likely that your pets or children will be hit by unexpected visitors or people actually coming all the way onto your drive.

We get people take a wrong turn up our drive and then have to come all the way up to the house to turn. Meh. I just give them a wry smile and a wave, everyone makes mistakes.

meercat23 · 03/06/2015 12:59

We now have a shared access drive to our house and farm next door. There is an electronic gate to the farm. There is a clear sign both at the start of the drive and on the electronic drive saying no access for deliveries to the farm but sat nav brings drivers that way and then they drive onto our front parking area, right under our windows, to turn.

Much as I hate this I do not usually rush out to complain but I do get narked when they pull on to our parking area, park and walk through to deliver to the farm. My irritation is made much worse by the fact that we have had our cars damaged by these parking/turning vehicle at least three times and two of those the vehicle concerned just drove off.

It might seem unreasonable to get annoyed by people just parking for a few minutes or turning but the fact is that some people are just not very considerate and so it is often the latest in a long line, and probably the least offensive that gets told.

CurbsideProphet · 03/06/2015 13:04

morage what do you mean it's "impossible" to do a 3 point turn? You have to do a 3 point turn to pass your driving test....Confused

CurbsideProphet · 03/06/2015 13:09

Icimoi maybe it depends what car you have? I have a little micra and always manage a quick turn in the road, using a dropped curb if there are lots of parked cars. It's never laborious Confused

MerynFuckingTrant · 03/06/2015 13:17

I wouldn't be bothered if someone used my drive, I probably wouldn't even notice but my front garden and "driveway" (It's about the length of a large car) are very open with no fences or anything. People turn around outside my house all the time as it's not clear the road is a dead end. No idea if they come up onto the driveway or not as I don't pay attention. Odd to get that angry about it.

DoraGora · 03/06/2015 13:17

I know someone with a certain kind of Volvo, who claims that you have to circumnavigate the globe, in order to turn it. That's one pretty experienced driver. So, I'm guessing it depends on all sorts of things.

Rhiana1979 · 03/06/2015 13:34

*Funy thing is on another thread about a shag I had people want to know all the details and for me to post his pictures.

Yet here posting a link to a google map where you can see the outside of a house and some are outraged.*
----
Outraged when your link stated the poor guy's full address. I cannot fathom in what universe you would think that is ok.

Oh but then in your universe you can drive on other people's property and then get the hump when they pull you up on it.

He handled it badly but you should not have done it if you're not prepared for some people to be protective of what is theirs.

How long were you on on the drive for him to have time to come out, shout and bang on your car.

Icimoi · 03/06/2015 13:53

morage what do you mean it's "impossible" to do a 3 point turn? You have to do a 3 point turn to pass your driving test....confused

Presumably there isn't enough space in the road near morage's to do a 3 point turn.

Icimoi · 03/06/2015 13:54

Icimoi maybe it depends what car you have? I have a little micra and always manage a quick turn in the road, using a dropped curb if there are lots of parked cars. It's never laborious

Well, yes, self-evidently. Does that make it wrong for someone with a larger car in a narrow or parked-up road to use whatever means of turning is quickest and safest?

Icimoi · 03/06/2015 13:56

Oh but then in your universe you can drive on other people's property and then get the hump when they pull you up on it.

Sorry, but in any universe shouting and banging on someone's car is more than pulling a person up on something. And OP has already explained that the man was already in the driveway.