to be glad I can't remember being breastfed?

[retrocutie]

I just read this article in the, erm, Daily Mail. In it, a woman who is breastfeeding her 5 year-old and 2 year-old talks of her wish to still be breastfeeding when her kids are 10 years old. This makes me feel a bit uneasy. A child of 10 will remember being breastfed and I just think it is a bit yucky. Sorry. I am glad I wasn't still breastfed at that age. Some children are going through puberty at 10… I dunno, it just seems a bit, well, wrong somehow. At some point it becomes inappropriate, surely?

Not only that, but as is often the case in these families, the poor husband has been banished to the spare room so that the mother can co-sleep with the DC. Just seems a bit unfair. I feel more than a bit sorry for him.

AIBU?

I wouldn't bf an older child. I think that it's for babies, and should be phased out with all other baby things like nappies and dummies. They can grow older and let go of baby things. But, what any body else does is up to them.

gamerchick that's where you wean them and tell them no...

If babies moved from breastfeeding straight to a vegan diet with no dairy products or milk substitutes, what do you think the appropriate age to stop breastfeeding would be? Because any milk other than breastmilk is just standing in for the human-specific milk which suits us best.

And if the child is old enough to be climbing into your top asking to be breastfed then they should have been weaned along time ago as they are obviously far too old...

jasper as said before, when you wean them onto solids they are getting nutrition from solid food, hence don't have a need for Breast milk - adults seem to thrive fine with out drinking human milk . Look at other animals - cows for example when calves stop being babies they start growing up and eating grass...

Cows are born able to walk straight away. What's your point?

FWIW DD's been a thumb sucker since before birth. Never took a dummy. I couldn't give a shiny crap that she still finds it comforting at 4.5, and probably won't if she's still doing it at 6.7 or 8 either. Had she ever breastfed conventionally I might still be feeding her now as well.

Have to say I agree with spilly

Personally I find breastfeeding beyond 12 months weird. Breast milk and breastfeeding is for babies

The World Health Organization doesn't agree with you. They recommend that breastfeeding be continued with appropriate complementary foods up to 2 years of age or beyond.

I'm still breastfeeding DS2 (20 months) because he wants to continue breastfeeding and I can't see any good reason why I should stop him doing something that he continues to get nutrition and comfort from.
It's also ridiculous to compare a toddler to a 6/7/8 yr old. A normal toddler will still be doing lots of things that many people would consider babyish in a 6/7/8 yr old, because a normal toddler has only just started moving beyond the baby stage.

Incidentally, formula manufacturers make follow on milks aimed at babies and children up to 3 years old. Given that formula is, essentially, a breastmilk substitute, and designed to closely mimic human breastmilk, that's another argument for breastmilk still being appropriate for babies over 12 months old.

Good job our ancestors didn't.

Ummm...I'm not a vet but I'm pretty sure baby animals don't go from milk one day to the adult diet the next. There is a substantial period of overlap isn't there? Don't calves start eating grass quite young, just copying mum, but still feed from her for ages after that?
Cows are quite a poor example actually because we keep them in a state of near-constant lactation. I've heard at least one story of an adult bull kneeling to drink from his mothers udder to calm him down when the farmer needed to do something with him. So I'm not convinced tame/farmed animals do grow out of it so discretely at all.
In the wild, many mother-animals will stop lactating because the energy demands on the mother are too extreme vs the benefit to the offspring. Nature is full of cost vs benefit mechanisms like this that humans are not subject to and I'm not sure it's helpful to draw a comparison because extended breastfeeders are still lactating and we are not talking about undernourished women who insist their children suck from their empty breasts

I don't think cows are a good example. I'm pretty sure that if a farmer has a dairy herd, say, the calves won't get to feed from their mums as long as the calf and cow would naturally do if left to their own devices. Realistically, the farmer will be wanting to get the calves weaned as soon as possible in order to maximise the amount of cows milk he can sell for human consumption.

