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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that if you want a light on overnight, it should be blacked out from outside?

160 replies

Gibble1 · 31/05/2015 05:01

My neighbours over the back have a really thin white blind and leave their bathroom light on all the time. It's like a thousand suns shining through our bloody rear windows. We have reasonably thick curtains but they don't block out the light.
I had to go round there before and get them to turn off their effing security lights and noticed the bathroom lights a couple of days later when I wasn't on a night shift. They were new to the house so I thought it was just an acclimatisation thing and didn't want to keep going round there complaining but the light is doing my effing head in now. I no longer work nights so it's all the bloody time and I just want to be able to sleep. It would also be nice to do some star gazing but DS's telescope got put in the loft as there is no effing point even trying to look at the sky.
Gah! Why can't people just turn off their bastard lights or put up black out blinds at every window so no lights can be seen from outside?
I'm sorry for the moan but I'm frickin knackered.

OP posts:
BathshebaDarkstone · 31/05/2015 05:07

Do they have young DC? I used to do this with my older 2 so they'd go to the loo in the night. YANBU about blacking it out though. Smile

googoodolly · 31/05/2015 05:11

Wouldn't it make sense for you to get some blackout blinds if you find it so disturbing? Confused

BathshebaDarkstone · 31/05/2015 05:12

Do they have young DC? I used to do this with my older 2 so they'd go to the loo in the night. YANBU about blacking it out though. Smile

yearofthegoat · 31/05/2015 05:16

Why don't you get black out blinds for your bedrooms if the light is bothering you? Or use those eye masks you get for travelling that cut out the light?

Security lights fair enough but your neighbours are entitled to have whichever lights they want on in their own house.

Original poster
Gibble1 · 31/05/2015 05:17

No young DC. About the same age as my DC. (11/13). Am really arsey now but I don't really care why they need to leave the light on all bloody night just block it out and have a dimmer one!

Why should I have to buy black out blinds? Their light is polluting our back gardens. It shines into my bedroom, DD's bedroom, NDN DD's bedroom it can be seen from many houses away and means nobody can see the bloody sky. Why is it that they should be able to do this?

Them having DC shouldn't trump the fact that I want to sleep at night. Besides, if I get black out blinds then I and DD get to miss out on the natural benefits of the sun coming up and waking us gradually. Bit effing selfish isn't it?

OP posts:
LongDistanceLove · 31/05/2015 05:32

How bright is this light? Can you take photos at night of how bright it is in the rooms?, and talk to them?

honeycrest · 31/05/2015 05:33

Nobody can see the sky because of a bathroom light that is shining from behind blinds? I can't imagine a light inside a house being that bright tbh.

Maybe if you explained the situation they would dim the light a bit but it is perfectly reasonable for them to leave a light on in their own home for whatever reason. I would just get heavier curtains if it bothered me that much.

Original poster
Gibble1 · 31/05/2015 05:38

It's very bright. Either several GU10 bulbs in a small white room or equivalent. It probably wouldn't be so bloody awful if the blind wasn't white. I'll try and remember to stick a photo up later. It's bright enough that I can see the outlines of things in my room though. So, I wouldn't stand on the cat or kick the door or anything.

OP posts:
Stopandlook · 31/05/2015 05:45

Tell them (nicely, when you're not so grumpy) They probably have no idea of the effect it's having.

Original poster
Gibble1 · 31/05/2015 06:02

Sigh. I'm off to try and get a bit more sleep now it's light (it's less harsh IYSWIM).

OP posts:
paxtecum · 31/05/2015 06:08

You obviously haven't got street lights near your house.

Maybe you should be living in a more isolated situation, miles from another house.

ProudAS · 31/05/2015 06:19

We have a street light in front of next door and it doesn't light up the bedroom as much as OP describes.

DH still insisted on blind though

CurlsLDN · 31/05/2015 06:25

I'm sure they don't realise how much light is getting in to your room.

Having been burgled 3 times (in a different house in a different town) I always leave a couple of lights on overnight as a security thing/out of fear. It has honestly never occurred to me that that might be bothering anyone, but I will think carefully qbout which lights in future. I'm sure if you just speak to them you could save yourself all the stress

CurlsLDN · 31/05/2015 06:25

(Ps, I'm not your neighbour!)

paxtecum · 31/05/2015 06:33

Imagine the reverse of this thread:' I've just moved and my new neighbour keeps coming round and asking me to switch my lights off.
Now we are worried about going outside in the evening and triggering the security lights in case it also triggers our NDN to complain again.
We are also using a potty the bedroom in the night because the NDN has objected to our bathroom lights being on.'

