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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour issue

36 replies

Pipsqueak11 · 08/04/2015 01:42

Just want to check what you think about this scenario - we live in the burbs fairly quiet area - our house has large garden but loads of trees . We gave dd aged 12 a trampoline for her birthday and only place it will fit is at side of our garden next to neighbours low ish fence . Neighbour has dd similar age to ours and we have said to her parents. she can use it whenever she fancies if she likes . Neighbour has had complete hissy fit because of where we have sited the trampoline - apparently it is noisy . She has decided we are a noisy family because we have used a chain saw x2 in 3 years to cut up logs .they have a dog that barks almost continuously which drives us and rest of street bonkers but we have not complained in interests of good neighbourly relations . Feeling very sad as hate falling out with people but so shocked to be spoken to aggressively by neighbour and now feeling angry too as it has taken away the pleasure of dd birthday pressie AIBU and WWYD?
Can't sleep as fretting about it :(

OP posts:
TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 08/04/2015 01:47

Fuck em. You've been perfectly reasonable and they still can't rub along.

Stop trying and just suit yourself. They're not moderating their behaviour to suit you.

WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat · 08/04/2015 01:52

Yup, the trampoline is in your garden, not theirs. And as long as your dd isn't on it screaming and shouting at 07:00 or 23:00, then she's not harming anyone. When they moaned at you I'd have been tempted to bring up their noisy dog.

As above, just ignore and get on with things - they sound unpleasant.

Original poster
Pipsqueak11 · 08/04/2015 04:50

Thanks both for your reply an helpful advice . glad it's not me misreading signs . I was so shocked by her outburst I didn't think quickly enough iof the great MN responses i should have used !

OP posts:
KoalaDownUnder · 08/04/2015 05:55

Hmmm, I think you are probably NBU, but more info needed:

  • what time does your DD bounce?
  • how close is it to, say, their bedroom windows?

And most importantly (and interestingly) - what exactly did she say to you?!

cathpip · 08/04/2015 06:10

As long as she's not screaming whilst on it and it's not too early or too late, next time the neighbours complain about it being noisy, I would just say "while your on the subject about noise, do you want to do something about your dog and it's barking" then smile sweetly and walk away. A barking dog is more irritating IMO than a child enjoying a trampoline.

StoorieHoose · 08/04/2015 06:14

Having had the neighbours trampoline right next to our fence overlooking our patio doors and under our bedroom window I'm going to to say move the trampoline. It's a complete pain in the chuff - did you not take into consideration where you were going to site said trampoline before you bought it?

wheresthelight · 08/04/2015 06:27

torn here - if it's possible to move the trampoline I would consider it but as the poster above asked how close is it to their house? as long as a fair distance and you can't hear it in yours then I would leave ot and ignore her.

wowfudge · 08/04/2015 07:04

Move the trampoline if at all possible. Imagine what it must be like to be sitting in your garden and the next door neighbour's child's head keeps popping up over the fence with every bounce! I think they've said their complaint is about the noise rather than the effect on their privacy tbh.

nunkspugget · 08/04/2015 07:31

Funny how these trampolines only ever fit far away from the owners house but crammed right up against the neighbours. I bet you there's room elsewhere but it inconveniences you. I hate the bloody things!!!

BasinHaircut · 08/04/2015 07:36

YABU to have put it right up against the neighbours low fence. It will create a complete lack of privacy for them. Unless your garden is actually a forest, there must be some other place it could go?

AnyFucker · 08/04/2015 07:39

see you in A+E when your dc break their arm/leg

sandgrown · 08/04/2015 07:41

We only have a small garden with one small spot that gets the sun. The one behind is much bigger but they have the trampoline next to the fence. They have trees which mean we don't see the children much but it is quite disconcerting if I sit out on a nice day and they are bouncing a couple of feet away from me. They often have friends round and it is noisy then though it is just the sound of the kids enjoying themselves.

