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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think 60 is old aged

430 replies

Goodtimes80 · 07/04/2015 17:14

And 35 Middle aged?

OP posts:
Latara · 08/04/2015 08:20

Yes I think health has a lot to do with it.

I will be working until I'm 67 (or older) because I have a 35 yr mortgage, I hope my health holds out.

ragged · 08/04/2015 08:32

No Health Does Not have a lot to do with it.
Because Old Does Not Equal Unhealthy.
Old Does Not Equal Ugly Skin.
Old Does not Equal Past It.

ARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

I'l hide thread now. People are determined to trot out every prejudice possible against age.

MagentaOeuflon · 08/04/2015 08:41

But I think it's just a fact that there's a very late stage of life, for most people where you become frail and start to lose your independence, and many people associate "old" with that stage. Therefore if you're 60, 70 or even 80+ and not at that stage, you don't feel "old".

I agree the negative connotations of old are bad and there are some things where we are happy to say something is old - e.g. a very old house is often a matter of pride. It would be good if we saw ourselves more like that.

Inkanta · 08/04/2015 08:46

16 - 40 = young

40 - 65 = middle aged

65 -70 = the new 50

80 - 100 = elderly

Mehitabel6 · 08/04/2015 08:54

I am over 60yrs. If I live to the age of my FIL I have 39yrs 8 months to go. I am not going to be old all that time. I will be old when my health restricts my life.

drudgetrudy · 08/04/2015 09:34

I agree with Apple about a lot.
Old is just a description of age but a lot of negative attributes have been attached to it, so people resist being called old.

Apparently though I'm just a "stupid fucking baby boomer" so have reported her comment for ageism.

Apple--don't lump everyone in together-I accept I'm older than you and don't object to anyone saying so-but I don't fit a stereotype.

GoblinLittleOwl · 08/04/2015 09:41

Just watched Helen Mirren on TV; 70 next birthday; does she, or anyone else of her age, have to be labelled 'old-aged? She certainly doesn't care; what is the point?

Snottybiyatch · 08/04/2015 09:45

Totally agree with you Drudge I thought Apple spoke a LOT of sense but then ruined it with the baby boomer gem!

Inkanta · 08/04/2015 09:47

"Goblin" yes agree.

Joanna Lumley comes to mind as well. Youthful in and out.

Jackieharris · 08/04/2015 09:50

65+ is the cut off for a referral to our local authority's 'older adults' team.

I think once you hit 70 you just don't know how much time you have left. You could drop from a stroke or heart attack or get cancer and be gone within the year. Or you could live another 20 years. 2 members of my family have recently died fairly quickly at 70. So now I'd say that 35 is middle aged.

My parents and ILs are in their 60s and I don't assume they'll last more than another 10 years even though they are active & healthy.

Even once you get into your 40s it's not that rare (esp for men) to die suddenly. I don't think we should ever take life expectancy for granted.

Young is under 25. 25-35 is adult. 35+ is middle aged.

Back2Two · 08/04/2015 09:52

This reply has been withdrawn

This post has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns

sPJPPp · 08/04/2015 09:54

60 was classified as old for the boomers... Hell some retired in their 50s

The millianials will not be old until 80 and will probably still be working and have a shorter life expectancy.

MagentaOeuflon · 08/04/2015 10:03

Re middle-aged though, I kind of think of the starting point as not being the start of your life, but the start of your adulthood. Before you're 18, you're not really living your own life - you're not "young", you're a child or teenager.

So to me 20s and 30s is young. 40s and 50s is middle-aged. (I'm in my 40s and happy to be called middle aged.) 60s and 70s is getting on a bit/getting old. Actually old is 80+.

Birdsgottafly · 08/04/2015 10:24

""I think once you hit 70 you just don't know how much time you have left. You could drop from a stroke or heart attack or get cancer and be gone within the year. ""

Having worked In "Adult Disabilities" and been to lots of Consultant level appointments, I can say that Health doesn't work like that.

When I worked in Care, there were 60+ year olds still doing 14 hour shifts, on heavy Wards, Stroke Care etc.

These are people who look after their health, though. We'd have unfit 20+ year olds who wouldn't come back (Agency), because they could do the shift.

I agree it's more important to get rid of the bigotry and misconception around ageing, especially Female ageing (I think linked to everyday sexism).

My Mum retired at 65 and then became a Lolly Pop Lady until 80, it's hard going, early start, walking for nearly two hours, twice a day.

