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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think i wasn't in the wrong here? (traffic lights/crossing issue)

99 replies

ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 21/05/2015 23:42

Outside my kids school (not directly, its about 500 metres down the road, but its the only one with lights/green man) there is a pedestrian crossing, lights and everything, just past it, literally about 4 car lengths away is a junction, so quite often, during school run time, the traffic will be jammed.

Now i know its illegal to park/stop on a crossing, so if i cant cross the crossing completely, i will stop before it, because people can still press the button and turn the lights red to use the crossing.

Today i was in that situation, but the light was still green, i just couldnt continue on due to the traffic, cars were still coming from the other way as normal because of a green light.

Now, a mom and her kids approached the crossing, just as the traffic cleared, and as i went to move off (still green light) they decided, without pressing the button or waiting for the red light, or even seeing if i was going to let them over, to step onto the crossing and i beeped at them to warn them i was actually moving, and the mom yelled at me.

I dont feel i did anything wrong. It was my green light there was no green man or beep to tell them to cross, the crossing was only clear because its illegal to stop ON the crossing, and there was still traffic approaching from the other way.

I wouldn't nod someone to cross in that situation as i cant predict, at only 4 cars lengths, that someone isn't going to suddenly turn into the junction at full speed with a green light and potentially run someone over.

AIBU to think she was taking a risk and shouldn't have been teaching her kids its ok to step out infront of a car on a crossing when its not a red light and there is no 'green man' to tell them to cross?

OP posts:
Imnotaslimjim · 22/05/2015 14:09

FGS the pedestrian stepped out in front of the OP after she had pulled away, OP beeped her horn to warn her and she's getting short shrift?

OP, I can't see what you did wrong TBH. The woman was stupid and setting a terrible example for her DC

DoraGora · 22/05/2015 14:09

Safety is relative. But, morons who think steel boxes should go first are an issue. Luckily most drivers are perfectly decent and give and take just as anyone would at the intersection in a corridor, ie they're well mannered. But, occasionally you do get a dickwipe who thinks that having access to an engine makes them special.

fredfredgeorgejnr · 22/05/2015 14:09

Other people can do something wrong as well as you - you were wrong for sounding your horn rather than stopping. The correct response to a pedestrian in the road is to STOP, it's not to sound your horn. It's an entirely separate point about how they got there.

Stop justifying your own poor driving and rudeness (oh no you had to wait another 10seconds by stopping!) by the fact someone else made a mistake. You were wrong.

Original poster
ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 22/05/2015 14:10

i Think Dora and some of the other posters on here need to go back to Nursery and the Tufty Club to learn their green cross code!

OP posts:
Original poster
ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 22/05/2015 14:12

again fred, no i wasnt

www.gov.uk/rules-pedestrians-1-to-35/crossings-18-to-30

  1. When the road is congested, traffic on your side of the road may be forced to stop even though their lights are green. Traffic may still be moving on the other side of the road, so press the button and wait for the signal to cross.
OP posts:
RachelWatts · 22/05/2015 14:12

I think sounding your horn was correct.

What if she had assumed the green man was showing because she thought you were stopped, and ushered her children out into the other lane with faster moving traffic?

thatstoast · 22/05/2015 14:12

From how you described it, your driving was pretty much textbook. You avoided the hazard, altered her to your presence using the horn and potentially saved her from walking into free flowing traffic on the other side.

fredfredgeorgejnr · 22/05/2015 15:26

As soon as a pedestrian is in the road, you have to stop, it does not matter how they got there, you have to give way, they have priority, that's it.

They may have also done something stupid - although of course there's nothing illegal about crossing a road whenever, but by failing to stop when a pedestrian is in the road - however they got there you have failed as they have priority.

InnTheJungle · 22/05/2015 15:44

"i Think Dora and some of the other posters on here need to go back to Nursery and the Tufty Club to learn their green cross code!"

I don't see what that has to do with whether YABU. If the person crossing the road has done so poorly, it doesn't mean, for example, that you can get out and mow them down with an Uzi. Their bad decisions don't excuse your own.

InnTheJungle · 22/05/2015 15:45

"You avoided the hazard, altered her to your presence using the horn and potentially saved her from walking into free flowing traffic on the other side."

Seriously? The OP beeped her horn because the pedestrian was in her way when she wanted to move. There is no possible way the pedestrian is not aware of the traffic.

Collaborate · 22/05/2015 15:48

The HC isn't the fucking Bible.

Errrrrr. Well, actually it is when it comes to assessing how both drivers and pedestrians use the road. Or would you prefer that we didn't have any particular rules for everyone to follow? So a free for all?

