to ask about child protection plan? (Sorry this is long)

[concernedaunty]

Name changed regular.

Long story cut short, my brother was married to a lady with learning difficulties and they had a son. Son now 8. His wife could stay at home independently with the baby, but could not meet his needs long term on her own if that makes sense? She was always very paranoid and eventually left him due to her having suspicions that he was after a visa (we are not UK nationals, but settled in the UK for many years so visa certainly not an issue)

Her family were very much on board with her as they always had reservations about my forrin brother. They had a good relationship though, could see he looked after her and the baby well etc. Brother had every weekend access, she always made accusations of abuse that were always investigated and deemed to be untrue. Contact during these investigations was always stopped and/or supervised. Social worker report always stated that it was clear that the boy was being manipulated to say certain things etc.

My ex SIL is now in a relationship and is pregnant. (We didn't know this as the boy is always picked up/dropped off with his maternal uncle, so no contact with the mother) My brother got weekend contact again several months ago after an abuse investigation (which again was proved untrue) and got a phone call from social services calling him for a child protection meeting. We were all really shocked, went along for the meeting where his ex wife was with her advocates, 17 other professionals in the room ranging from nephews school teacher to paediatrician to police officer.

We were allowed access to the report half an hour before the meeting started and we were totally horrified at what we read. It was something out of your worst nightmare. How nephew frequently masterbates, encourages classmates to do the same, tries to touch adults genitals etc. Also according to school teacher is emotionally disturbed, has constant anxiety outbursts in class. This is not the loving, friendly boy we know at the weekends!!!

All of this came about as mother claimed that nephew is sexually abusing her boyfriend (!) and claims that my brother instructed him how to etc. There is something we are not being told, a few times my ex SIL went to say things and a police officer said "I advise you not to say that" etc. Her boyfriend is supposedly banned from her home (due to these allegations) but nephews social worker wrote in his report that nephew is frequently sent outside so that boyfriend can enter the house as she cannot cope on her own.

Sorry this is so long, basically the chairperson (?) concluded that ex SIL is not aware of the importance of keeping nephew safe and he is now on child protection list/register. It was stated that nephew is emotionally abused (confirmed) and at likely risk of sexual abuse and neglect. We are completely devastated, can't believe that we haven't been told this before and obviously we are distraught for nephew. My brother has now applied for full custody, all of previous SS reports were positive about how he has a great bond with DN etc.

My question is, if one child is on child protection will the unborn baby automatically be? We are so keen to get DN out of this situation. I can't believe that this has gone on for so long (report states concerns about DN's sexualised behavior/emotional disturbance several years ago) and no one has raised it, let alone a child being allowed to stay in this situation. Court date in 8 weeks so DB has supervise contact until then.

Many thanks if you have read this far!

Also we were told that the report was strictly confidential therefore could not talk to anyone about this. Are we allowed a copy of it?

You said that there was concern from the Maternal family in the past regarding your DB. Now there is concern regarding this new Man in your Sil's life.

It seems this Lady is not trusted to make good partner decisions by others.

The SIL raised concerns about her ex which were not believed.

The end result is a child displaying concerning behaviour.

Your DB now wants to leave his wife and babies to live with the child alone.

Really sorry to hear this, must have been an awful shock for you. Babies considered to be at risk can be removed from the hospital if there is significant evidence. If it is deemed the bf is the risk then it may come down to whether or not she can cut contact. Do you think that she would and if she did would she be deemed fit to cope as a single parent? I hope your DN gets somewhere safe soon. If your DB isn't granted access is there any other family that could take him in?

Another useful resource www.frg.org.uk/images/Advice_Sheets/9-child-protection-procedures.pdf
Sorry it's not a link, no idea how to do that, can someone help? Or google Family Rights Group and look at the advice sheets in there.

Given that English isn't your DB's first language it is even more shocking that communication has been so poor. You have some very relevant questions about safety if related children which the SW needs to address. It would be worth you writing a list of questions and your DB organising a meeting with the social worker. They should've happy for you to attend as well to support him.

Wow it magically linked without me doing anything.

Your brother should have a copy of all reports. He needs these to get legal advice.

Trying to fight for custody in the middle of a child protection plan while your db is himself only allowed supervised contact is going to be very very difficult. I would recommend in the first instance arranging a meeting with the sw to talk everything through and to try to get their support or rather your DB meeting them and trying to get support from them and also to find out what their long term view is.

Sorry have to go to hospital now and I will read/reply this later. I really appreciate the responses.

