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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

State of Neighbours house

37 replies

Loandbehold · 17/04/2015 14:23

My next door neighbours are a normal, nice, professional couple. However, their house is a tip - almost like one of those from Channel 4 like 'hoarders next door' or that Kim and Aggie visit, but not quite at that level IYSWIM. My DS plays well with their DS, I try and encourage the play to be in our house or outside (if it is nice) but it is hard to avoid him being in their house from time to time. Would you find this ok? Would you worry? Or should I just ignore.

OP posts:
lalalonglegs · 17/04/2015 14:34

I'd ignore - unless there is poo over the surfaces or something, I don't know why your child would be more in danger from indoors dirt than outdoors dirt Confused.

0x530x610x750x630x79 · 17/04/2015 14:38

I don't know why your child would be more in danger from indoors dirt than outdoors dirt confused

my thoughts exactly, maybe the heat indoors encourages the growth of nastier bacteria Grin

cinders456 · 17/04/2015 14:38

Is it clutter or filth?

cinders456 · 17/04/2015 14:46

Actually, that's prob a bit of a silly question! I meant, do you think it's just surface clutter, or filthy too?

Loandbehold · 17/04/2015 14:48

It is both clutter and filth. I don't worry about the bacteria so much. But would you be happy with your kid playing in a rubbish dump?

OP posts:
cinders456 · 17/04/2015 14:52

Have you been round there? Filth, as in never cleaned? Or slightly grubby? No, I wouldn't be happy about it

Icimoi · 17/04/2015 14:54

But what sort of filth? If we're talking dust and cobwebs, I wouldn't be bothered. If we're talking poo and worse, then I would.

cinders456 · 17/04/2015 14:54

But, I guess you have to weigh it up and judge whether your ds is at risk, or if it's just unpleasant.

cinders456 · 17/04/2015 14:56

Agree with icimoi

Stringmeupscotty · 17/04/2015 14:58

When I was about 9-10, I used to have a friend who lived in squalor, I mean proper squalor. Her mum used to just lie in bed all day and leave the five kids to fend for themselves.

My mum didn't stop me playing in their house as such but would try to discourage me IYSWIM. If I did go playing in their house, my mum used to bath me in Dettol when I came home and scrub me with anti-bac soap until I was red raw.

rebelfor · 17/04/2015 15:00

Do they have fruit?

cleanmyhouse · 17/04/2015 15:35

Haha rebelfor

lalalonglegs · 17/04/2015 16:14

Again, unless your child was in danger of being crushed by the clutter, I'd ignore (that's not to say I wouldn't raise an eyebrow at the way they keep their home but I bet children have lots of fun there without having yo worry about making a mess).

NataliaBaker · 17/04/2015 16:18

If it's a proper hoarder house, I'd say YANBU because of the likelihood of mice, rats and all things associated with that.

If it's just clutter and you're exaggerating a fair bit, I'd say YABU.

Pootles2010 · 17/04/2015 16:20

My sisters house is I guess what people call squalor - bird shit everywhere, filth and clutter. She isn't capable of cleaning up say, broken glass properly - she'd try, but it wouldn't be properly done. You have to move a lot of stuff to sit down anywhere.

I wouldn't let DS go there on his own - I go with him on the very rare occasion we go, and watch him like a hawk. Sadly some people do live like that.

saoirse31 · 17/04/2015 16:24

Impossible to say without you giving a proper description.

IssyStark · 17/04/2015 16:30

There's a big difference between dirt adn clutter as others have said. There is also a huge difference in people's perception of clutter (as you can see on any thread about couples with different tolerence levels for 'mess'), not to mention a difference in toleration for other stuff such as whether you keep a cat litter tray inside or not.

Unless it is absolutely stinking of filth, or the boxes of clutter are towered up unsafely, then I wouldn't worry.

NataliaBaker · 17/04/2015 17:00

You should google the clutter rating pics or whatever they are called and report back OP. Grin Tell us where they rate.

TheListingAttic · 17/04/2015 17:03

Perhaps I'm wrong, but if they seem professional - i.e. presentable and not unkempt or dirty themselves, then I'd suggest the house can't be so bad it's a hazard. If they're able to wash and keep clothes clean, I'm assuming the house is only (merely!) grubby and untidy, not actually maggot-ridden and festering. In which case I'd forget it, and just make sure I gave my kid a brisk wipe-down when they got home.

0x530x610x750x630x79 · 17/04/2015 17:10

on this scale i wouldn't be worried about anything upto (and including) 5. No room to play at 6 and above.
www.wnyc.org/story/36249-cant-let-go/

PlaydohInTheCarpet · 17/04/2015 17:18

I never knew there was a clutter rating! Grin

Op, where abouts in the scale is it?

NataliaBaker · 17/04/2015 17:32

Crikey, you're chilled 0x530! I wouldn't be pleased with three or above.

woowoo22 · 17/04/2015 17:33

I would worry if there are pet droppings/manky kitchen.

TheresACatInMeKitchen · 17/04/2015 17:34

Where abouts on the scale is it?

I'd also not have a problem up to a 5 or possibly a 6. I have no problem with untidy/cluttered but if there's so much stuff that its bordering on dangerous and it cant be cleaned then would start to have an issue.

Skiptonlass · 17/04/2015 17:35

I feel much better about my lax housework after looking at those clutter images ....