AIBU to come back over a year later to update?

[FarOverTheRainbow]

I thought I would finally come back and update for anyone that's interested. Over a year ago me and my abusive XP split up. Him and his family, mainly his mum were controlling abusive and a nightmare. They kicked me and DD out of our home told me I had to leave all the furniture even the things I'd paid for otherwise he'd get me arrested. He wasn't looking after my DD properly bringing her back soiled and in a state, refusing to give her back on time, locking her up until I hgave him specific things out the house. The list goes on and on. . The police were called out many times and one of the last times I updated was when I has moved into a refuge.

Not sure if anyone remembers but I don't really know how to link the old threads.

I spent 6 months in a refuge and his behaviour got worse and worse, he hired private investigators to find me and harass my friends and family. He would drive looking for me daily. He threatened to kill me twice. Tried to run my car off the road while I had DD in it. Smashed my friends window when he knew me and DD had been there that day.

He's taken me though the court system through a fact finding hearing and found guilty of controlling abusivng me and everything else I said happened. The process is finally finishing up but now he's decided not to see my DD thankfully.

Not sure if anyone's interested in an update but when all is as going on I didn't even realise I was being abused or that anything was wrong with his behaviour, MN helped me see everything so much more clearly gave me completely invaluable help and advice and was an absolutely amazing source of support for me that I can never properly explain just helped much all you on here helped me.

I was re reading through my old threads and can't quite believe how different my life is now and how much of a different life I have so thank you so much to everyone on MN who stuck with me through months and months of hell at all hours of the night and listened to me moan time and time again and helped me at one of the worst times of my life

You have been through hell and survived!

Your update will offer a glimmer of hope for those who are still suffering that escape from and life after abuse is possible.

I wish you and your DD a safe and happy new life together.

I remember you Rainbow. What a wonderful update. You are amazing. You win. Enjoy your happy future. You deserve it.

Thank you for coming back and updating, I'm sure other posters agree that its nice to see a what will be (when the courts finish) happy ending.

I wish you and dd all the best, stay strong xx

Well done you for getting through that shit - hope the future is bright for your and your DD.

Well done you and well done everyone who helped you here and in real life.

I didn't see your posts but how lovely that you have come so far and came back to update....very inspiring to others and a life-affirming post!

I do remember, and thank you for coming back to update.

I often think about you, I followed all of your threads. So glad to hear you are doing so well now.

I am so happy to read this. I hope your and your daughter's future is full of peace and much happiness.

I remember you too

Thanks for the update. Its so nice to hear of a happy ending x

I vaguely remember. I'm glad things are improving for you and hope they continue to do so

For saying I've been through hell and survived is true. My life felt like a living nightmare. There was constantly something. Never a moments peace and it made me feel so much worse when he had people knocking my very elderly and Ill Nans door trying to ask questions about me.

All the stress, hours of tears and sleepless nights have been worth it because my little girl is so so happy. She's developing perfectly and all I've ever wanted is for her to have a proper childhood not get caught up in adult arguments and drama and now. I no she's finally going to get that it makes it all so worth while. She's my whole world and I'm glad that even when I felt so down and didn't know how I could deal with more and more problems I did because now she'll finally be free. There's nothing more I could ask for,

I do feel sad sometimes that she doesn't and won't have a relationship with her "dad" but he would never have a proper loving daughter relationship with her it would all be on me and her little mind is better off without that

How lovely to hear that things have improved so much Far

You were so brave, and yes so good to have evidence here for women in the earliest stages of these nightmare situations to know on the other side of all this hell there is a future and it's a good one. xxxx

Oh far im so pleased you came back and updated. I occasionally searched for you because I read your threads at the time and was so worried. He was a class A cock and im so glad and DD are happy and safe now.

Well done. When you do get together with someone else, make sure you dump him at the slightest sign of disrespect.

MN really is a magically place and helps people when they feel lower then low soppy and very unMN like but I hope that anyone reading this can see that if I can get through it then they can too

I hadn't read your first threads to my knowledge but just wanted to agree with everyone else - bloody well done! You have given your dd an amazing gift - much respect to you and I hope everything goes well for you both now!

I don't remember your threads Rainbow but I think I recognise your username. Well done for being so brave to get away from that shit head. I'm so pleased you and DD are in a better place now. and

I remember you and I'm VERY pleased to read this. Well done, you're amazing and your achievement in getting out and starting a new life really can't be overstated.

Well done ! What wonderful and brave time model for your dd!

I'm so so pleased that you managed to get away and you and your DD can build a new life away from that poor excuse of a man. Live your new life to the full, show him that despite his best efforts he can't destroy you. You sound like an amazing, brave, strong woman

Role! *

I've spent so much time working on myself and how to keep myself in a strong position for the future and how to recognise behaviours as they start so I can get out early

I've met someone new and things are going well and slowly but I feel much more in control and things are so so different