AIBU 9 & 7 yr olds shouldn't ge left alone??

[eeyoreandpooh]

AMIBU to think it's not right to leave a 9yr old and 7yr old alone playing in a park while you go to the shop? Said shop is a car drive away - not just round the corner or over the road

Arf at people who'd leave them.at home but not in the park. Most accidents happen in the home.

At home, my 9 yr old wouldn't move from the sofa where she would be watching minecraft videos on her ipad. I know because she has been in exactly the same position when I return from Waitrose as she was when I left. I still wouldn't leave her there alone though.

If you leave them somewhere and go elsewhere, there is the added risk that something happens to you - car accident, caught up in traffic and delayed considerably, abducted by aliens etc.

Yes Bee - there had been a couple of stranger danger incidents with what was always referred to as a 'funny man hanging around'.
I too,was in a quite average suburban estate in a town.

I really can't imagine anyone being interested in who was the 'supervising adult' if a child fell off a climbing frame. Surely it' fairly normal for 7-9 year olds to be unsupervised in a park. Not all parks, not all kids, but within the normal range all the same. My 6yo came home with grazed knees from falling off the monkey bars only yesterday. The 20 questions in A&E are to see if the arm was broken in an climbing frame accident as stated or if the child was assaulted, no to inform SS that mummy wasn't standing under the climbing frame with a crash mat.

I may not be standing under the climbing frame with a crash mat but I would be nearby keeping an eye on my child.

Me sitting nearby doesn't affect my child being able to play with his friends or make new ones.

I used to live in a lower/middle/upper school areas. Middle school,children always walked to school by themselves. Ie. Year 5 /10 years old. These children seem to grow up and become more independent than children who move to senior school in year 7.

yabu
if they are sensible why not?

dc (8yo) sometimes walks to the park together with same age friend and come back covered in mud when they are hungry.

The 20 questions in A&E are to see if the arm was broken in an climbing frame accident as stated or if the child was assaulted, no to inform SS that mummy wasn't standing under the climbing frame with a crash mat.

I doubt that is the case if a child arrives in A&E having been found injured and alone at a playground with no responsible adult to be found.

I didn't helicopter parent mine when they were little, eg I let them roam free round the huge adventure playground at a local children's farm, but I was always on site if something went wrong and they knew exactly where I was. They also played out the front with a strict roaming limit.

I wouldn't personally. Imagine if something happened, to the 7 year old for example. I think it would look pretty crappy that there was only a 9 year old sibling to look after them. I wouldn't risk it!

Too young at that age to be left alone anywhere and older siblings shouldnt be left in charge of younger ones, that's the parents job.

I think it's fine.

But then I'm a very lax parent by MNs standards.

If your child got hurt and you weren't there you could very well be charged with neglect or abandonment.

Soooo I shouldn't let my 12yo go to the park with his mates? He could still fall over and break his arm? How about my 15 yo, who leaves school in a few months? He could still be hurt in an accident and tbh, even if I was there, a small child could fall out of a climbing frame.

Happened to a friend, her DS fell out of the cl frame in their back garden and broke his arm. I don't believe SS got involved . Does it make a difference if she was there? If so, why?

BTW I am not saying I would leave the 9yo and 7yo at the park in the OP's scenario - it depends if they were far from home and had a key to get in, for example. If not, then I am less keen - what if they get fed up or it starts to rain? (a bit more likely than the accident/abductor scenarios)

YANBU not at all, these are still relatively young children and they should not be left alone, whether that be at the park or at home. Too many people sadly just don't give a damn about their kids, and they'll dump them anywhere so that they can go off doing other things.

Twoplus you're absolutely right. And then they moan on MN when given a hard time about it.

The point isn't that the parent is there to prevent them falling off the climbing frame. Of course that will, in most cases, happen when you're in the house/reading a book/chatting to a friend.

The point is that if something traumatic happens to the child; is their first thought "mom/help is over there", or additional stress, pain and fear from not knowing what to do or where to go to for help.

I plan to let my children have as much freedom as I can, but I see my biggest role as a parent to not necessarily prevent problems, but to always be there when things go wrong, whether they're 5 or 55.

Are you seriously lumping people who allow the their kids to play put. like kids have some from.much younger ages for centuries, with people who dump their kids on everyone.

Kids play out. leave those happy to do it alone and your kids are welcome to sit on front of screens all afternoon if you so wish

The alternative to 9 and 7 year olds playing out alone is 9 and 7 year olds playing out with a parent at hand- not sitting in front of a screen!!

My 14 yr old took my 7 yr old too the park and the 7 yr old broke his arm. Hospital didn't make references to who was there and ss never called.

Sorry soupdragon and singsongsung but you are wrong about social services. Unless you live in an exceptionally 'quiet' area, social services will be struggling to cope with all the DV, EA, child abuse cases etc. One child breaking their arm certainly wouldn't meet the threshold even if adult temporarily absent where I work.

So are you saying I'm wrong on my interpretation of the law or just that parents will likely get away with it because SS are stretched?

FWIW, my child fell out of a climbing frame and broke his arm when I was about two feet away from him. I don't exert some kind of magical protective forcefield over him.

really? we've leaped to Social Services coming round because somehow a child broke their arm whilst in the park and got themselves to A&E unaccompanied? Really?

Do we think that children in a park where there is a parent present never break their arms?

They could go to the park on their own at that age. Mine do. What is the difference between them going to the park with their friends and the mum popping off for five minutes?

#soMuchDrama

"get away with it"

so much drama and excitement

How times have changed. playing out was the done thing when I was young. We were called in for tea. We spent hours riding bikes, climbing trees, fishing In brooks, playing with kids in the neighbourhood. We'd all walk.in and out if neighbours houses for drinks and off back our we went.

now SS involvement is needed apparently cos a kid got injured being a kid doing normal kid things.

who's parents would have honestly given it a second thought to leaving kids that age in a park for a few mins while nipping to the shops.

Social Service sin the eyes of MN Posters:
MNuser#12838: "I'd like to report child abuse. A child might have got hurt whilst at a park."
SS Worker: "Oh, my, a child got hurt once? Call in the SWAT team, drag the child away, there's clearly abuse and neglect. this is obviously a child At Risk."
MNuser#12838: "Excellent, I knew I wasn't BU or over reacting at all."

Social Services in reality:
SS Worker: