To expect my Yr 9 DD to do 2hrs homework a night.

[sunshield]

My year 9 daughter is at present only doing about 45 minutes a night homework (she refuses to do anymore). she is getting away doing so little at the moment. The school expects year 9 girls to do between 8-10 hours homework a week DD is spending less than half of that time on homework.

The school sent a letter out to parents asking 'how much time does your daughter spend on her homework' I sent the letter back saying less than 4 hours per week DD was sent to the year head for a dressing down. DD is no calling me every name under the sun (being very rude). She is saying all her friends spend the same amount of time on their homework and that being dressed down by the year head was unfair. The school expects pupils to achieve A /* or level8/9 grades for GCSE so she was told in no uncertain terms by the year head that 45 minutes a night on homework was unacceptable. This is in contrast to her elder year 10 sister who always does/did over 2 hours a night homework (both are at the same school) even her year 7 brother does 1 hour a night .

Am I correct to ban her from using her computer (except for school work) until she can prove she has spent two hours on her homework that night.

I have never felt more sorry for boarding school kids than I have reading this thread.

Thanks Hakulyt. The term Secondary modern seems a bit outdated ?.

Non grammar schools are called Upper Schools where I am (Bucks) . The one DS choose to go instead of a grammar is an outstanding school and suits his personality better .

I would genuinely rather my child achieved all Cs and Ds in their exams than send them to boarding school. :s

I agree with most - none of my dc have ever reached a '2 hours a night' level even through GCSEs and 6th form. They have lives to live - it's not all about school work, they do all sorts of things with music, drama, sports, Scouts, outdoor activities, and, well, just chilling (or whatever teens call it these days).
ds (who is not especially academic) is at University and dd1 is predicted pretty good GCSE grades on their 'lighter touch' approach to homework.

I believe in telling it how it is. A school whose cohort is the 77% who didn't get into the grammar is a secondary modern.

Why do you think your dd's school insists on so much homework?

*akluyt Tue 28-Apr-15 23:07:03
"If your child isn't shining at school, doesn't mean he/she won't ever shine. Don't forget Richard Branson. Alan Sugar. Um.... most CEOs of most companies (look 'em up - they were all labelled as 'a bit thick' at school)!!!"

That really is bullshit!*

Why? Why are they exceptions to the rule and is that just because they happen to have made it on to TV? So is it true that anyone who 'failed' in school has to be written off as a complete failure? I don't think so, and my business proves otherwise!

You cannot label someone as stupid because they didn't make the grade pre-16/18. But perhaps I'm wrong. It happens.

Your DS was lucky to find an Ofsted outstanding secondary school, as I hear there aren't many of them.

However, going back to the 2 hours homework per night, I can't see how that would make for a well rounded individual.

There's just no time for other, out of school activities and they are important too.

Sorry, I meant I hear there aren't many of them in Buckinghamshire.

Hak err that's completely bizarre. What about those of us who never tried out for grammar in the first place? There's no grammar school near me.

Richard Branson had two rather important factors helping him. Loaded Parents Father a Millionaire (when it meant something) connected Banker and public school (Stowe) connections to the city and finance. Richard Branson's 21st Birthday Present was a Rolls Royce ! So we can disregard him from coming up from nothing. Alan Sugar is an exception . However, today you will have zero chance of getting an executive position in a company without excellent academic qualifications. The other truth is banks will be very unlikely to lend money to anyone with a business without an excellent CV. Therefore no education no executive position = no funding for business start up.

Yr8 in the local academy, depend's what the teacher give's her, some night's she has non, others she has more and always has some on a weekend.

I find it interesting that the school obviously didn't know (until they asked you) that she was only spending half the time on her homework. If she's doing well, then leave her to it.

Anyone who believes that you are defined by your education at the age of 18 or younger...

It sounds like she's got a good work life balance by doing 45 mins a night. 2 hours is crazy. Fancy expecting a child to work 9 till 3.30, then 4.30 till 6.30. When would such a children find time to socialise, do clubs, relax, play with their siblings, chat to their parents?

