Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've been signed off work for a week, aibu to take that week off?

64 replies

brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 07:13

My mother seems to think so.

I've a reoccurring illness. I'm not an ill person generally and hasn't had a day off sick since this time last year.

A few weeks ago I got hit by illness, had to see a doctor. finished my meds, went back to work but still felt shocking. The next day I had a bad relapse and ended up back at the doctors on stronger meds amd ended up with just shy of 2 weeks off.

because I went back for that one day it now counts as two lots of sickness. three lots in a rolling 6 months means Instant investigation.

anyway. I thought I was ok. last Saturday I came down with it again. back to out of hours and more meds. its my annual leave so I only had to call in sick one day.
I'm still ill. I had to see another doctor late Thursday who has given me 3 types of meds and a sick note for a week off.

I think I should take it off. I'm not well and need to get better. plus if I go back today and then get worse it counts as two lots of sickness. I won't be praised for ' trying ' ill end up in more trouble.

It also means that the day I called in sick a week ago will be part of this whole sickness. ..amd ill get my annual leave back. where as if I don't use my note I think it will count as sickness. ..and annual leave. and then if I get worse in the next few days it could count as two lots of sick rather than one big one.

I think my mum is of the opinion where she thinks you try then go home but as soon as you set foot in at work, if you go home it's counted as another incident.

The doctor clearly thinks I'm not fit for work as he has given me the note. so, aibu to use it.

OP posts:
TendonQueen · 04/04/2015 07:16

Take the week off. You need to get better.

Silvercatowner · 04/04/2015 07:18

If your doctor (who has trained for a long time to gain his/her qualifications) deems you unfit for work then you need to not be in work. Your employers insurance may not cover you if you are in work against a doctors advice.

MrsRonBurgundy · 04/04/2015 07:19

My work has the '3 occasions' rule and I often exercise it as I manage a large number of staff.
However, as a company we use it with common sense. I have had people try to come back in too soon for 1 day and then go back off and I count it as 1 instance of sick. They flag on all my reports as needing to be dealt with but I just explain why I'm not and produce the relevant return to work forms to demonstrate why. I would hope your company do the same. The policy is there as a guide but individuals should still be treated as such.

If I were you, I'd have the time off and get yourself back to full health before going back or you'll slow down your recovery

CatHammock · 04/04/2015 07:20

You think you're not well enough to work. Your doctor thinks you're not well enough to work. But your mum thinks you should... make a show of trying, despite that it'll a) not help you get better b) get you in grief at work. Do I have the right of it?

You've been signed off work. Stay off work.

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 07:26

Yes, that's right
she thinks it's better to show wiling. I've tried explaining it doesn't work like that anymore. They know from my previous sick record that I'm not off all the time.

It was documented on my back to work that it was one illness and that I came back when I shouldn't have done but it still counts as two lots.

This will be the third so I'm guessing ill be on trouble though I do have doctors notes.

I'm not ill to look at, I think that's part of it. I can get out of bed and things. I've had a series of chest infections and then pneumonia and then that cleared for 3 weeks and I got hit by another chest infection. I'm so wheezy I've been given inhalers and I'm coughing so hard that I can't function. my pulse is racing apparently and I'm just knackered. but, I look ok just a tired version of me.

OP posts:
FishWithABicycle · 04/04/2015 07:27

Take the time off properly, don't try to go into work again till you are properly healthy and even then you need to talk to your employers about a phased return (e.g. Starting with no more than 3 hours in a day, no more than 3 days in a week) to check you are actually well enough before you start attempting your normal hours.

AgathaChristie01 · 04/04/2015 07:32

Take it, your health comes first. Get yourself better, and then go back. Sounds like a rotten dose, mind yourself.

CitySnicker · 04/04/2015 07:37

I think you CANT go in if you've been signed off and your company shouldn't want you to. Something to do with company insurance if you go into premises when you've been deemed too ill to work. Vague memory but that's the gist.

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 07:39

I don't think ever in my life have I ever been so ill. certainly never had this much time off work.

The doctor was concerned and said if this lot doesn't sort it ill get a hospital referal.

OP posts:
springbabydays · 04/04/2015 07:45

You won't get into trouble at work if your illness is genuine. An investigation will establish this. A lot of places have this rule to pick up on people trying to fleece the system. Try to relax and get better.

christinarossetti · 04/04/2015 07:45

Of course you need to take the week off in order to get better.

