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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

neighbour query... wwyd?

87 replies

hopeforthebestplanfortheworst · 19/04/2015 14:17

My new (ish) neighbour has painted her side of the boundary panels between us, which I own, without asking or checking.

Should I say something in a friendly way to mention she should've checked as it's mine, or leave it? It can't be undone so it's more about getting her to remember to consider my property in future.

I don't want to fall out but nor do I want her to do anything irreversible which could be more serious or annoying in the future. I would never dream of doing such a thing without asking & think its a bit rude!?

OP posts:

IcecreamSkoda · 19/04/2015 20:37

Chunky fences may or may not be on the border of a property. Generally fences are completely on the property of the person who owns the fence. Just as you are not allowed to paint your neighbours fence (unless you ask first) you are not allowed to build something on their property. Some fences are shared and some are built on the actual border - it depends what it says in the deeds etc.
As for the suggestion of erecting your own fence on your own land if your neighbour refuses you permission to paint their fence it may seem a bit daft but it does happen especially if a neighbour refuses to repair a delapidated fence. It's not generally a good idea though as it can muddle any future disputes over where the actual border is. If you don't believe me check out the zillions of threads on the Garden Law website. If you think Mumsnet is full of loons you are in for a surprise

I still don't get the problem with asking your neighbours permission before you paint their fence.

Leonas · 19/04/2015 21:03

My neighbour helpfully bought us paint for our side of the fence to make sure it all matched - think he is quite disappointed that said paint (which we paid him for!) is still unopened in the shed. It is on the to do list though...

Silvercatowner · 19/04/2015 21:28

It honestly wouldn't occur to me to ask, and I'd be amazed to be asked. I see it similar to overhanging tree branches..... ours by default.

RosesareSublime · 19/04/2015 21:33

Its very tricky, I have to admit I only knew about fences and ownership after living in house for 10 years and we have long gardens and loads of fences.

It might be best to keep this one in the bag, and pull it out for future. IE I never mentioned fence but ...

If it hasnt seeped to your side and its not actually affecting you, I would leave it.

But legally NO, she cant put anything up against it and so on, nor paint it. But I also think its unfair to have people live with fences they dislike, its great if a compromise can be reached.

RosesareSublime · 19/04/2015 21:34

sorry meant to say - I would have innocently painted fence and never knew or considered it to be wrong.

IcecreamSkoda · 19/04/2015 21:39

SilverCatOwner....actually you don't own any of your neighbours overhanging branches either. You can cut them off where they encroach your property but legally you are meant to offer the branches back to your neighbour.

True fact

ipadmad · 19/04/2015 21:43

I wouldn't say a thing - and in the nicest possible way, I think you're being a bit sensitive about it. Your neighbour has to look at the fence, you would expect her to paint it wouldn't you? We have a shared fence with our neighbour, but we didn't consult each other when we each painted it our respective colours.

Life's short, get over it and relax

Silvercatowner · 19/04/2015 21:50

I'm glad I live in the real world rather than the MN world.

AtomicDog · 19/04/2015 21:54

Isn't anyone else curious about what material this non-wood, paintable fence is made of?

I am quite desperate to know!

Dionysuss · 19/04/2015 21:57

For an easy life I would let it go.
Pil fell out with their neighbour over the fence. Their long garden has the backs of several along one side. A dog kept jumping over into their garden. The owner told mil she had to make her fence taller. Mil told her to bugger off and control her animals. They now have big metal construction fences leaning on the fence along their patio. Tis an eyesore.

Vingtdeux22 · 19/04/2015 21:59

What a great neighbour, wish she lived next door to me.

BlackeyedSusan · 19/04/2015 22:00

just as you do not paint any other property that belongs to a neighbour, you do not paint their fence, even if you have to look at it. it belongs to someone else.

I don't get why there is a mumsnet exemption on one type of property.

steppemum · 19/04/2015 22:07

I know that technically and legally the fence is yours, and mn is very hot on how the fence is yours and you have rights to it and no-one should touch it.

But I think in real life most people do put things on the fence facing their garden and /or paints it and no-one thinks twice about it.

I think I would ignore unless she started attaching wires to it, and then if you thought it would reduce the life of the fence you could say something.

mangoespadrille · 19/04/2015 22:07

The house next to my mum's was empty for a while. When the new neighbours eventually moved in, the grass was very long. They didn't have a mower, so they decided to burn it down...along with my mum's fence. Think yourself lucky!

