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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've been signed off work for a week, aibu to take that week off?

64 replies

brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 07:13

My mother seems to think so.

I've a reoccurring illness. I'm not an ill person generally and hasn't had a day off sick since this time last year.

A few weeks ago I got hit by illness, had to see a doctor. finished my meds, went back to work but still felt shocking. The next day I had a bad relapse and ended up back at the doctors on stronger meds amd ended up with just shy of 2 weeks off.

because I went back for that one day it now counts as two lots of sickness. three lots in a rolling 6 months means Instant investigation.

anyway. I thought I was ok. last Saturday I came down with it again. back to out of hours and more meds. its my annual leave so I only had to call in sick one day.
I'm still ill. I had to see another doctor late Thursday who has given me 3 types of meds and a sick note for a week off.

I think I should take it off. I'm not well and need to get better. plus if I go back today and then get worse it counts as two lots of sickness. I won't be praised for ' trying ' ill end up in more trouble.

It also means that the day I called in sick a week ago will be part of this whole sickness. ..amd ill get my annual leave back. where as if I don't use my note I think it will count as sickness. ..and annual leave. and then if I get worse in the next few days it could count as two lots of sick rather than one big one.

I think my mum is of the opinion where she thinks you try then go home but as soon as you set foot in at work, if you go home it's counted as another incident.

The doctor clearly thinks I'm not fit for work as he has given me the note. so, aibu to use it.

OP posts:
Box5883284322679964228 · 04/04/2015 08:40

Gp knows best. It's all covered with sick notes and is all essentially one illness. Unquestionable.

Showing willing can only be done if you can think you can limp through the day - for example you feel like you have the start of flu. However your illness is more serious and despite treatment, you haven't recovered and have clearly been told to rest.

ilovesooty · 04/04/2015 08:43

Stay off and get well. Any reputable can't will expect you to take any annual leave where you're ill at a later date and as this is unquestionably one illness I'd hope it would be covered as such under sickness management procedures.

ilovesooty · 04/04/2015 08:44

Any reputable company, sorry.

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 08:46

All covered by sick note all saying the same illness. .

I just called work who were fine. They said not to come back until I am better as if I go off again it will count as two incidences.

They know me, I'm not someone who takes the piss. They asked how I was coping with dd and told me to rest.

OP posts:
MadameJosephine · 04/04/2015 08:48

I am currently at home on my 3rd incident of illness which will now trigger an investigation. I tried 'showing willing' but that ended up with my manager taking me to A&E Sad
Stay at home and look after yourself, even if they do investigate all they will find is a genuine illness and an employee who has already tried to come back too soon once, dont make the same mistake again

MadameJosephine · 04/04/2015 08:51

Oh and my dad thinks im going to get the sack, he says that every time im off work, even when im on annual leave. He doesn't understand that they cant do that anymore!

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 09:02

Oh no, hope you are better soon. Bloody awful when you are actually ill isn't it, it's not something you can help.

when I went back before, I worked one day as a short shift, which was my usual shift. I went in the next morning and over the course of the first hour went down hill so quickly. from being Normal ish, I was dripping in sweat, shaking and dizzy. Called the doctors and they gave me an appt for an hours time.i stayed at work in that state. by the time I got to the doctors I was shaking so hard I couldn't stop. They covered me in a blanket and we're giving me cups of tea. never had that happen to me before.

so. even though they could see it was real and I really showed willing. ..Two bouts of illness. This is now the third.

OP posts:
MadameJosephine · 04/04/2015 09:13

It sucks but thankfully, like you, my employers know me well enough to know I dont take the piss. All three of my episodes have been the same thing and im having investigations with a cardiologist so hopefully we'll get to the bottom of it soon. My next dilemma is whether to stay off until my next cardiology appt on 15 april or to try to go in and risk a 4th episode.

Hope you are feeling better soon Flowers

pantsjustpants · 04/04/2015 09:20

Stay home and get better, your work are right.

On the legal side of things, you can't go to work whilst signed off. You'd invalidate their insurance. You can see a go and get signed back on, they can list certain requirements such as part time hours etc, but I think it would be in your best interests to be 100% well. Bear in mind you may need longer than the week, so would need a gp appointment.

