AIBU to come back over a year later to update?

[FarOverTheRainbow]

I thought I would finally come back and update for anyone that's interested. Over a year ago me and my abusive XP split up. Him and his family, mainly his mum were controlling abusive and a nightmare. They kicked me and DD out of our home told me I had to leave all the furniture even the things I'd paid for otherwise he'd get me arrested. He wasn't looking after my DD properly bringing her back soiled and in a state, refusing to give her back on time, locking her up until I hgave him specific things out the house. The list goes on and on. . The police were called out many times and one of the last times I updated was when I has moved into a refuge.

Not sure if anyone remembers but I don't really know how to link the old threads.

I spent 6 months in a refuge and his behaviour got worse and worse, he hired private investigators to find me and harass my friends and family. He would drive looking for me daily. He threatened to kill me twice. Tried to run my car off the road while I had DD in it. Smashed my friends window when he knew me and DD had been there that day.

He's taken me though the court system through a fact finding hearing and found guilty of controlling abusivng me and everything else I said happened. The process is finally finishing up but now he's decided not to see my DD thankfully.

Not sure if anyone's interested in an update but when all is as going on I didn't even realise I was being abused or that anything was wrong with his behaviour, MN helped me see everything so much more clearly gave me completely invaluable help and advice and was an absolutely amazing source of support for me that I can never properly explain just helped much all you on here helped me.

I was re reading through my old threads and can't quite believe how different my life is now and how much of a different life I have so thank you so much to everyone on MN who stuck with me through months and months of hell at all hours of the night and listened to me moan time and time again and helped me at one of the worst times of my life

I remember your threads too Rainbow. Am so so pleased for your and your daughter! x

Far - I remember your threads; they were harrowing. Thank you so much for updating us. I wish you and you DD all the very best in the world.

Oh I remember your threads well my lovely, I'm so very happy to hear that you and your daughter are settled and happy!

Hopefully once all the legalities are wrapped up you can move onwards and upwards

I remember your threads too Far, your scummy ex put you through so much, I seem to remember he even threatened to keep your daughter if you didn't hand over the TV? I'm pleased you're doing so well!!

Well done for getting through all that shit.
You're a great role model and I wish you all the best in the future.

thanks for letting us know - its great to hear such good news

FUCKING BOOM FAR

I don' remember your threads, but I'm so glad that things are working well and you are feeling good in yourself.

I'll second that (in far less drastic circumstances) MN has helped me recognise that certain things are not ok and deal with them.

Every happiness to you Rainbow you deserve it.

God yes I remember your story, you have been amazingly strong, & it's so good to hear how things have panned out, for you & DD.

Thanks for updating it's always good to hear a happy ending!!

I am so glad you came back to update. I remember your threads. I've been around MN for some years under various names. I got a lot of support indirectly from reading other peoples threads.

MN was a complete eye opener for me and helped me get out of my own abusive relationship.

It is great that things are now good for you and your DD and I am sure your post will give so much encouragement to the, sadly, many other people struggling with abusive relationships.

What a girl!

Never saw your threads before - but I loves a happy ending a positive update.

for getting your DD away from all of that. She does not need to grow up thinking that is normal.

Thank you everyone wasn't sure anyone would remember but I thought I'd update in case

This might not be the right place to ask but doesn't anyone have knowledge on me possibly getting DDs name changed to my surname, from what I've read online I can make an application to the courts and they will look at certain things like if he has contact, if he pays maintenance and if it's easier for the mother and child to have the same surname for the future

I think you hav no chance of that.

Do what I do and call her your surname, register her as this, as a 'known as' name