to be a bit sad about the comments about how good it wasn't another boy

[PunkrockerGirl]

Mum of two (adult) boys here. Was just at some of the comments after the birth was announced about how fantastic it is that they've one of each. Am I being over sensitive?

But don't you think the commentators are bound to come out with something gushing and that's just the most obvious line? Bet if it had been a boy it would have been all 'how lovely for George to have a little brother to play with' etc

Yabu to be upset. Of course people who are interested in royal babies said 'how lovely, a boy and a girl'. They would have said 'how lovely, two little boys' if she had been a boy. It is rude to say 'oh right' or 'that's not good'. The only thing you can say is 'how lovely'. And it is lovely. I have 3 and each time the result has been lovely. It doesn't mean they are devaluing your family make up by being enthusiastic about someone else's. I think people are increasingly over sensitive. Don't look for slights.

Never a burning longing for me either,
I'm pleased she was as a girl as it takes the "competition/comparing" away just a bit

I'd be so grateful if I'm able to have children, but I would be sad if I never had a daughter or a son - a daughter more so.

I'm glad it was a girl.

If it was a boy the news would have been how she is getting more like Diana.

I agree that the only thing to say about the birth of another child is "how lovely".

However DS1 is 18 months, I am six months pregnant and when I tell people it is a boy they almost always say something like "oh well, you'll just have to try again". (One person actually said "bad luck" )

Generally the expectation is that you should have/must want a boy and a girl.

Of course the commentators would have said how wonderful either way, but in real life I have found it rare to be congratulated on being pregnant with a second boy.

Its all just silly pressure on women being perfect. I have two boys, but even 20 plus years ago there was this pressure to have 'a proper family' and my parents hated the 5 year gap,instead of 2 as my brothers had with theirs! Its not easy being a woman sometimes.

It's a case of "If you have to say something, say anything nice at all" (no matter how inane).

:D

I have dd, ds, ds...

When I only has dd and ds I remember being congratulated regularly for having "a pair"

When I mentioned/ confirmed I was pregnant with DC3 three mothers I knew well responded (on separate occassions) with something along the lines of "never mind, it can happen to anyone, you'll be fine"

People are properly strange in their responses to the gender of other people's babies.

As my DC2 has been bigger than my DC1 most of their lives the passing on clothes thing would appear not to always be a factor unless you ensure it with a thumping big age gap :D

I imagine some of the issue, is the news channels having to fill hours of coverage but with no real news.

Lots of rubbish can be spouted to fill the time....

sailor
I never said I was upset

You said you were sad. Sad/upset pretty similar?

I wonder if Zara &Mike will be passing on their handmedowns from their DD?

I would have liked 'one of each' simply because I think it might have been interesting to raise a boy and a girl
DH really wanted a second girl-which is what we got after two mcs
When they handed her to me I could only be grateful for a perefct, healthy, beautiful child . And have never 'minded' she wasn't a boy.A third was not an option .
I would quite like a grandson one day though!

It was never a dream of mine to have a girl. So happy with two boys. But some people are weird and think you would always want one of each for some reason.

The assumption is that if we all could choose our dc genders before birth, we would all choose to have one (or more) of each gender. That is probably true for most people. But we cannot choose the gender and parents are generally (there are sad exceptions) thrilled with whatever gender of child they have.

So when a b+g mix happens, everyone says great, you got what you would have chosen. I kinda get that. What amazes me is that people think you will be disappointed with 2 or 3 or 5 of the same gender, which is of course utter bullocks. And they voice that opinion! That is shocking and insulting.

I was not too fussed about gender but was really hoping for one of those child geniuses that write multi million pound software programmes by age 10. Hasn't gone my way. Still pleased with the dc though.

Surely it's being said just for something to say? If it was another boy they would be saying How lovely, just like Wills and Harry, two brothers will grow up close etc.

I said the same thing when I saw they had had a girl - Oh how nice, one of each and now she is done!

And I speak as a mother of 3 girls who is definitely done!

I was absolutely convinced (and perfectly happy about it if so, as I had always said, in my youth, that I wanted 4 boys), that my second was going to be another boy (dh's family only ever have boys). We didn't have any girls names sorted at all.

We were absolutely staggered when dd popped out - and beyond thrilled. Took us three days to come up with a name, mind you. But, for the sake of our bank balance, we decided to stop at that point.

But I have to admit, if you put me on the rack and forced a confession, that I might have opted to try for a third (and a girl), if dd had turned out to be a boy. But that's a dangerous game unless you're sure that you'll be happy if you don't get the gender you'd originally hoped for.

I do get irritated at the bollocks some people spout about certain genders though. Do people seriously believe that all boys are loud and wreck the joint, whilst girls sit quietly with books?

I'm really pleased she's a girl but I hoped George would be a girl so that the succession laws could be used. Seems such a waste otherwise.

I think you're over thinking it. If she'd had a boy people would have said ' great boys can be great friends' etc etc. It's just something to say

I was about to say YABU but I then thought about my reaction to friends who have only boys and I realised that, if I'm absolutely honest, I am glad I'm not them. They seem less connected with their boys once they get older, I assume because society makes it more difficult to be tactile and demonstrative and also because their common interests often lessen. Whereas friends with daughters seem to maintain that emotional and physical closeness for longer. That's a bit of a generalisation of course but I think it's often true.

Fwiw, I wanted boys and would have been fairly disappointed if ds2 had been a girl. However, some of the media comments today that now that they've got one of each their family is completed I found a bit meh.

Some people talk pure rubbish.

What limited thinking you must have to think everyone has the same ideas about family size/gender.

The Lady named Alice on the BBC news today who kept talking about everyone wanting one of each gender, didn't speak like much of a philosopher.

I think it's great she has one of each. How lovely she gets the experience of raising two different genders.

I'm sure they will have at least four children anyway.

Four? Do you think? I don't, not with the hideous pregnancies she's had.