WilburIsSomePig · 31/05/2015 06:40

Why should I have to buy black out blinds? Their light is polluting our back gardens. It shines into my bedroom, DD's bedroom, NDN DD's bedroom it can be seen from many houses away and means nobody can see the bloody sky. Why is it that they should be able to do this?

They have a light on, presumably not to deliberately piss you off. How can 'nobody' see the sky, it's kinda big? I'm not sure what you can do really if they like to have a light on in their house, there could be a million reasons for it. The reason you should buy blackout blinds or curtains is because its clearly driving you nuts!

nooka · 31/05/2015 06:43

I'm very light sensitive but I can't really imagine an indoor light in another house bothering me so much. Are the houses very close together perhaps? Also are your curtains unlined? I have found that curtains bought from most shops are thin and few have linings so are a bit rubbish at keeping light out.

I really don't think that you can make them turn their bathroom light off/force them to buy different curtains etc that sounds a bit of a weird and intrusive complaint. Is where you live otherwise very dark? I don't think that you can really expect to stargaze properly in built up areas.

cakeboy · 31/05/2015 06:48

It's called living around other people. Stop complaining. If they want to have every light in their house blazing all night they can - you're not playing their electricity bill

Tapasfairy · 31/05/2015 06:49

You need blinds. You can ask them to switch it off.

We have a street light near the house, it dimmed itself they came to fix it, I was very disappointed.

OneDayWhenIGrowUp · 31/05/2015 06:53

I think YABmassivelyU. You cannot expect your neighbour to arrange the lights inside their house to suit you! If light bothers you, then get blackout blinds yourself. Agree that residential areas are rarely suitable for stargazing anyway.

If you came round and asked me this, I'd have you down as batshit crazy neighbour.

If you seriously think you have a complaint, perhaps check with environmental health that it's reasonable/valid before calmly discussing with your neighbour?

gofuckyourself · 31/05/2015 06:59

When you are not so grumpy go round and explain how you feel and they might just switch off the light or even change the bulbs for dimmer ones.
If they tell you to get lost then you will have to get black out blinds or put thicker liner on your curtains to block it out.
As for the telescope you know you can walk, drive or get the bus to somewhere that is less light polluted to look at the nights sky, it doesn't have to be at home. Seems a bit silly to have put the telescope in the loft when you can just make a bit of effort.
If all that fails move to the middle of nowhere with no neighbours for miles.

crazykat · 31/05/2015 07:10

I cant see how a bathroom light can be that bright. Even in new builds that are 3' from each other I can't see someone else's light being that annoying. I know light pollution affects what stars can be seen but unless they've got a flood light I can't see how it blocks out the stars.

We have a corner house and have two street lights shining into the house all night. I can see the bottom of the garden without turning on the outside light it's that bright. I've learned to ignore it and appreciate the security it gives.

Our bathroom light is on all night for the kids and if someone else wanted me to turn it off I'd tell them where to go tbh. You can't make someone else turn their inside light off or buy a new blind just because it annoys you. Buy a blackout blind yourself.

code · 31/05/2015 07:43

Light pollution in this country is terrible, we are uniquely lit up like a bloody Christmas tree on light pollution world maps. Not to think of all the energy waste and disturbed sleep. I sympathise, next door to us (no kids) leave their study light (no one is in there) on all the time and I never have to put a light on to find the loo as it lights up our entire house. Not to mention the frigging streetlights (although at least they get turned off at 1am now, was 12am but people complained). I miss seeing the night sky, all we get now is an orange haze.

wreckingball · 31/05/2015 08:15

I get that it's a drag, I suppose you could ask the council ( about light pollution ) if you get no joy from speaking to your neighbour but really I don't see why you don't just get your own darker curtains.
It's not your biz to know why they choose to leave the bathroom light on, there could be a thousand reasons.
Living in towns, light pollution is a problem we all live with, from street lights to shop fronts, in fact living anywhere now you'll likely have some sort of LP problem.
Get some blinds or dark curtains and stay friendly with your neighbours.

BitOutOfPractice · 31/05/2015 08:19

If you're in an urban or suburban area there is no way that one bathroom light is the single thing causing you not to be able to see the stars

I get that you're tired and grumpy op but that is just ridiculous