Collaborate · 22/05/2015 15:55

As soon as a pedestrian is in the road, you have to stop, it does not matter how they got there, you have to give way, they have priority, that's it.

Well of course you have to stop if the alternative is mowing the ignorant fucker down. But they don't have priority to step in to the road whenever they want. All the driver is told is that when turning in to a road they must give priority to any pedestrians who are already crossing. If some fuckwit walks in to the road when there's a car coming they are responsible for the consequences, which may include:

  1. Nothing. The driver brakes in time;
  2. The driver cannot brake in time and collides with the pedestrian; or
  3. The driver swerves to avoid said fuckwit, and collides with another road user.
DoraGora · 22/05/2015 15:56

It doesn't include things like common decency, does it. If you can see someone is crossing the road, you stop and wait. It's not rocket science. On some roads there is always a car coming. The only question is how far away the car is.

Original poster
ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 22/05/2015 15:56

i did NOT beep at her because i was annoyed, because she was in my way or because i wanted her to move.

As i have said repeatedly, i beeped because she wasnt paying attention and had stepped out, without looking, into moving traffic with two small children.

Next time i wont beep and she can walk into my car or get run over by the cars coming the other way!

OP posts:
LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 22/05/2015 15:58

I don't know, I always follow the 'Squishier than me' principle. The squishier of the two should always have 'right of way'.

Does it really matter who is right and who is wrong? Avoiding squishies, that's where the smart money is (and sleep-ful nights).

DoraGora · 22/05/2015 15:59

Well, sure. If motorists think that a pedestrian on a road is a fuckwit, then all we can do is go to war with each other. I'll be arming myself from now on.

Original poster
ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 22/05/2015 15:59

Dora are you missing that this wasnt a single track road?

It moves both ways, my side was stopped because of the junction, the other was not.

It wasnt just a matter of me stopping, it was a matter of there also being traffic coming the other way!!

Are you suggesting i should have stopped and then just let her walk straight in front of my car and straight into the path of the oncoming traffic?

OP posts:
thatstoast · 22/05/2015 16:00

Seriously? The OP beeped her horn because the pedestrian was in her way when she wanted to move. There is no possible way the pedestrian is not aware of the traffic.

The op was already moving, as was the traffic on the other side of the road. You think the pedestrian was fully aware and she wanted to put herself and her children in the path of moving cars?

Pedestrians have right of way but that doesn't mean they should walk out into the road whenever they want.

amicissimma · 22/05/2015 16:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TedAndLola · 22/05/2015 16:04

but the OP stopped because there was no room for her to move off the crossing if the green man came up.

Yes, but by stopping it gives the impression to pedestrians that you are allowing them to cross. Drivers need to be mindful of this and act defensively.

DoraGora · 22/05/2015 16:05

The use of the entire road is conditional. (Unfortunately, it's just not conditional on being a decent human being).

Original poster
ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 22/05/2015 16:07

Er nope, pedestrians need to be aware of this rule in the HC!

www.gov.uk/rules-pedestrians-1-to-35/crossings-18-to-30

  1. When the road is congested, traffic on your side of the road may be forced to stop even though their lights are green. Traffic may still be moving on the other side of the road, so press the button and wait for the signal to cross.
OP posts:
Original poster
ASorcererIsAWizardSquared · 22/05/2015 16:09

Honestly, if you people are teaching your children that its ok to walk onto a pedestrian crossing without pressing the button and waiting for the green man or signal to cross, you are clearly failing your children.

I dont give a shit if the driver stops and tells me i can cross, my children are NEVER EVER permitted to step onto a crossing unless the green man or signal to cross is showing.

OP posts:
Collaborate · 22/05/2015 16:12

Green means you may go on if the way is clear. Take special care if you intend to turn left or right and give way to pedestrians who are crossing.*

The give way to pedestrians crossing is reference to those pedestrians already crossing the road you're turning left or right in to.

Of course all drivers should be driving at such a speed that they have time to react. They must take reasonable steps to brake.

TedAndLola · 22/05/2015 16:15

Honestly, if you people are teaching your children that its ok to walk onto a pedestrian crossing without pressing the button and waiting for the green man or signal to cross, you are clearly failing your children.

That's true but it doesn't absolve drivers of their responsibility either. Some pedestrians are stupid. Most pedestrians do not know the Highway Code well. Some lack all common sense. When you're in charge of a metal box weighing a tonne, you need to anticipate people being idiots and take action to avoid hurting them. It is NOT unexpected for pedestrians to walk out on clear crossings without looking properly, and every good driver needs to be wary of it.

In this situation, where traffic was still on the OP's side and she had deliberately stopped at the edge of a crossing, I'm surprised she didn't expect someone to walk out. I would have.