To be pretty p'd off?!

[Whyisitalwaysblue]

I haven't posted before but this really gets my goat!! I know a mum who phoned her kids in sick for a week so she could take them on holiday. I know it's expensive during the school holidays and normally it wouldn't bother me but one of the children has exams the week after. AIBU to think that this is bad parenting??!!

It's normal and courteous in my class, where the parents are in the classroom every morning, to ask how they are doing and if they're feeling better. It's also normal for the children to share their news with others, especially on a Monday.

I couldn't agree more Giles. School has it's place but so does out of school leaning and experiences and if that cannot be afforded during holiday term then I have no problems with a parent creating that opportunity by holidaying in term time.

Also agree about Spain and the Costa Del Sol. It's actually my favourite holiday destination. My point was others use it as an example of why a holiday might but be worth taking a child out of schools. It's not what I think personally. Short flight, beautiful place, amazing scenery, what's not to like .

So what do you tell your child to say at school Giles? Don't get me wrong, I totally agree with you about the holiday but I still think it puts them in a difficult position if you expect them to lie about it when they go back to school.

No tbh I don't think that Alaska is more educational than the costa del sol. Both have stunning natural scenery. Actually as the poster above says, the south of Spain has a lot in the way of culture. Of course there's a lot to learn about the history of Alaska too. But in general I don't think kids need to go on massively expensive holidays in order to learn. You can learn as much on the North Yorkshire coastline as you can on the Alaskan with the proper guidance. And actually, it's possible to see whales on trips from the british coastline as well.

Not that I have a problem with anyone going to Alaska - I just don't accept that it is more important than school. Ok while you're watching a whale you might think this is way better than maths class, and perhaps you'd be right. But does the one hour of whale watching outweigh the days of school missed while sailing across the Atlantic, staring at an empty sea or (more likely) mucking around on the cruise facilities?

Tbh I just think there's no excuse for saving something like that for the holidays and if it's too expensive then then IMO it's better to take a cheaper trip (if you can afford Alaska in term time you can afford Norway in the hols).

I disagree with other posters that primary education is more missable than secondary - I think that that is the age when you learn key skills and also lay the foundations for an attitude to learning. By GCSE students who have the skills mostly need to worry more about revision than class work.

in Dds case they knew she was away. The teachers were fine with it.

Dd could say what she likes when she gets back. but Dds never been asked any questions when she's off sick and id complain at any school hounding a child about where they'd been tbh. their beef would be with me not my child and I would make a complaint if I found out anything had been said to dd about it.

I dont think teachers questioning small children to catch them or their parents out (when it's not a child protection issue) is on quite frankly

I think there's a place for everything and yes, sometimes a holiday and what it offers is more important and educational than school. I think it's quite limited thinking to say that school is ALWAYS more important than school, 100% of the time and I am glad I don't think like that.

Sorry school is always more important than holidays

I can think of a lot of things that constitute bad parenting but taking children on holiday isn't one of them.

Even if it is during term time - we fully intend to do it if it works out cheaper, certainly throughout primary school. I guarantee DD will get a lot more out of a week away than a week in the classroom.

The only scenario in which it would be bad parenting would be if the child actually missed an exam.

I grew up in Belgium where there weren't the same rules we have in the UK. I don't think I ever did miss more than a few days a year but some did occasionally overlap. I value the holidays I went on and the experiences I had especially if it was somewhere where I spoke the language. I graduated with a first from a top 10 university so pretty sure it didn't do me any harm. I do find many people's attitudes to school somewhat sanctimonious but then I had otherwise very responsible parents who always put my education first. If you're talking about parents who don't really care whether it benefits their child then YANBU.

I don't think there's any hounding whatsoever! In our friendly, small school we greet each child (and the parents of the little ones) personally every day. If they've been off ill for a week of course I'm going to be concerned for them and ask both them and their parent if they're feeling better. Then the child will look embarrassed and awkward, as does the parent and I realise they've not been ill.

I think the rules are ridiculous too, I have no axe to grind. I'm taking my own daughter out for 2 days next month! I just think lying about it is silly. Maybe when they're older or in a bigger school no one would notice.

lying about Santa to a dc is different to telling them to lie for you. You are an adult and able to judge the appropriateness of a lie in any situation and even then adults get it wrong, a dc is still learning social morals and etiquette etc and asking them to be involved in a deceit is wrong.

Time out of school is totally fine - this isn't truanting or lazy neglectful parents which is what the system should be vetting for.

Nicki - School has it's place but so does out of school leaning and experiences

Never a truer word spoken!

School has it's place but so does out of school leaning and experiences

I also agree with this (who wouldn't?). At the risk of sound flippant isn't school's place term time and out of school learning's place the holidays? No one is saying no learning should ever take place outside of school

i find the real issue is with the holiday companies for tripling there prices i was looking for a holiday it will cost the best part of a thousand pounds and i dont fucking have it that was for a caravan fgs A FUCKING CARAVAN

But some of that learning and experience is unaffordable in term time so a sensible parent should be able to weigh up the pros and cons and decide accordingly.

I personally think that YANBU OP

ive had the kids teachers honour their holiday forms but asked them to take work with them. (they didn't do it though)

their schools are now saying that they will NOT honour holiday requests unless for an exceptional reason.. ie.. parent in the forces, religion (there were a couple more that I don't remember)

there is a girl in y8 that my dd is friends with and she has just returned from her SECOND two week holiday in florida since September. (they do this twice/three times a year) I asked her about it and her mum just 'phones in sick'.

To add. .
I dont necessarily think it's bad parenting I just find it really annoying!

I do agree with Giles about wind down month week at the end of summer term.

Obviously there will be people that take the piss butmost parents take a day / week whatever off here or there

I took DD2 out of school for a day to go to CenterParcs (my other DC had an inset day at a different school). I asked for it to be authorised. The HT phoned and said "I'm sorry Mrs Bit, I can't authorise this absence. But please don't let that stop you taking her and having a good time!" I thought that was a good attitude