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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pretty p'd off?!

93 replies

Whyisitalwaysblue · 16/05/2015 07:51

I haven't posted before but this really gets my goat!! I know a mum who phoned her kids in sick for a week so she could take them on holiday. I know it's expensive during the school holidays and normally it wouldn't bother me but one of the children has exams the week after. AIBU to think that this is bad parenting??!!

OP posts:
HaloKelly23 · 16/05/2015 08:35

And what if these particular children are completely fine with it?!
Without knowing the ins & outs why would anyone think it acceptable to judge these people & their parenting.

That IS idiotic behaviour.

NurseRoscoe · 16/05/2015 08:37

Many will disagree and that is absolutely fine as we all have opinions however for my own children I think school is more important than family holidays. We have lots of family day trips and I believe that there is plenty of time to travel as an adult. Purely my views though, I wouldn't go as far as saying it's bad parenting.

ChwatFeechers · 16/05/2015 08:37

Why are you pissed off, exactly? Confused Nothing to do with you.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 16/05/2015 08:38

You sound quite the charmer Halo -haha, quite the ironic name Hmm

VelvetRose · 16/05/2015 08:38

Well what if they're not fine with it?! How can any of us possibly know. Would you feel comfortable going back to work after a week off having called in sick? I certainly wouldn't.

NickiFury · 16/05/2015 08:39

What's it got to do with you exactly? You sound rather invested to be so annoyed about. Maybe stop nosying into what others are doing and you'll not feel so pissed off?

Littlemonstersrule · 16/05/2015 08:41

It is bad parenting, teaching children to lie, dismissing importance of exams and sending the message that school is not important. There are at least three months worth of time to go away in without doing any of those.

VelvetRose · 16/05/2015 08:44

It's perfectly acceptable to judge someone for making their child lie. It's not the end of the world I agree but I judge the parents of my pupils who do this. I don't like seeing a 6 year old squirming in embarrassment when asked by friends if he's feeling better or unable to share his exciting holiday news.

swimmerforlife · 16/05/2015 08:45

Term time holidays are almost surpassing P&C parking threads on MN.

YABU. 1 week out of school is not going to effect their education. The parent probably did was she thought was right for her child. Maybe she was going to close relative's wedding abroad, you do not know the circumstances.

Penfold007 · 16/05/2015 08:46

OP what do you plan on doing about this situation? Personally I'd mind my own business.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 16/05/2015 08:49

I don't get why you're pissed off, your kids aren't involved so why are you posting about another family and the decision they've made?

Gileswithachainsaw · 16/05/2015 08:49

People wouldn't have to lie if the whole thing wasn't so ridiculous.

what they think. They are "preventing" is people taking longer cheaper holidays more often.

In fact what they are really preventing is hard up families spending a week in a caravan courtesy of grandparents and potentially no chance of a holiday again.

pictish · 16/05/2015 08:52

Actually I agree about the lying. It's a significant, protracted and involved lie. I would balk at a primary aged child with a tan feeling pressured to pretend he or she had been ill, when it's clearly not true.

However, I think the situation is forced by peak time greedy, exploitative price hikes, rather than parents' desire to lie.

Original poster
Whyisitalwaysblue · 16/05/2015 08:55

Well I think I'm entitled to my opinion and I am entitled to express that. It's not like I am going to report her to the attendance police!! I just think it's irresponsible. If the kids are not at an important educational stage then fine. But don't lie. Tell the truth and take the consequences. If any.

OP posts:
pictish · 16/05/2015 08:58

What, like a large fine? Might as well go away in peak times then. Oh...but you can't afford that.

CupidStuntSurvivor · 16/05/2015 09:02

And how much is her child really going to cram in that week?

Do you think maybe she's in a better position than you are to determine how well prepared her child is and gauge whether the holiday is going to dampen her exam performance?

Keep your bleeding beak out.

SnowyPiglet · 16/05/2015 09:03

It is bad, Op, I agree. Making your children lie to their teachers and friends is awful. And revision week IS important, they may well regret it when faced with the exams and realising that a few hints, tips and extra revision would have really helped (depends obvs how old the children are). Holiday prices are more expensive in school holiday time but that is market forces for you & there's very little anyone can do about it. But if you can't afford the holiday you want in the school holidays, then don't do it. There are cheaper alternatives. You wouldn't buy the car you really wanted (Aston, Ferrari, perhaps?) if you couldn't afford it would you - you'd buy something cheaper.

BitOutOfPractice · 16/05/2015 09:05

Please op. Please for the love of god tell us what exams they're taking

1Morewineplease · 16/05/2015 09:08

Having worked with children in Key Stage 1 for a number of years I've witnessed countless times, when children have had holidays in term time, where the child is hopelessly lost in maths, literacy etc... And get teary when they don't understand or when they have to be brought up to speed separately .Support staff have to take time away from needier children in order to facilitate this catch up . Sometimes even friendship dynamics change . I'm not sure parents realise just how much learning time is lost during a cheap getaway... I understand some parents aren't ably to comply with term times but similarly if you can't afford to take your children to Disneyland during school holidays then find something cheaper.
So OP I get where you're coming from

Turquoisetamborine · 16/05/2015 09:08

I just couldn't drum up enough interest to care.
We've taken DS out of school for family holidays due to my work only allowing one out of 12 of us to have time off at any one time. And I would do it again.

Original poster
Whyisitalwaysblue · 16/05/2015 09:09

Haha no I don't want to. Lol. I don't think the type of exam (it's SATS) is important. I think it's the lesson the children learn. I am well aware that it is not my problem or business but I either save for a holiday or go somewhere cheaper because I wouldn't chose to teach my children that it's ok to call in sick to go and have fun.

OP posts:
pictish · 16/05/2015 09:11

Oh come on...what are you, a proud drone?

puddymuddles · 16/05/2015 09:11

Good for her. The rules about taking your kids on holiday during school time are stupid anyway, unless doing GCSEs or A levels. I say this as a teacher.

CupidStuntSurvivor · 16/05/2015 09:12

As in secondary school SATs?

EatDessertFirst · 16/05/2015 09:14

The lying is the bad bit of this.

We are taking DD ( year 1) out of school in June for a week to take a family holiday because a) DP's employer has changed his holiday at the last minute and b) we managed to get a cheaper holiday in term time.

We will be telling the school the truth and will pay any resulting fines. We won't be losing sleep over pearl clutchers who believe our DD's education will be ruined.

YABU and its none of your business. Move onto something worth your brainspace.

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