To be peeved that friend has another good sleeper

[widdle]

First child slept through at 4 months old and new DS is now doing 11 hours at night at 4 months!!

Meanwhile my DS (nearly 2) woke at 1:30am thirsty then insisted on lying on top of me then drank so much water he peed through his nappy!

Obviously I'm happy for her not really, I'm incredibly bitter

Wouldn't change DS for the world but did secretly hope she would get a rubbish sleeper just so she could understand my pain.

Please flame away - I'm obviously a horrid person!

Yes YABU

DS1 is 9 now and was always a very good sleeper, would just go down at 7pm and gurgle to himself for a few minutes then fall asleep smiling. He slept through from about 6 months onwards and with the exception of illness he's always remained a decent sleeper (though he does listen to a meditation cd to fall asleep now, as he struggles to switch off, his brain is very buzzy).

DS2 came along 5 years later and oh my word, he was a hell-baby from day one. The only way he slept was on my chest, he was stubborn as a mule and defied all known laws on human biology when it came to sleep. We just learned tactics to deal with it, took turns with him and leaned heavily on close family and friends for support when it reached crisis-point. He's 4 now and sleeps, mostly, but still has weeks where he'll be up at mad o'clock for no reason. I've aged 47 years since he appeared.

I agree with the pp who suggested it might be hereditary; I've always slept well and DS1 takes after me. DH is an awful sleeper, wakes up at a gnat's fart, in and out of bed all night, tosses and turns constantly. Satan DS2 clearly takes after him.

I think we all have slightly different ideas of sleeping through. Obviously people have different ideas as to how many hours counts ads through the night. Also some of us count it as sleeping through if they do it most nights.

With ds, at 5 ish months he was going all night with waking himself but would wake us up by crawling down the bed (front sleeper) and needing to go back in his covers. I counted that ad sleeping through as he was not drinking any milk!

He wakes once sometimes at 14 months and I am too wet to refuse him milk (cow's) even though he would be better off not having it. I just want a quick fix to get back to sleep!

I think yanbu but remember it wouldn't actually benefit you if she had a bad sleeper. As long as we all acknowledge that it is mostly luck to get a good sleeper then we can wish each other well.

Yanbu! A couple of my friends had babies that fell quickly into night routines of going to sleep at 7 and waking at 11 and 3, and sleeping through by 2 months. They genuinely have never known sleep deprivation. Who wouldn't be a bit jealous of that?

Oh one of those is she OP. As.my much missed Nan would say. There's always one.
Bet she talks in a ceebeebees voice as well! I can't even spell it let alone speak It.

i hate to state the obvious but my dd was a wonderful sleeper a brilliant child yes she had her tantrums but they were manageable BUT as a teenager she has managed to get social workers involved because she lied the most horrible lie and all my kids are on child protection register because they believe the lie despite her telling them its a lie (hell if your confused you should try being me)

i would rather have a shit sleeper good sleepers bite you in the ass

I have heard it's genetic. My mum claims I slept through from birth (???) surely she should have been feeding me?! But it was in the days where women stayed in hospital for 2 weeks post birth so I think the nurses fed me!

DH also a good sleeper. As MIL would like to tell me constantly how he slept through from 7 weeks. However, we did have 2 good sleepers. Nothing we did!

Can imagine how annoying it would be to hear this so I never broadcast the fact.

YANBU.

That is all.

MIL told me she was pissed off that I had a good sleeper.

WTF surely you would want your son and DIL not to suffer?

Anyway, YAB a bit U as it won't help you if she suffers, but I can totally understand having evil sleep deprived thoughts.

My toddlers have slept well but been DEMONS and I get a bit this way when friends have good behaved ones. I would just like them to have a little taste so I wasn't on my own. But I know that's slightly evil.

I will admit to a moment of pure joy once. My friend, who is lovely, had an angel child. Quiet, well-behaved, biddable, just sweet as sugar. DD is... spirited. She always said that she saw I worked harder than her, it was all luck and she knew my DD had a good heart so would be OK. I love her.