Box5883284322679964228 · 04/04/2015 07:45

Omg! No you can't go in. I've been seriously ill with a chest infection and couldn't get off the bed. You need to recover! Why isn't your mum thinking of your health? Crazy lady.

antumbra · 04/04/2015 07:52

Technically yes you are entitled to take that time off. In practice though it depends o your employer.

I have worked for employers that would have a less that favourable attitude.
Is it a big company? Usually your rights are uphelp to a greater degree than with a smaller business.
Some small companies I have worked for would see you out the door for this. My OH would be sacked if he tried to take a lunch break.... I have worked for companies that would sack anyone not doing a few hours a day of unpaid overtime, or a new father trying to take paternity leave.

Only you know the culture of the company.

Greenoes · 04/04/2015 07:54

I work for the NHS and the 3 occasions rule applies. At investigation, HR would look at the occasions and "link" them as 1 occasion as they're obviously all related. Do you have an occupational health department? If so, you can self refer or ask your manager to refer you as engaging with occupational health shows that you are committed to making a recovery to get back to work.

To answer your question, take the week as sick - you are sick and use your annual leave to aid a "phased return" to ease you back in gently when you're fully recovered.

Pneumonia is serious - take your time to get better Thanks

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 07:54

I think she's thinking of my job.

I'm a lone parent. so she thinks it's even more important and I don't want to annoy them..

being a lone parent also means it's a bit harder to rest. which is kind of why it's more important to get better I think.

I'm ok for about an hour and then I'm just done in. I'm spending the while time coughing so much that my eyes are bloodshot and watery and if o don't cross my legs I'm in trouble (.which is a new one on me and I'm horrified by )
or, I'm coughing till I'm retching. I'm public facing. I can't imagine any member of the public want a middle aged women with her legs crossed, tears Down her face? red faced and coughing till she retches, helping them.

Or, my breath catches and I can't get a breath in till I get smacked hard on the back or now take an Inhaler. which I can't have on my person at work either.

But then ill be ok for an hour or two.

OP posts:
Lonelyimpulseofdelight · 04/04/2015 07:56

You've touched on it yourself - your Mum is thinking about different, historical methods of managing employee sickness. She is making a superficially sensible comment about trying to show willing but as you say it's different now. Take the time you need to recover and just repeat "It doesn't work like that any more", until it sinks in.

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 07:57

Huge company , so no worry really.

OP posts:
antumbra · 04/04/2015 08:00

If itis a big company you have less to worry about.

lonely I disagree that it is "different now"- many small companies still treat their staff like this.

Shenanagins · 04/04/2015 08:03

Most companies are sensible with this type of thing. The three bouts of sickness/ investigation should be a positive thing reflecting good practice. The investigation should be about finding out whether there is an underlying cause and what they can do to support you back to work. Of course, it will also look for patterns for those who are taking the piss which clearly you aren't.

The problem has arisen that some employers are a bit shit resulting on genuinely sick people fearing for their jobs.

TheEmpressofBlandings · 04/04/2015 08:09

I had repeated chest infections and pneumonia a few years back and I tried to carry on and carry on because I 'wasn't that bad'. I did not get better until I gave in and stopped and stayed in bed for a week. I was a SAHM to 3 kids with a DH working away, so not easy! Please don't go in to work, you need to rest rest and rest some more. If your mum wants to help, could she take your dc for a few days?

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 08:15

Haha. No.

I've just spoken to her, she asked how I was and I said my chest and top of my back feel like I've done ten rounds with mike tyson. I honestly feel like I've been kicked front and back by a horse or something. It's tight and tender and hurts when I move. she said it was my own fault for just sitting about yesterday and I should help myself by doing a few things round the house.

I think she thinks I'm making it up.

OP posts:
LadyCatherineDeTurd · 04/04/2015 08:15

Listen to the person with the medical degree.

LIZS · 04/04/2015 08:21

You need to stay off and recover fully. There isn't much point disguising it as leave unless you will lose out financially on sick pay. Does employer refer to occupational health?

Lonelyimpulseofdelight · 04/04/2015 08:23

Antumbra I think you are misunderstanding me. If I was working for a company that didn't have the system where three seperate incidents of sickness in a rolling twelve month period triggered management action I would go in to work to show willing. If I was working for a company that did have that system I wouldn't go into work if I knew there was a chance I would have to go sick again, creating a further period of sickness triggering management action.
I haven't gone sick in the last ten years of constant employment and only had a handful of days off prior to that for proper flu etc. I'm not encouraging people to take the micky.

Box5883284322679964228 · 04/04/2015 08:35

Your mums never had a serious chest infection then! She probably thinks you have a cold or mild flu.