My goddaughter (A) is the DD of my closest friend and we have always been close. She has 2 (aged 8 and 6) DCs from her first marriage and she and her DH have a 2 year old DS from their marriage. He has a DD (7) from his first marriage. I've only met his DD once, at their wedding.
I see A's DCs quite often when she comes over to visit her parents or when the DCs are spending the weekend with their grandparents. I know the three of them really well.
A's DH has asked her to "have a word" with me and she's really embarrassed but he's been nagging so she did. I have always bought presents for A's DCs at Christmas and birthdays. He asked her to tell me I should also buy for his DD. A's parents always buy for his DD but they know her and actually see her.
A doesn't think I should. His family and family friends only buy for his DD and the toddler, nothing for A's DCs from her first marriage. She pointed this out to her DH but he said we're "better off" than they are and his DD is upset.
His DD wouldn't know me if she bumped into me in the street, so this is all from him. He is quite controlling and is not always kind to A's DCs. A's mum said to tell him to get lost.
I am inclined to say no but I'm a bit worried about how that will impact on A.
AIBU to say that I won't unless his family and friends are also buying for A's DCs, as that would be unfair on them.