Sunshield the CEO of the last company I worked for was 34 and had no degree...

I also know a few mid level executives (still young, mid twenties) in marketing and advertising with no degree.

It is harder, no doubt, but it's not impossible by any means.

Richard Branson's 21st Birthday Present was a Rolls Royce ! So we can disregard him from coming up from nothing. Alan Sugar is an exception . However, today you will have zero chance of getting an executive position in a company without excellent academic qualifications. The other truth is banks will be very unlikely to lend money to anyone with a business without an excellent CV. Therefore no education no executive position = no funding for business start up.

Ok,ok. So Richard Branson was a bad example because he was bankrolled. Not so Alan Sugar. Barrow boy who worked hard and smart. The point is, anyone can make good with the right personality and confidence and confidence comes from stability in the home, not school.

And Banks not lending to anyone without an excellent CV is just utter rubbish and if that's your experience then you need to change Banks, or start charming your Bank Manager! They do lend, still, and it depends on your requirements and their risk adversity.

Sounds like you're writing your kids off for not spending 2 hrs+ per day on homework. YABU. Have a little more faith in them.

I think Sugar and Branson are more of a sizeable minority than exceptions to any rule. It certainly isn't bullshit to show examples of what can be achieved without being academic.

Plenty of people I know left school without many qualifications. Most did fairly well. In fact, given my time again I might be tempted to do the same. I doubt I would go to uni. It just wasn't all it was cracked up to be even though I completed my degree (and met my husband there).

I am having another one of my culture shock "British people are so strange" moments reading this thread!

I mean, people really do prize lazily coasting to an A more than grafting for hours for the A.

I don't mean it in a bad way, it's just nuts to me.

Yeah I'm a tiger mother. 8-10 hours seems fine for an ambitious academic 14 year old. I was doing more than that and I don't resent my (tiger) parents. That hard work is the reason DH and I have comfortable lives now.

I also spent 10-12 hours per week on sports and 6-8 on music and drama. And I had lots of friends.

I think it perfectly possible to study 1-2 hours, do a hobby, and be balanced. It won't suit everyone.

I went to a king Edwards grammar back in the day. It was crap.

My kids went/go to an an outstanding comp.

Older 2 been through uni, have degrees, hobbies, girlfriends and both play instruments.

I always had a bad feeling about present day boarding schools/grammar schools but seriously this thread is very very sad.

Hold it's not suiting the ops dd.

That's the whole fucking point!

Worry. Sorry DS school is grade 2 'Good' not outstanding !. However, DS has had a enjoyable year 7 and 61% GCSE pass rate is good enough.

It is harder, no doubt, but it's not impossible by any means.

Absolutely agree. It IS harder and those without the sacred university degrees have had to work doubly hard to get where they are. But it's possible and very evident in most workplaces. I tend to find those that don't have degrees are easier to work with and pitch in more because they don't think the world owes them a living. Damn those universities that declare their students will walk into a well paid/high rolling job as soon as they leave university. Makes their job easier, doesn't it?

They do the children a great disservice.

Yes but is that because she's being lazy or because she cannot cope with more than 45 minutes a night?

It could be either. Only the OP knows for sure.

But if it was laziness, I would come down on it like a ton of bricks. There's nothing worse than squandering talent and opportunities.

If she is trying her best but exhausted that's totally different.

I have absolutely no idea how long dd1 spends on homework each night, she is responsible for doing it and I trust the school to recognise if it's not up to standard and do something about it. She's in year 10 at an ordinary comp and is predicted 12 A*s, and I have rarely seen her homework since she started secondary.

In the school I teach (outstanding comp) we expect our clever year 9s to do roughly 1 hour per day of homework but that can vary depending what needs to be done. I teach Maths and set homework to Year 9 twice a week and never set a piece of work that I think will take more than about 20 mins as I am aware of how many other subjects they have to fit in in a limited time. Quite a lot of our kids work longer hours than their parents by the time commuting and homework is included.