She didn't become "Elderly" until 83, but at 87 still lives on her own, with us supporting her, which I see more of in active, positive people.

I meet 30+ year olds, who depress the life out of me.

The weight training sessions I attend are attended by women 38+, but only because we are not then patronised, not because we are lifting less than younger people (men included).

The courses I attend are similar. I hope I will never want to stop learning or developing and yes, sex is/has got better.

Personally, age is irrelevant and I'm not going to allow anyone to label me.

Especially, as all my life, I've worked to remove the labels put on others, because of disability, culture, sexuality etc by others and themselves.

mariamin · 08/04/2015 10:30

35 to 45 is middle aged. Not many people live beyond 90 years of age.
At 60, lots of people have some health problems, although most look healthy.

mariamin · 08/04/2015 10:34

And everyone always talks about the health very elderly people they know on threads like this. My gran was like this. Very healthy until her nineties. But many many people are not. And yes, that includes people who have looked after their health. Like my 65 year old neighbour who has terminal cancer, and is a vegetarian, slim, non smoking sporty person.

SoupDragon · 08/04/2015 10:37

The only answer I can think of for the OP's question is another question "Who gives a fuck?"

And the answer to that is "A goady fucker"

m0therofdragons · 08/04/2015 10:43

Medically 65 plus is older aged.
my parents are 60 and 61 but very lively/young pil are 55 and mil behaves older than my 89yo grand mother! 89 yo grandmother was called an old lady the other day (in the context of "mind out, don't knock the old lady"). She was shocked as she'd never thought of herself as old. When my grandfather died at 80 she said "he wasn't even that old" which left dm and I looking confused and wondering what she she classed as old. Apparently it's 95 to her Grin

Gralick · 08/04/2015 10:44

No Health Does Not have a lot to do with it.
Because Old Does Not Equal Unhealthy.
Old Does Not Equal Ugly Skin.
Old Does not Equal Past It.

ARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

What ragged said, including the last bit Grin

I am OLD and PROUD.

I know a shitload more about almost everything than a 30 year old.
I look all right! I don't look young, but young isn't the only definition of pretty.
I'm not "past" anything, and neither are my parents.

I am unhealthy. This is because of my health, not my age. My parents (85) are fitter and more healthy than I am.

Old is OK. It's by no means a bad thing :)

Gralick · 08/04/2015 10:46

Grin YY, Soup.

JoffreyBaratheon · 08/04/2015 12:43

My grandad only lived to be 71, but til the year he died, he walked miles a day, worked part time even though he was retired and quite well off just to keep himself in the world, spent half the year in Ireland shark-fishing, and drove like a maniac. My dad made it to 82, and again, til months before he died, was travelling the world doing all the things he couldn't do when younger, still playing his music, and ran his local Age Concern and another charity, etc etc. I suppose it is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe the OP comes from a family where everyone acts like stereotypical 'pensioners' the day they hit 60. In my family, people seem to ignore the number and live their lives.

JoffreyBaratheon · 08/04/2015 12:46

Forgot to add, above but my hair started going grey when I was 16. I later got vitiligo which made it worse. About 18 months ago I stopped dyeing my hair for the first time since my 30s, (I'm 53) and now it is snow white. I keep thinking maybe I should dye it again as I still have 2 young-ish kids and don't want to be mistaken for their grandma... But then I see the ageism in the world and think sod that. I better stay ice white.

derxa · 08/04/2015 13:02

Totally agree with soup. (Can't put her name in bold cos I'm too old to work it out.)

ChoclolateOrange · 08/04/2015 13:15

My closest friend is 60 today. I met her when she was 31. To me she is exactly the same as the day we met. She is beautiful and fun and energetic. She is certainly not old!

Numbers are irrelevant. The only problem with them is that some of those who have a lower one think they are somehow superior.Hmm

Theoretician · 08/04/2015 13:18

It looks like I was out-of-date with my opinion about Scientists. In my defence, I was probably channelling Einstein.

www.livescience.com/16911-scientific-breakthroughs-genius-aging.html

Young geniuses might have once made nearly all of the significant breakthroughs in science, but nowadays that's doesn't seem to be the case, suggests a new study.

Einstein once said, "A person who has not made his great contribution to science before the age of 30 will never do so." The genius himself discovered that matter was transmutable to energy with his famous equation E = mc2 and helped lay the foundations of quantum theory by that age as evidence for his claim.

That peak age has shifted considerably, the researchers found, with 48 being prime time for physicists.