Pangurban · 19/04/2015 22:34

But is it inside their garden? Sometimes a fence can be erected entirely on the owners land and the boundary (imaginary line) is the other side of that. It may not be along the boundary line, but entirely on the owner's side.

In that case the person next to them would be interfering with a structure entirely within the owner's property. Is that transgressing the boundary as much as reaching over the fence?

Original poster

hopeforthebestplanfortheworst · 19/04/2015 23:08

AtomicDog: its decorative concrete panels with concrete posts. Sleep easy now :-)

I was out when it happened.

It is definitely owned by me. So it's on my land. But I wouldn't want to get pedantic about that, it's the worry of not being considered / consulted over something I thought was a given & whether it's a forewarning of potential trouble if I don't nicely stake my point of view iykwim.

OP posts:

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 19/04/2015 23:38

Concrete? So paint isn't likely to seep through?

Can you actually seeing from your side?

AtomicDog · 20/04/2015 00:31

Thank you!

DamnBamboo · 20/04/2015 00:41

The ownership of a boundary fence is to do with who replaces it if it is blown down, nothing to do with what you do on your side of it

Rubbish! If you own the fence, you own the fence.
You can stop someone putting trellis against it or doing any number of other things, not to say you should.

But if you own it, you own it! What illogical argument could one have to say 'it's blown down, you own it and must replace it, but BTW, I'll just paint it, hang things on it etc.. in the meantime'

FWIW, fences are not a legal requirement under most circumstances either.

OP, YANBU.

musicalendorphins2 · 20/04/2015 01:21

YANBU! I'd be so pissed off. How would they like it if you painted something of theirs? The uncivilized way would be to go around and paint it with some tacky colours and graffiti or religious type art and sayings. But what I'd do is look up some local companies and get some quotes on removing the paint, www.ehow.co.uk/how_4967672_sandblast-paint.html
www.contractortalk.com/f95/removing-paint-concrete-87484/ then go over to your neighbors and explain that it is your wall and you don't want it painted, you really wish they had asked you first, because now you will be getting it removed and expect them to pay the bill. They can remove anything else they stuck on without asking while they are at it.

sykadelic · 20/04/2015 02:17

If our neighbour painted the side of MY fence that faces their property to say I'd be pissed is an understatement.

OP I would mention: "I saw you painted my fence! The paint can stay but unfortunately you'll need to remove the screws and fill the holes. The contractor I paid to install the fence advised holes in the fence weaken it because it allows water to seep in."

I would only mention it though if you can do something about it if she doesn't follow what you said. SO I would investigate options for enforcing your rights. With my fence it would be vandalism because there is no doubt my fence is my fence. I paid for it, I applied for the permit, it's on my property.

sykadelic · 20/04/2015 02:33

Our back fence/boundary is actually made up of the neighbours fence AND garage and it's on the boundary line. Given some of the responses here I should just paint the garage and fence on my side because it's on the boundary and facing into our garden... oh wait.. it's NOT MY PROPERTY!!

I just can't believe some of the responses here are how it's not the OP's fence and that their neighbour can do what they like with the side that faces them. What if my house were on the boundary line? Would they be allowed to paint that side of the house? No? Of bloody course not!!

Whether you care for her painting it or not there if definitely no doubt she should have asked first.

The nicest way is probably to say: "I just wanted to find out what kind of paid you used and check you didn't actually drill into my fence. The contractor I paid to install it was very specific about what could and could not be done to it".

Silvercatowner · 20/04/2015 06:47

What if my house were on the boundary line? Would they be allowed to paint that side of the house?

I must live in a parallel universe. Why on earth would this be an issue? Wouldn't bother me and wouldn't bother any of my neighbours.

Collaborate · 20/04/2015 07:15

So, Silvercatowner, you'd be happy for your neighbour to paint the gable wall of your house in a colour of their choosing? Most bizarre.
OP - YANBU. I'd mention something for future reference. Presumably you can remove the panels to check they've not drilled holes in it.

ItsNotTrueThough · 20/04/2015 09:04

silverCatOwner. If you and your neighbours are all so cool and laid back why wouldn't you just check with them before you painted their property?

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