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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dogs should always be under close control, even if they are just being friendly?

220 replies

Model5 · 20/04/2015 12:56

I'm scared of dogs. I know that's my issue and I deal with it as best I can but I don't want dogs I don't know approaching me.

Out running in the woods early this morning, most of the other people about at that time of day are either runners or dog walkers. In my hour, I had two dogs run over and slobber over my legs, one just up and put muddy paw prints all over me and another came over yapping and growling at me. Another (big one) chased & frightened me and I stood stock still praying for it to go away while it's owner called several times without success.

All of the owners, were kind of apologetic, but in aw bless, what can you do, he just wants to say hello/play kind of way.

TBH, even if I wasn't scared I wouldn't be very impressed by the slobber and paw prints.

Lots of other dogs just trotted by without giving me a second glance and several owners took hold of their dogs as they saw me approach (which I always say thank you for) so I know it's possible to stop dogs approaching me. Lots of owners seem to think it's not necessary. Is it them or me? I realise I came to no real harm. Do I just need to accept that if I go out at prime dog walking time, I'm going to get growled at, chased, slobbered over etc?

OP posts:
lemonhope · 20/04/2015 14:03

Not all dogs slobber. Only certain breeds.

kinkyfuckery · 20/04/2015 14:05

YABU

Not really, I just wanted to be the one to say that Wink

MrsCookieMonster · 20/04/2015 14:05

YADNBU this drives me mad. I'm scared of dogs and DH is allergic and could have an asthma attack if licked by a dog but all the time you can across stupid people saying he is only being friendly. Well how about I jump and slobber on you and see if you like it!
Should say obviously there are loads of responsible dog owners so this doesn't apply to everyone but I'm amazed at the number of people who think that you should love their dog as much as they do.
And they should always be on leads in public places but there should be specific dog parks (that I can avoid) where they can run off lead.

sparechange · 20/04/2015 14:06

lemonhope
If it is 'bloody annoying', then do something about it. If you don't know how to do something about it, ask for help that someone that does. But don't blame a breed when it isn't more likely your lack of training

How can it both something you aren't bothered about and something you find really annoying? Confused

lemonhope · 20/04/2015 14:06

Oh well we'll have to agree to disagree. My dogs are lovely and I've never had anyone complain about them yet. They aren't robots but they are well trained enough for us to live very happily with the people around us

timelyreminder · 20/04/2015 14:08

YANBU. "S/he is just being friendly" is always trotted out but is not a valid excuse at all.

namechange2015 · 20/04/2015 14:08

Yanbu
I have a dog & I would never let him jump or slobber on someone else. Blimey, talk about giving us a bad name!!

GentlyBenevolent · 20/04/2015 14:08

I've never had anyone complain about them yet

I bet that's not true. They just haven't complained to your face. If your dogs are chasing cyclists and you are laughing about it you will have created a lot of pissed off people.

mousmous · 20/04/2015 14:12

If dogs have to be kept permanently on the lead, how do they ever run and play?

by having a large enough garden where you can do that or campaining for enclosed dog runs in parks?

namechange2015 · 20/04/2015 14:16

If dogs have to be kept permanently on the lead, how do they ever run and play?

They don't, you just have to train them not to jump, or approach other people without your say so. It's easy, give the dog a treat every time you pass someone & he DOESNT jump. It's not rocket science.
Either that or drive miles to find an empty field.

StarsInTheNightSky · 20/04/2015 14:19

Re the how can dogs run and play, in our case on our acres of fenced land which is their home. In public is not the place to be out of control unless you're at a specific off leash area, and even then your dog should still be under your control.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 20/04/2015 14:21

Yanbu op, my dog is a border collie and will happily chase runners to see where they are going to that is so exciting. This is why I've trained her to recall and do so every time I see someone running, as I'm pretty sure if they are out for a run they don't want to stop and play with her.

I do have a problem with this right to run anywhere attitude from some posters, I do think it can be antisocial and dangerous to run on pavements and parks when you are not prepared to stop.

I was getting on the bus last week, walked from the stop to the kerb and put out my hand. A runner who hadn't noticed me had to swerve and then shouted and swore at me for getting in his way. It didn't seem to occur to him that he nearly caused an accident by not looking where he was going, it was much more important that he'd had to slow down slightly Angry

tabulahrasa · 20/04/2015 15:01

"If dogs have to be kept permanently on the lead, how do they ever run and play?"

You pick very carefully where you let them offlead, you run with them in a harness you spend extra time doing activities with them.

My dog has medical issues - because other owners don't control their dogs he's now so aggressive with dogs that he can't be offlead or unmuzzled in public...even an obviously stressed dog, on a short lead and wearing a muzzle with me shouting over he is not friendly - I still get, oh it's ok mine is friendly.

If people won't recall their dog even when they can see it's fairly likely it's going to be attacked by mine (not successfully obviously as the muzzle stops that, but it doesn't stop him trying) you've got pretty much no hope of them doing it out of basic decency.