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 09:23

Is that the legal side of things?

work said I can chose to go back at any point as the note isn't law.

OP posts:
sonjadog · 04/04/2015 09:25

Definitely stay at home. This sounds like something I had in the autumn year before last. It took about six weeks to clear.

Ignore your Mum and listen to your doctor.

ThatBloodyWoman · 04/04/2015 09:27

I would take the time and go back to dr's for an extension if not absolutely well to return.
Don't go back too soon and risk another bout,both from your pov and your work record pov.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/04/2015 09:30

geez you sound really ill. There are no prizes for dragging yourself in. stay home. get better.

your mums bonkers my mother has been hospitalised with her chest before.

I have to say, your comment about not being able to have your inhaler on you is very worrying. Surely that's something you have to have access to 24/7

listen to the Dr. they don't write these notes for fun. they are concerned enough to advise you to stay off work.

Flowers
KenDoddsDadsDog · 04/04/2015 09:30

You can go back to work before the end of your fit note if the employer agrees.
They would be very strict to give you a warning for a continual illness , despite the occasions . Have you an OHS that they would refer you to?
For all those saying warnings aren't given for genuine sickness that's incorrect. Prove it not , all cases are treated as genuine .

jelliebelly · 04/04/2015 09:31

Listen to the doctor not your mum! You are I'll you need to rest and it might take more than a week to get fit again. The 3 in 6 months rule is to stop people taking the piss not to stress out the genuinely ill.

KenDoddsDadsDog · 04/04/2015 09:31

Hope you feel better OP , worrying will make it worse so stay off , rest and get well.

Husbanddoestheironing · 04/04/2015 09:32

I think the new 'fit notes' say you are allowed to go back without consulting your GP again if you feel better before the end of the sign-off period. But really it sounds like you shouldn't be with that uncontrollable cough- especially in a public-facing role. I had similar recently but after my self-cert week I felt ok except for the massive coughing fits and was able to negotiate with my manager a mix of work at home and in a room on my own with no 'public' interaction. No one else wanted the bug so they were fine with that Grin hope you feel better soon

letscookbreakfast · 04/04/2015 09:33

Every time I'm off ill (under-developed lungs mean I get chest infections etc) my parents tell me to buck my ideas up as I'll get the sack, I work for a massive company but my parents don't understand how I'm still working for them.

OP ignore your mum, take the week off and rest as much as you can.

RandomMess · 04/04/2015 09:34

My understanding is that if you want to go back earlier you need to get a "fit for work" note, at least at my last place of work you did?

Slowtrain2dawn · 04/04/2015 09:48

You have been brought up to "struggle on" whatever haven't you?! That's why you need us all to tell you not to listen to your mum.It's kind of ingrained I bet.
I once worked somewhere where HR brought in a similar scheme and it made me stay off longer when ill to ensure I was better.
Stay off, rest as much as possible. You can't possibly work with the symptoms you describe. And I am pretty sure you would be sent straight home anyway.
Hope you have some supportive people around you that are sympathetic and can look after DC etc.

FlabbyMummy · 04/04/2015 09:50

I tried to work through chest problems and ended up having to have six weeks off with pleurisy and pneumonia. Take the week off.

If your mum wants to help then ask for childcare to get proper rest.

passthewineplz · 04/04/2015 10:05

You've done the right thing staying off work OP, there's no point in going back until you're 100%.

Just make sure the fit note (they're not called sick notes anymore) is dated for the duration of your sickness.

Re going back to work, I wasn't allowed back until it ran out. Then had to get another fit note saying that I was fit for work. (I worked for a company with a strict sickness policy).

Original poster
brentonstripeandredlipstick · 04/04/2015 10:10

It is. It gives me till next Fri off. Then I'd be off that weekend away.

so, ages.

I'm sure I'll be better by then.

OP posts:
sooperdooper · 04/04/2015 10:10

Listen to the doctor, stay off until you're better, work will be fine as it's obviously all one illness and you're covered by the sick notes

Hope you feel better soon

Mintyy · 04/04/2015 10:13

You poor thing. Is there really nothing that can be done for you to get rid of this illness? I'd push for hospital referral now. You have missed a huge amount of work. It must be very difficult.

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