To be peed off with these mothers at the zoo today?

[dillydottydally]

We went to the zoo today. I was half dreading it being school holidays and all but was actually having a really good day. Whilst DS was playing in the massive playground DP had the beginnings of a headache. Thinking the heat may be part of the problem (he is ginger and can burn at the merest hint of the sun) we headed to a covered seating area. Along one wall were lockers to store your stuff when using the soft play next door.

We sat down then couldn't help but notice a group of mums and their daughters. There were about six girls between about 2 - 5 years old. For about 25 mins the mothers sat down happily watching the girls slamming the locker doors. They were shutting each other in the lockers and banging the doors. This wasn't just once or twice, it was constant.

All the other families were sitting at tables having drinks, chatting etc. They were totally oblivious to the risk of one of the kids hurting themselves and the annoyance of everyone else in the room.

I'm a long time lurker but thought I was safe posting this as surely I am not being unreasonable in finding this rude and irritating?

Massively annoying, yes.

Worth starting a thread over? Hardly.

I'd be embarrassed if my child was behaving like this, but being honest, on a bad day, I probably have allowed it.

I see other people parenting their children appallingly (way worse than perfect me ) all the time. Is it worthy of a thread? Really, really not.

Chalk it up, move on.

It is annoying, but they had six children age 2+ at a zoo with a softplay, I imagine they had spent all day saying "calm the fuck down" and had given up.

"Everyone who has three children will understand those mothers". Sorry, ubik - I have three children, and I do not understand these mothers. There is no way I would have let my three behave this way.

And I equally do not understand people who have to come onto a thread about a minor incident to tell the OP that they shouldn't have started a thread about something so trivial.

Seriously, people? Do you only EVER discuss matters of Great Importance? Do you never mention a minor, slightly annoying incident that you witnessed or that happened to you, to a friend? You really only ever have weighty intellectual discussions.

I see nothing wrong with a casual discussion of a minor incident on Talk boards like these - it is just like the casual discussions we all have with friends at the pub or over coffee.

If you don't want to partake in discussions like this, why bother commenting? Why do anything more than glance at the OP, or even just the title of the thread, and decide to click away from it?

It seems to me that some people actively look for threads that they think are too trivial, so that they can comment about how trivial they think the thread is (and by implication, how much more intellectual they are - because the discussion is so 'beneath' them). Why bother? Why not just move on to another thread that interests you more?

my sister deals with these things well, she is tiny - teeny tiny and "little-old-ladyish" so it works - she puts her posh voice on and goes to ask the parents "would you please kindly control your FUCKING children"

she has 5 of her own.

my sister deals with these things well, she is tiny - teeny tiny and "little-old-ladyish" so it works - she puts her posh voice on and goes to ask the parents "would you please kindly control your FUCKING children"

Is it her teeny tiny size which makes her so cocky, then?
I'd take serious umbrage at anyone talking about my 'FUCKING children', to be honest.

OP you can start any thread you like!30+ so far people were sufficiently interested to click on.

Maybe the mean irritated posters were also in the noisy zoo today and have headaches.

Yanbu...I would have had to leave in case I said what the teeny sister says!

The mothers themselves apparently didn't find the children irritating (or presumably they would have told them to stop) so it probably didn't occur to them that anyone else might.

To them it was just children in a child-friendly place having fun. If it was a big problem for you, you either needed to ask them politely or leave.

Somewhere if your sister spoke to me like that I would not "control my fucking children." If she asked politely I would get them to moderate theur behaviour, but I don't respond to rudeness.

Not that my children's behaviour generally needs moderating, I do get them to be considerate of others when we're out. No one's ever asked me politely or otherwise to control them, or given me exasperated looks about them.

I'd respond by telling her to control her scumbag mouth.

I think unnecessary noise levels should be kept down, slamming, banging etc, but some children do seem more capable than others and don't injure themselves.

I don't like wanton damage, though.

I got sick of being told "she might fall, trap her fingers, run into the road" etc, or "she'll never learn to sit still" and other such shit, I think it's why a lot of girls lack physical confidence.

I think unnecessary noise levels should be kept down, slamming, banging etc, but some children do seem more capable than others and don't injure themselves.

I don't like wanton damage, though.

I agree with this ^^

Many MNers here are condoning this 'wanton damage' though. Is this how mothers do things now?

This happens alot at my DS's swimming club. The parents have to wait for the children near the showers in the changing rooms so it is incredibly hot and stuffy. A lot of the younger siblings climb into the lockers why you are waiting- my DD used to do this a lot when she was 1-2 as did other toddlers. It was never for that long but despite telling them everyone had the same problem in stopping them mainly because it was so hot to struggle with them. What I actually found more offensive and grating was the very strict Mum that was always berating her children and having to listen to the wailing and her shouting in this heated/squashed area!

Telling off her toddler for climbing in the locker that is.

meh

Ohhhhh so you let them run riot cos it's a bit hot!? I see!

How do you cope in summer? How do mums in aus/Africa cope?

somewhere if your charming sister spoke to me like that I would tell her to wind her neck in.

YANBU It would annoy the hell out of me but unless I had the rage about something or PMT I wouldn't have said anything.

I would not let my DC do that and think the parents were BU in letting this happen.

I wouldn't call it a riot and it isn't a 'private' sports club. It is really, really hot, suffocatingly so.

My Dad works in Ghana and knows lots of Ghanian families- the difference is that such families are used to the heat so this would not add to their stress levels when dealing with their children.

Sorry Ghanaian not 'Ghanian'

I think SomewhereIBelong's teeny tiny sister would probably get a teeny tiny punch in the face from some of the parents around here...

At the swimming pool kids get bored waiting with nothing to do so are more likely to play up, not that it makes it okay to stress everyone else. Yesterday there was a full soft play area to one side and masses of outdoor play equipment on the other side. Why would you not make use of it but prefer to let the kids bang lockers for ages instead? It was over fifty quid for a family of three, they could have banged the lockers at their local swimming pool for a fraction of the price

Still you will all be glad to know that I've put the whole traumatic incident behind me today

I epically bawled someone's kid out for doing this after a particularly fractious day at Centre parcs.

Anybody who has experience CP changing area and the noise and then one kid SLAMMING and SLAMMING a the same door 50 times will understand.

You could have heard a pin drop when I finished.

Yes I agree that sounds a bit wasteful of their time considering what was available.

I'm the person who, after waiting a little while forthe parents to actually parent, would have directly spoken to the child about the noise and potential damage to property.

If there was a reaction from the parents, I would have escalated to staff. This wasn't a minor thing, it was inconsiderate behaviour to everyone there by parents who were condoning possible deliberate damage of someone else's property. It is worrying that so many people see this as ok. The same people who would moan about damaged lockers and equipment and any increased costs to cover replacement.

Multiple children, the weather or boredom do not excuse deliberate wilful damage or an absence of basic consideration and manners towards other people by both children and parents.