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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think I need to be handed a grip...

37 replies

vvviola · 20/04/2015 17:40

I am going away on Friday with DH. 2 night in a town we both love. It is the first time the two of us have been away on our own together in 4 years.

And I'm on the verge of cancelling.

It's the first time I have left DD2 overnight since she was born. (She's 3.5, the trip 4 years ago was when I was about 16 weeks pregnant). Logically I know it will all be fine - she'll be with my parents, her big sister will be there, she's thoroughly comfortable at my parents house, and she's looking forward to her "sleepover". Added to the fact that my DM has paediatric healthcare experience and is a trained teacher of exactly DD2's age group. DD2 will genuinely be in better hands and having more fun than with me. But I can't get it out of my head that it would be a bad idea to go, and I should just stay home until DD is 25

(DM would, incidentally have taken her from much younger but it wasn't possible due to where we all lived at the time, bottle refusal by DD2 for ages and a few other complications. DM first had DD1 overnight at 9 months old)

So, AIBU to think I need to be handed a grip and told to go off and enjoy myself and stop with all this "I don't think I should go lark" before DH takes me at my word and leaves without me

OP posts:
undercoverfashionvictim · 20/04/2015 17:45

I see zero problem here.

If you carry on like this you will eventually smother your child and ruin the weekend away for both yourself and your partner.

YABU, heres your grip/

Stealthpolarbear · 20/04/2015 17:45

:o
go or the next time you go away without her she'll be dropping you off at the airport

financialwizard · 20/04/2015 17:47

Hands you a grip

Seize the opportunity with both hands.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 20/04/2015 17:47

It sounds a lovely opportunity to go out with DH. It sounds to me, it is too rare an event for you to feel relaxed beforehand - so probably a good idea after this weekend to put more such dates in the diary, so you get used to the notion.

pictish · 20/04/2015 17:47

I'm kindly handing you a gentle grip. Smile
Off you go. It will be fine.

OurGlass · 20/04/2015 17:48

Honestly, get a grip and enjoy the time away.

HappyJustToBe · 20/04/2015 17:50

You'll be fine once you're on your way and the joy of freedom sets in Smile

No need to tell you that she will be fine!

BlackNoSugar · 20/04/2015 17:50

Go! When you arrive, take five minutes to phone home and check everything is ok so you can relax - you'll convince yourself on the trip there that it was an awful idea, and you'll need to get that out of your head. You know your DM can contact you if there's an emergency, you also know that your DM can cope with everything up to and including an emergency so your DDs are in safe hands.

Then forget all about it and enjoy yourself Wink

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 20/04/2015 17:55

here's an ENORMOUS GRIP !!!!

You lucky, lucky woman.

Penfold007 · 20/04/2015 17:58

Why is leaving DD2 such an issue? You seem okay leaving DD1. You know they will both have a great time so relax and enjoy your mini break Flowers

TheWordFactory · 20/04/2015 17:58

Here's a grip....grab hold, OP.

WhatsGoingOnEh · 20/04/2015 17:58

Are you concerned about your DD2 specifically? Or do you have a vague feeling of dread about the trip that you think must be about DD2, but might just in fact be a bad feeling about the trip itself?

If the former, go - have fun! If it's the latter (just a weird feeling that you shouldn't go), then I (great believer in premonitions) wouldn't go.

McFox · 20/04/2015 17:59

Definite grip required. We've done this already and DS is 10 months. We're going on another 2 night trip soon. He has a ball with his grandparents and I trust them, so I don't see the problem.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 20/04/2015 18:02

Please go you are doing all of you a disservice if you don't

DisappointedOne · 20/04/2015 18:06

DD is 4.5 and I haven't been away from her for more than a night yet. Not a case of getting any sort of grip, I just haven't wanted to!

vanillabananashake · 20/04/2015 18:09

Well, YABU :) and have a great time but more generally, why is not having our children away from us a bad thing when they are so young? Mine haven't slept away from me, ever - I doubt they'd mind if they did but it just hasn't happened.

TheCunnyFunt · 20/04/2015 18:22

YABU! She will be absolutely fine and you know she will! Go away with your DH and have a wonderful time together Smile

flora717 · 20/04/2015 18:50

Pack. Go. Go. Go!

Momagain1 · 20/04/2015 18:59

*Are you concerned about your DD2 specifically? Or do you have a vague feeling of dread about the trip that you think must be about DD2, but might just in fact be a bad feeling about the trip itself?

If the former, go - have fun! If it's the latter (just a weird feeling that you shouldn't go), then I (great believer in premonitions) wouldn't go.*

HOWEVER, if it is the latter, and you stay home, the DDs still go to grandmas.

Another GRIP for your pile

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 20/04/2015 19:01

chucks several grips at OP

Go on and have a good time Smile

MedusaIsHavingaBadHairday · 20/04/2015 19:01

Pack and GO....

I didn't. We are having our first trip (3 days) away since the kids were born, this coming half term. Our eldest IS taking us to the airport....

She's 23..... Grin

(to be fair we were Forces and no relatives near, but still.... 23 years is a long wait for a break!)

PoppyFleur · 20/04/2015 19:03

Go!

Firstly, a child's relationship with grandparents is a very special thing, don't deprive your children or your parents this opportunity to build special memories.

Secondly, your relationship with your DH is special & time away together is a good opportunity to remember great times together away from the daily grind of routine.

Go, have fun & enjoy yourself!!

Notatallsleepy · 20/04/2015 19:08

If you don't go I'll have your ticket. I'm very jealous! Go and enjoy it for goodness sake!!

silverglitterpisser · 20/04/2015 19:10

Take this grip with love n kindness n go have an amazing break! Wine

Stubbed · 20/04/2015 19:12

I left my dc for the first time last weekend (dd is 20 months) was also pretty wobbly about it. Anyway had an amazing weekend, as did the dc. Recommended.