Thankfully they are an annoying minority of dog owners who think that their dogs should be allowed to annoy other people.

MagelanicClouds · 20/04/2015 16:04

Yanbu!
I am not a fan of dogs. When dh and I went on our first date - a nice picnic in the park - some random big dog ran up to me when I was sat on our picnic blanket and tried to lick my face. Eugh! I'd been hoping for a nice snog that day, but not that!
I had a dog jump up at me when I was pg and it pushed me over. I got the same 'he's only being friendly' line from the owner. Never mind the pregnant lady lying in the dirt then, if he's only bring friendly! Angry How is that friendly? And the horrible thing left mud on me and made a small hole in my top.

ScorpioMermaid · 20/04/2015 16:05

YANBU we have a dog and shes super friendly but we don't let her off her lead. Partly due to her being deaf and partly as she is a staffy and people are intimidated by her.

ihatelego · 20/04/2015 16:13

yanbu i love dogs but hate having strange dogs run up to me and jump at me!

maninawomansworld · 20/04/2015 16:17

As a dog owner myself - YANBU at all!

If I call my dogs to heel, they heel until I tell them 'off you go'.
Dogs should be under control, end of!

whippetwoman · 20/04/2015 16:17

YANBU but things like this is why I will never own another dog. It's very hard to find space to let my dog off the lead for a proper run. He is well trained and would never chase a jogger or run up at them, or anyone, he's a whippet so is indifferent to people and most other dogs, has good recall etc but I am always so worried when I take him out and it's just not relaxing for him or me as a walk is a constant anticipation of who is coming, do they have a dog etc? We really are NOT a nation of dog lovers and somehow dog owners are always in the wrong. However, it goes without saying YANBU.

TheWitTank · 20/04/2015 16:25

YANBU. I have similar when I'm horseriding. Some people let their dogs bound over and jump up/run between my horses legs. Luckily horse is extremely well behaved and used to dogs, but this could easily get me chucked off, horse bolting, or the dog being trodden on or kicked (which is going to be pretty lethal on an 18hh horse). These dog owners usually look terribly affronted and shocked when I shout for them to call their dog off NOW. No, it's not funny or cute. It's fucking dangerous. No issues at all with loose dogs if they stay clear. Some people are just stupid unfortunately!

YouTheCat · 20/04/2015 16:27

My severely autistic ds (who's 20) is very very afraid of dogs. He will shy away from those on leads.

Twice whilst out his carers have had to call the police to help them get him safely out of the way of dogs off leads because of ignorant dog owners who think it's okay because their dog is just being friendly. My ds cannot tell that a dog is being friendly. He sees a large animal with teeth bounding towards him and goes into panic mode which involves a violent meltdown. Not nice for him. Not nice for his carers. And totally avoidable.

Wroguewriter · 20/04/2015 16:38

I want to give the other side of the coin a bit here, I have a bouncy puppy who is 7 months old and is very friendly. I am very conscious of trying to keep him under control and not to bounce up to everyone but I have found the vast majority of people when out walking are keen to say hello and love making a fuss of him.
He just wants to be everyone's friend and as a small cockapoo is very cute which works in his favour. However this makes it much harder to train him to ignore other people and dogs!
i have been surprised at just how friendly other people are and really like seeing other people enjoying meeting my dog. There are more dog lovers out there than I knew about!

maddiehayesfan · 20/04/2015 16:42

"That said, if this is known as an area where people let their dogs off the lead (which it does seem to be) and you're afraid of dogs, wouldn't it be simpler to jog elsewhere?"

Could you suggest where Maddie?

Pavements? Residential areas? There are plenty of places where dogs aren't routinely off their leads. I'm not saying I agree - like I said, my personal opinion is that dogs should be leashed at all times, but if you're afraid of dogs, it seems a bit daft to go somewhere that they are routinely off-leash.

FFSletmechangemyname · 20/04/2015 16:43

Yanbu, I have a dog that as a young dog isn't very good with recall, so you know what? She stays on the lead at all times when we are out.

Last week I took her for a run along the beach (I ran she was on lead ) and I had a wet dog follow us for miles, in the end I had to turn back as I feared I would end up with a the dog forever.

The owner had no recall at all and thought it was funny, well it wasn't it ruined our run and shouldn't happen, if you cannot control your dog do not let it off the lead.

And if your dog needs a run then run with it on the lead, it's good exercise.Smile

Original poster
Model5 · 20/04/2015 16:43

Maybe Maddie, but that means I can't ever run anywhere beautiful. Running in the countryside is good for you in a whole other way than running on pavements.

OP posts:
GraysAnalogy · 20/04/2015 16:56

YANBU and I would be mortified and very apologetic if my dog did that.

He doesn't jump up at people, plus I leash him when I see people coming.

I do find it annoying though when I'm giving him a run off lead in a big field and someone traipses straight across and then isn't pleased that i've not recalled him or gone to him quickly enough to stop him walking alongside them

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