Meechimoo · 08/04/2015 07:42

When the safety enclosure on our 10 ft trampoline died I didn't bother getting a new one. We got rid of the trampoline.
(Because I got heartily fucked off with reminding my kids all the time not to scream on it and only to go on one at a time. And then there was the trip to A&E on account of the fucking thing)

FarFromAnyRoad · 08/04/2015 08:29

I agree that these things are a complete pain. There's one next door to me - yes right by the fence. It's been cast aside in favour of other things and is now just an unsightly half deconstructed eyesore. Is it ever going to get scrapped? I doubt it. Was a pain when it was being used and its a pain now.

ajandjjmum · 08/04/2015 08:37

Move the trampoline to another side of the garden, then ask them when they're going to move the dog!!!

Phoenixashes · 08/04/2015 08:40

They are complaining about a trampoline and yet they have a dog that barks constantly.....Hmm.

bananayellow · 08/04/2015 08:42

When they next moan, I'd come back with a comment about the dog noise.

I'd move it if you could though, as they are noisy.

Original poster
Pipsqueak11 · 08/04/2015 09:14

Thanks everyone for your perspective ( apart from any fucker) !! To answer your questions it is at the bottom of a longish garden . I'm not very good at measurements but I would say around 30 yards from their house and definitely does not overlook their windows / patio etc as too far away. Dd only bounces after school about 30 mins and then at weekend but about the same time as knackering . She does not shriek whilst doing it . Not had pals round yet but can see that could get a bit noisier . I think it is the boing of the springs they are objecting to as apparently it upsets their dog ! Meanwhile Dd is loving it and as a non sporty Girl she is benefitting hugely from exercise . I can see a difference already . I'm still thinking about what to say about their dog / last few nights they have locked it in the car at front of house for an hour or so presumably to get some respite themselves , not sure if it's an rspca issue really - I will see how it goes - I could always look at cutting down one of the trees but would prefer not to snd it will involve NOISE!!

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 08/04/2015 09:18

around 30 yards from their house

And how far from your house?

ElsieMc · 08/04/2015 09:27

We had a trampoline in the garden and the kids did not scream when using it. We are next to a courtyard of second home owners and serial complainers and they actually did not complain about this. But they complained about the hedge we planted to protect their privacy because they wanted to look out across our garden!

We did move the trampoline around as the lawn tends to die off underneath.

You really do need to speak to them about their dog as it is completely unacceptable - in the way they are treating it and they way it is allowed to affect everyone's quality of life. They are selfish arses.

TedAndLola · 08/04/2015 09:33

I can imagine the repetitive squeak of the springs would be irritating. Regular, repetitive noises (like the bass thump of music) are often worse than 'organic' noises. I'd say half an hour a day is fine but if she's doing it for hours at weekends, they wouldn't be unreasonable to get fed up with it. I don't agree with the general mumsnet consensus that we should let our kids make as much noise as they like because they're kids, and it's our neighbours' fault for living next to us.

It sounds like you've been as considerate as possible, I'd just limit the amount of time she spends on it at weekends.

Pangurban · 08/04/2015 09:34

Poor dog being locked in the car is horrible and dangerous. Maybe they need someone from some animal welfare group to speak to them. Is it on it's own a lot and that's why it's barking?

Original poster
Pipsqueak11 · 08/04/2015 09:34

Sorry a bit of Misinformation in post above - I thought doggie in car was recent thing but apparently they have been doing this for quite some time around 7- 8 pm presumably when trying to get their younger ones off to sleep .i didn't want to give impression doggie in car related to trampoline as that's not the case - totally unconnected .

OP posts:
Icimoi · 08/04/2015 09:37

I wouldn't have thought it a good idea to have a trampoline next to a fence anyway - if a child falls the wrong way it could lead to serious injuries.

Original poster
Pipsqueak11 · 08/04/2015 09:44

To answer earlier question trampoline is same distance from our house ie around 30 yards . Can't hear it at all in the house and do hear a boing / spring sound when in garden .
Yes am a bit worried about their dog issue but don't want to give impression of tit for tat complaining as will just escalate I fear. We are going away now til next week so will ponder over it whilst away . We are considerate neighbours . For example There is a ghastly out of control shrub type thing at the front of the house between our drives on our side . I wanted to cut it down and mentioned it to them to check ok and they said they preferred it to be left as offered some shade to a room on that side of their house - so we have left it and I have this Bloody awful thing to look at out of my kitchen window every day just to avoid upsetting them , does that give a flavour of my mindset? Very much a peacemaker but it's my garden ffs!!

OP posts: