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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not give my daughter the antibiotics?

58 replies

singlikethepianoMargot · 20/05/2015 09:38

4yr old daughter complaining of soreness when weeing. Went to doc, checked urine sample, anti b's given. Gave them to DD, 5 days later no problems.

Just had a call from the doctor saying the sample had been sent to the lab and the type of infection DD has is resistant to the type of anti b we were prescribed and there is a new prescription waiting for us.

Daughter appears to have no symptoms anymore.

When I have a touch of cystitis or possible UTI I just drink loads of water and let it sort itself out, I am reluctant to take too many antibiotics. So I am thinking I don't need to give dd the new medicine as she doesn't appear in pain anymore.

But I'm interested if there is something I am missing or a reason I should give her the anti biotics, could she still have the infection if she has no symptoms? Should I get the medicine in case the symptoms come back?

Thanks!

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 20/05/2015 10:29

I think she'd be wise to trust in those who are medically qualified before randoms on the Internet in future, murphy. I don't know "everything" myself; but I know who to seek medical advice from...

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 10:32

why have people started posting in this forum for medical advice? sorry, but this is the health of your four year old daughter- why are you canvassing the opinion of untrained randoms? GO TALK TO A DOCTOR!

DottyStripes · 20/05/2015 10:42

How rediculous, tons of doctors have differing opinions. There's no law that you must do what one Dr says.

It's absolutely fine to get opinions, and ask a qualified medical professional for second opinions if you don't feel quite at ease with the first.

But then I speak as someone who had several organs removed based on a wrong diagnosis, when all along I suspected I had another condition and had I pushed for a second opinion and a few more tests - I wouldn't have lifelong problems as a result of missing those organs to put up with.

If only I had asked for a few opinions!

Floggingmolly · 20/05/2015 11:12

But you ask for a second medical opinion, surely, if you're in any doubt?

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:20

God good, I'm not saying don't get a second (or third or whatever) opinion from a qualified medical professional. I'm saying don't get a second opinion from randoms on the internet!

ScarlettDarling · 20/05/2015 11:26

Why does everything here have to turn into a bunfight?! It's ridiculous!

Op, I'd take a new urine sample in for testing and hold off with the antibs until the results are back. Of course if your dd starts showing any symptoms in the meantime while waiting for results, then start the antibs straight away.

Urine infections can clear up without antibiotics and if there is no infection then why give your child a needless lot of medicine?

DottyStripes · 20/05/2015 11:26

Yes, but is it any different to asking your mum or a friend who pops round for coffee what they think about it?

If that's what it takes for you to gather the confidence to go and request a second medical opinion, why not ask here?

The Medical professionals are the authority on medicines - it can be fairly stressful for some people to question their advice, some people don't even realise they can have a second opinion or worry they'll be wasting time and resources to do so etc

SoupDragon · 20/05/2015 11:29

FFS She is phoning the bloody doctor!!

been trying to get through to doc with no luck so far

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:31

There's a world of difference between discussing treatment with non-qualified people and them giving you ideas of questions to ask a doctor
and asking non-qualified people whether or not the treatment prescribed should be administered. The OP was asking whether or not to give antibiotics to her little girl. No doctor would give an answer to that question on the information given in the post, but non-qualified people are happy to pile in and give an answer.

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:32

Yes I saw that SoupDragon - the fact that you can't get through to the doctor does not make it right to substitute the opinion of unqualified people!

DottyStripes · 20/05/2015 11:35

Yes but that's exactly what's happened - she's discussed it with non medical people, who've then directed her to ask for another opinion before deciding not to give them.

It's a bit safer to get a broader spectrum of opinions than just say your mum for instance who could have said "no OP don't bother giving them" and left it at that. Here she's had varying responses and some reassurance I hope that it's ok to ask further, I just feel it's very sad when people get flamed for daring to question if advice they've been given is correct

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:38

Yes but what if the advice they receive is not correct? Sorry, I just don't think this is an appropriate forum for this kind of question. I think it's extremely dangerous.

Floggingmolly · 20/05/2015 11:42

It's not safer at all to get a broader spectrum of opinions on medical matters from non medically qualified people, Dotty, how could it be?
Op posted asking would it be unreasonable to not give prescribed antibiotics to her child; are we to assume she would have gone with the majority vote?
Even if it was "you know your own child, hun. Your bubz your rules"?

DottyStripes · 20/05/2015 11:46

Well what is the right forum?

Her mum? Her sister? Her neighbor?

I think it's fine for her to wonder and post on MN while trying to get through to the dr.

If a friend asked someone the same thing they wouldn't attack her for asking and tell her how irresponsible it is to ask their opinion. And it would be far easier for one person to give an unbalanced incorrect answer than multiple people on what started as a supportive forum

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:50

I also think this is the kind of question that is not appropriate to ask random people in real life. If someone irl asked me whether or not she should give some prescription drugs to her child my answer would be the same: I have no idea, I am not qualified and am not the right person to ask. Consult a doctor.

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:50

Exactly, floggingmolly!

DottyStripes · 20/05/2015 11:52

Seriously? Your bubz, your rules?
How likely was that?

She's not posting on some Tweenager site, she's posting where the main audience are parents

Yes there will always be some bridge dwelling types and those who are just here for comedy but the majority combined are usually fairly sensible

I just hate when people get flamed for asking a question

murphys · 20/05/2015 11:54

I think the OP is getting a hard time here. Then she gets flamed and her post highlighted for saying that there is something she didn't know. She didn't know how serious the infection COULD be.

Maybe OP just needs some reassurance about it. Maybe others have been in the same situation. If her dd just had a runny nose, you can be sure the replies would be somewhat different.

As I said previously, and I am sure that OP now realizes, she posted on the wrong forum. Lots of posters use AIBU to nitpick only. Had this been posted elsewhere, I am sure she would have had the same helpful replies, with suggestions and a lot less personal attacks.

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 11:57

I'm not flaming, I'm pointing out that there is only one right answer to any question like this. And that answer is - it's impossible to know the correct answer on the information given and without medical training, ask a doctor. Pretending like the wisdom of forum posters is potentially a useful resource for questions like this is dangerous.

DottyStripes · 20/05/2015 11:59

Well I think humiliating somebody for asking a question is far more dangerous personally.

I'd far rather OP asks if she's doubting advice than not and ends up doing something potentially harmful because she was too scared to ask

Momagain1 · 20/05/2015 12:10

It would be reasonable to tell the doctor that dd seems better, her symptoms are releived, her complaints and distress gone. From your point of view, the first antibiotics did the job THEREFORE, you want a new urine sample to be tested before subjecting her to more antibiotics.

It is always possible that the sample or the paperwork got mixed up with another patients somewhere in the process. you may save your dd from taking unecesary medication, and you may help them find the right patient to give it to before that situation gets worse.

Theycallmemellowjello · 20/05/2015 12:14

Nope, sorry, pointing out that internet strangers are not qualified to advise is not humiliating anyone, it's just the only accurate and responsible answer to a question like this.

Oobis · 20/05/2015 13:35

Good grief! OP - let us know how you get on, I hope everything is as it should be.

From recollection, the question was "AIBU?" as opposed to "please may I have some unqualified medical advice and be judged?"

PlumpingThePartTimeMother · 20/05/2015 13:37

Well I think humiliating somebody for asking a question is far more dangerous personally.

^^this.

Floggingmolly · 20/05/2015 13:39

And she was told she was being unreasonable. She hasn't been hunted down and hung from the nearest tree. Or particularly "humiliated".
Dangerous? Confused

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