Joan ex SIL's parents were only concerned about him because he is not white english. No concerns regarding his safety.

Yes he will live apart from his wife. She is capable of providing a loving, caring home for DTD's. Ex SIL is not, therefore DN has to be the priority for now.

You might also find helpful info here

I think those things will be very concerning to the professionals.

concernedaunty have you considered the new partner's background? Just going on what you said about your exSIL being told not to comment on something regarding him by the police officer, but my first thought would be whether he has any previous convictions that could cause alarm.

I sincerely hope this is all resolved soon for the little boy's sake - you and your DB clearly care a great deal for him.

I am sorry if this sounds too simplistic , but with careful questioning by properly trained professionals would your DN be able to explain what's going on in his life. Also your DB needs to find the best legal people he can to support him and find out once and for all what is going on .
Wishing you the best of luck .

Just to clarify as I think a few were unsure; my DB said he would move out of his house IF he got custody and DN was considered a risk to his little sisters. Obviously the ideal thing would be to live all together however if that would pose a problem then needs must. DN is the priority at the moment (and thankfully his wife is fully on board)

DB spoke to his solicitor yesterday who said that exSIL's boyfriend has been questioned by the police. The child protection plan is in place due to confirmed emotional abuse, likely sexual abuse and neglect in his resident home. The solicitor said that if SS suspected DB of doing something untoward then he would not be allowed unsupervised access to his DTD's. The solicitor also believes that any appeal made is unlikely to be considered due to the nature of the content of the report.

It is unfortunately just a waiting game now until the day of court. We care very much about him and want what is best for him.

Thanks for the responses.

skin DN has been "interviewed" many times in the past regarding allegations (both physical and sexual) and the reports always come back the same, no evidence of either, and that DN is being told what to say by his Mum. She has been pulled up on this (as she lied in court as well) but I think due to her LD they don't pursue this.

At the meeting yesterday it was a unanimous decision that he is at risk. DB has been instructed not to bring the issue up with him, or try to get info out of him and has been referred to a specialist sexual abuse centre, but as I said the referral time is about 6 months apparently.

What a difficult situation for your family. If your DB was at the CP meeting then he would be entitled to a copy of the minutes of the meeting but perhaps not the report. Does he have parental R&R for his son?

I am a SW in Scotland so we do things differently but there will be a plan in place for DN and it is probable that there is a back up plan should your ex-sil not adhere to the plan. This would likely recommend removing him. If this happens it sounds like your DB would be in good place to get care of him.

He will be being visited weekly so hopefully the SW will be keeping a very close eye on things. I hope things work out for the sake of your DN. He sounds very troubled.

What is parental R&R cashew?

DB was just awarded every Friday-Sunday and this kicked off again (there is a pattern in the allegations; any extra contact he requests, changes in his life such as remarriage, DTD's being born etc) For about 8 months it was once a week in a contact centre as they had to investigate and then wait for court. It is now back to the contact centre once a week for 2 hours.

That is a relief to know that a SW will be keeping tabs.

Your DB needs to discuss residence with the social worker. If they are concerned enough they may try to persuade mum to let him take him. They can't force her without a court order.

Rights and responsibilities. He will have these if he is on the birth certificate. If not he can apply to court for them.

He is on the birth certificate so I assume he has R & R?

Yes he will have. This is very helpful especially if your DB would like full time care of his son.

In honesty about it has been a very hard situation in the sense that ex SIL and her family have tried to put a stop to contact at every opportunity. Once when DB went to pick him up from his maternal uncle's home he threatened DB that he would "get him seen to" if he didn't stop contact. Of course he ignored it, he is his son and will never give up on him.

Contact is now one day per week for two hours supervised in a contact centre.

We are gob smacked that DN is still allowed to be with his Mum in light of the many, many concerns. I thought children were put into care for less.

Her boyfriend was completely banned from her home until she became very distressed and said she could not manage without him, therefore (again probably because of her LD) SS relented and said he could come to her home when DN was out at school etc. In the meeting the SW raised the concern that DN complained that he was being sent outside to facilitate the boyfriend's visits. This is one of the ways that they feel that she is not prioritising DN's needs.

If child's father is named on the birth certificate, he has PR and can excercise this to protect his son. He can keep the child after contact to protect him if no residence order is in place and apply urgently to court for a residence order in his favour. He should discuss this with the child's social worker and his solicitor

^^ this. It's what DH had to do for DSD with the backing (she unofficially advised it) of a social worker.