Her DH told me that their DD's behaviour was all down to parenting. When their DD hit 3 and turned into a scene from the Exorcist, I sympathised with her... Not him.

He did have the decency to ask my advice and said, "we have no skills". Damn right.

My first DS is still waking in the night at 2 years 2 months - luckily he goes back down relatively quickly after a drink of water etc.

DD (11 weeks), on the other hand, sleeps 8pm - 7am without a feed and has done so since 7 weeks!!

She is gaining weight perfectly so Im not at all worried about the dropped feeds. They are all different despite consistent parenting. Luck of the draw really.

DS slept through at six weeks and DW's SIL never quite forgave us

i can't say i blame you for feeling this way.
however, not one person call win 'em all and there's simply no way she's going to blithely coast through parenthood indefinitely.
life is just not like that. for anyone.
everyone eventually has their own struggles and no-one lands on their feet 100% of the time.

It's swings and roundabouts. My cousin's DCs are terrible sleepers, but will eat anything that's put in front of them, including all veg. My DCs sleep well, but put up a fight pretty much every mealtime and have to be tricked or bribed into eating anything vaguely healthy.
She doesn't offer me "helpful" advice on food; I keep my mouth shut about her bedtime routines and sleeping arrangements.

If your evil OP so am I! I have wished several friends with good sleepers have a screamy non sleeping reflux baby next time like I did. No luck so far though! Makes me feel better that my DS is such a laid back toddler compared with some of their kids. You can't have everything!

Absolutely, Chicken!
All children bring their issues at one point or another. One might sleep but might throw horrendous tantrums vice versa. One might be an angel as a child but completely unruly as a teen again vice versa.
Like I said it a previous post I never slept and wAs wild as a toddler. Not cheeky. Just extremely hypo and playful. What kids do I suppose but mum said I took it to the extreme.
But I was a model teen. I'd come in when I was asked and not a minute later. I didn't drink sleep around or smoke. And with a nan like mine. I'd dersent back chat. !!!

YABU. Obviously.

Yabu, jealousy is ugly op. How horrible to wish a child have sleeping problems.

Oh dear. I've been there, really I have. In the words of Elsa, you need to let it go.

Parenthood is a long game. Sometimes the wonderful sleepers turn into shitty ones when they move to a bed (or whatever). Sometimes they are always good sleepers but the pickiest eater imaginable. She'll get her karmic share.

My awful sleeper turned into a dream at 2.5 when she dropped her daytime nap.

Unfortunately by then we had DC2 who was even worse! If she doesn´t sort it in the next few months she´ll be given to the fairies . . .

Every time I meet a new parent it´s the first question I ask about their child and I am glad when they say they have a rubbish sleeper

IABU

YANBU.

DH and I are only children, partially due to us both being terrible sleepers. I spent the whole of my pregnancy being told by DM and DMIL that I wouldn't sleep again for two years at least.

At 14 weeks, DD slept 6 - 6 and has done so ever since. She has 6oz bottle of formula every 3 hours whilst awake. DM and DMIL seem almost disappointed. I don't blame them - we have done nothing to get her like this, it's just the way she is.

She did, however, spend her first three weeks in NICU with meningitis, they were very strict with establishing a routine with her and we just carried on what they did. I wouldn't recommend that though!

Blessed with two good sleepers here who both went throgh by 12 weeks. I dont do well on little sleep and that felt like a lifetime to me! Hats off to you with the not so snoozy types.

I had a good sleep. had a good sleeper. Now at two it's all gone a bit shit, all loss are crap sleepers, it just appears at different times. Getting it out the way quickly is better I recon, so you win!

All kids, not loss.

My two were both fab sleepers. Ds2 slept through from 6 weeks and 6 years later I can count the number of times he's been up in the night on one hand. Ever. Thank Christ.

However, he is a bundle of screechy energy in the daytime and I've just had to haul him indoors for showing his willy to the next door neighbour.