Hi tulips thanks for replying on the thread. I bfed my dd until age 4 just after she started school. She seemed to lose interest and I decided it was a good time to stop. Yes I used to co sleep with her too. Dh quite liked it, we did have a bonus as we bought a superking sized bed and now she has moved out it is really huge and we can sprawl.
I never told anyone as you get all the judgy people in the world judging you as if they are world renowned baby experts.

Aermingers and myneighbourtotoro2 I don't believe stating findings based on scientific facts could be construed as "accusing of people who FF of harming their children".

The health risks associated with infant formula are well known:
increased risk of diabetes (type 1 and 2), obesity, leukemia, SIDS. Non-breastfeeding mothers are also at a greater risk of ovarian and breast cancer, type 2 diabetes etc. etc.
Recent research also verifies that infants who are formula fed are on average less intelligent (IQ reduced by 5pts, irrespective of socie-economic status).

www.thelancet.com/pdfs/journals/langlo/PIIS2214-109X%2815%2970002-1.pdf

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2812877/

I'm sorry if stating research findings offends, there is no other way of putting it, I'm afraid.

As for those of you who are worried about selfish agendas or delayed development, worry not, it is not possible to breastfeed a baby or a child who does not want to breastfeed -as I'm sure many a mama with a nursing strike baby will testify, and babies/children whose attachment needs are met (bf being an easy way to meet needs), are more confident.

I only used cows as an example as cow milk was being compared to human milk. And I thought the current advice in the UK at least was that exclusive breastfeeding for the first 6 months is highly beneficial, then a further 6 months combined with weaning and solids. To be honest breastfeeding until 3 etc I wouldn't find overly offensive...but from this age you are encouraging them to develop and grow (I. E: using "big boy/girl" cups spoons etc) so feeding them actually at the Breast, to me, is in fantasising them rather than helping them grow.

*infantalising

"It's not possible to breastfeed a child who doesn't want to be breastfed"

So if we didn't teach children to use the toilet they would still be in nappies indefinitely, the same with behaviour etc. We learn skills that are taught by parents who want to see us grow and develop into well balanced adults - weaning at a reasonable age etc is part of actively teaching and guiding your child.

Wow, you do have some unreasonable hangups, spilly

Nhs says a min of 6 months then add food alongside. No upper age. The WHO and American health body recommend a minimum of 2. I am genuinely saddened to hear such an odd attitude expressed here, it is really indicative of a lack of knowledge and understanding of basic child development and biology.

I've always let my children keep doing the babyish/younger thing while providing them with opportunities to do the more grown up thing. They seem to thrive on taking steps into independence on their own initiative rather than being pushed into it. Stopping breastfeeding was no different.

And yes, a 13 month old baby would probably be ok with no milk of any sort, but human milk is the one that meets his needs best. The WHO guidelines are to breastfeed for a minimum of 2 years, introducing other foods after the first 6 months.

Unreasonable hang ups . I support breastfeeding and plan to with mine...just not until a silly age!

Are you a parent yet spilly? You won't believe how much your perceptions of what you should do will change when you do!

(I was never having DD in our room - we coslept for over a year, and still do a couple of nights a week, I was going to breastfeed but ended up exclusively expressing instead........ )

When I was pregnant with DC1, I remember thinking that 9 months of breastfeeding was plenty. She had other ideas...

Some very circular arguments always get trotted out on this subject.

You shouldn't breastfeed them past babyhood, it's weird.
Why?
Because breastfeeding is just for babies.
Why is it just for babies?
Because breastfeeding past babyhood is weird.

Anyway, must dash - I have to wrestle my 1-year-old's teddy bear out of her arms. She's had it since she was born, and now she can reach out for it and and ask for it - must be time to take it off her then!

Teddies are for babies too spilly have you decided when to confiscate those? Have you decided when you'll take them out of nappies? Decided when they should stop sitting on your lap? What about when you'll no longer read them stories?

We have a culture that has decided that bf is for young babies. We have a culture that thinks lots of things, some sensible, some foolish, most somewhere in between.

Challenge your assumptions.