to ask what silly lies you tell to keep up appearances?

[Penfolds5]

I pretend to like films with subtitles, but in reality I find them hard to read and would go for bad dubbing/a Cameron Diaz romcom any day.

I've also been known to switch my radio from Smooth FM to Radio 4 or 6 when someone's coming over.

[NKfell]

Ooh Tallulah I can add that one too!

I fake smile a lot too because even when I'm happy or amused I don't smile naturally! I have to fake smile otherwise I look...not even miserable...I have an angry/bitchy looking face...It's just my face though!

[nellorr]

I tell people DH is from Leeds instead of castleford, I pretend it's because no one would know where castleford was, but really it's because castleford is a massive shithole full of the dregs of humanity (light-hearted).
I also pretend to like my in-laws, when in reality they're a pair of racist misogynists who make my skin crawl.
And... I pretend that I only smoke when I'm drunk, if I ever admit to smoking at all.

[TallulahFallula]

NKfell - yup. Same here. I'm actually a really happy person but my resting face doesn't reflect that at all. My mouth turns down much like the Queens does.

[Oldraver]

Non at all to 'keep up appearances'. If anything I downplay stuff about ourselves or my life.

[FeelingSmurfy]

I say I'm fine when people ask how you are because I know they really don't want to stand there for 10 minutes while I tell them all the health things I am struggling with that day

Other than that nothing really, if I like something etc then I'm not bothered who knows it or what they think. I watch Arthur the kids cartoon, I like it and it isn't doing anyone any harm so I don't see the problem?

My dad bought giant French fancy birthday cake when it first came out and the cashier asked who's birthday it was and he said nobody's we just want to try it, cashier thought he was great!

[Royalsighness]

I often listen to death rap and gangster rap in my headphones with a lot of swearing and really offensive explicit lyrics and when people ask me what I'm listening too I say a Ricky Gervais podcast or Fleetwood Mac because I don't want to look weird.

Also some of the replies on this thread in the tone of "I am what I am, I don't need to lie to anyone" good for you, so are we, we aren't lying, just evading the truth a bit.

[evelynj]

I pretend not to smoke dope a little now and then & also put a higher balance of healthier snacks out when dc have friends over rather than mostly crisps!

Also sometimes let people think that my well dressed daughter is because I drape her in such finery rather than being lucky enough to get lots of fancy hand me downs & charity shop bargains.

[FinallyHere]

My mother tells what she calls white lies all the time. Even about things that are entirely trivial, to people, complete unknowns standing in the check out queue who have no interest in what she is talking about.

Sigh

Its pretty clear that there is some low self esteem here somewhere. Reading the Daily Wail can't help, either. So I do like to own my own choices.

However, I found myself participating in a 10k run, where the water stations were run by people who were so keen to support the runners that they removed the caps from the bottles of water and then ran along side the runners to hand over the bottle, and take it back again when empty.

I had been really struggling, but found myself speeding up as i approached each water station. Sigh again.

[BathshebaDarkstone]

Oh I don't tell people what my real religion is in case they accuse me of devil worship.

[tootiredtoknow]

OK last one I can think of. I let the postman who knocks on the door every day due to the sheer amount of crap my DP buys assume that I work nights when in actual fact I work from home and don't want to be judged for doing it in my comfortable PJs. I've never specifically lied but I've never corrected his assumption.

[Fallulah]

I call out "it's here" or similar as I approach the door when pizza arrives...so that they don't think it's just for me.

[hackmum]

NoImSpartacus: "People get so emotional about meat eating, I just can't be arsed with the conflict it causes."

Me too. If someone asks me why I'm vegetarian, I always say that I don't like meat and change the subject. I really don't want to say it's for ethical reasons and then have to get into an argument about why I'm a hypocrite because I eat cheese/have shoes that are part leather etc.

I pretend that DP and I are married for an easy life.

I'm a PhD and sometimes if people assume I'm a medical doctor I go along with it - until it gets awkward, that is, and they start telling me about their bad back. Sometimes for an easy life I just drop the "Dr" and use Miss/Mrs/Ms (depending on mood).

[VacantExpression]

Hide my weird. fantastic phrase. That's exactly what I try to do about a hundred times a day when really I think people just think I'm bloody weird full stop.

I don't lie --much- but I certainly wouldn't correct a favourable assumption!

[BitOutOfPractice]

I call out "it's here" or similar as I approach the door when pizza arrives...so that they don't think it's just for me.

Fallulah I love you

[Hiddenaspie1973]

I grit my teeth when my long term mate drinks himself into oblivion whenever we all spend the night together. He can't even find the loo in our place. What's wrong with 1 or 2 beers? Why 20 plus half litre of vodka?bored now

[CumberCookie]

I used to pretend I loved reading. But I actually hate it and but pretended I loved it because I had snobby bookish friends. Now I'm truthful about it because I'm sick of even looking at books.

[hotlikeme]

I love charity shops but only admit to buying books there whereas I go hunting for designer labels.

[OnlyLovers]

I genuinely can't think of anything.

I don't think I give a fuck what people think of me.

[MillyMollyMandy78]

Fallulah - me too!!

My DH and I are both introverts. Neither of us like to socialise with colleagues/ friends etc. we are at our happiest when it is just us and the two dogs. We are think nothing of spending an entire weekend on the sofa. I subsequently find myself sometimes lying to colleagues about what we did at the weekend. I find hairdressers are the worst... I often lie when they ask me if I'm off out tonight/ got any exciting plans for the weekend. I can't stand the pitying looks i get if i tell the truth!

[Openup41]

I do not lie to keep up appearances. I know people that;
pretend to live in a more affluent neighbouring borough
Exaggerate the previous jobs they held
Exaggerate their key skills

I am careful with what I choose to share with others depending on their character.

Lying, whether white lies or deep lies is hard work as you have to keep it going no matter what.

[Baddz]

I really can't think of anything.

[Lightas]

That I enjoy yomping over hills and dales in walking gear for miles, when I would rather just potter round the shops.

[TedAndLola]

I sometimes make up stuff when colleagues ask "how was your weekend? did you do anything exciting?" at work on a Monday. Truth is I stay in my PJs all day lazing about reading, or internetting, or watching TV. I'm perfectly happy with it but I know others would feel sorry for me so I occasionally throw in something to make it seem like I have a social life

[HootsMon]

I make up stuff to tell the hairdresser - things I'm doing at the weekend, holidays I'm going on, etc. It's so much easier than the truth, which is:

hairdresser: got anything planned for the weekend?
hootsmon: no
hairdresser: going anywhere nice on holiday?
hootsmon: no

I suspect those who say they have no need to lie are the people who the rest of us are lying to, because we don't want to be judged for reading the daily mail, or heat magazine!

[TheWildRumpyPumpus]

My MIL decants own-brand washing up liquid into a Fairy bottle.