Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

To want to get an automatic car

130 replies

birobenny · 03/04/2015 18:17

I am learning to drive at a relatively late stage in life and am a terribly nervous driver (seriously so bad a feel sick before I get behind the wheel) I am learning in a manual and will do the test for a manual but I really want to get an automatic when I pass. I need to be confident by the time D's starts school in September and every panic (well a lot of them ) that I have while driven happen when faffing with the clutch/gears. Dh has been driving for 20 years and is a very confident driver. He will not get an automatic car because he says he doesn't like them. Who IBU?

OP posts:

StickEm · 03/04/2015 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Andrewofgg · 03/04/2015 18:24

He is. Especially if you are going to run two cars. What does it matter to him?

Oddly enough DW did not want to go automatic (and we only run one car) but I insisted. Then she had her knees replaced and was back on the road a great deal sooner than she would have been if she had had her way

StayingSamVimesGirl · 03/04/2015 18:25

We have an automatic and a manual, and I really love my automatic. But dh and ds1, who are proper petrol heads, and actually enjoy driving, feel that there's more skill involved in driving a manual, and so it is more fun for them.

StickEm · 03/04/2015 18:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 03/04/2015 18:26

I live our automatic. Much more restful on stop /start journies

StickEm · 03/04/2015 18:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rivercam · 03/04/2015 18:27

I passed on a manuel car but have always driven autos. For me, it takes the stress out of driving. I would never buy a manuel, for similar reasons you have cited.

Nanny0gg · 03/04/2015 18:29

I love my automatic (and my driving fanatic DH loves his too).

If it's your car, get what you want.

FarFromAnyRoad · 03/04/2015 18:30

I learned later in life in an automatic, took the automatic test and have been happily driving one ever since. It has never been a problem for me. I think you would be much happier learning in an automatic.

Anomaly · 03/04/2015 18:32

Love my automatic, we both have them now. Honestly if you're stuck in traffic particularly when its say the motorway and you're going from 0 to 40 and back again they're great. Had to drive a manual and couldn't believe what a pain I found it after my car.

CycleChic · 03/04/2015 18:33

If you're looking to drive manuals, then you would be far better to get one of those and being the main driver between now and when your ds starts school. you are unlikely to get comfortable enough with driving a manual without practice, and I doubt that you'll get enough of that before your test, so if you do plan to get an automatic, you may as well take your test in one.

BTW my DH was all about manual cars until we bought a Prius (they only are automatic)). Now he actively requests automatics when given the choice

Andrewofgg · 03/04/2015 18:33

FarFromAnyRoad Three years ago I arranged to rent an automatic - but the previous customer pranged it and even a big company could not find me another at short notice and I had to accept a manual. An automatic-only licence is not really a good idea.

GwenaelleLaGourmande · 03/04/2015 18:36

DH drives an automatic but my car is manual. When I replace it it will definitely be with an automatic.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/04/2015 18:37

I hate automatics and I do 90% of the driving in our house so we have a manual. However, if it's your car to drive, why does DH get a vote?

ooerrmissus · 03/04/2015 18:38

Your DH is BU. Automatics used to be shit but that is not the case these days. My DH and I both drive automatics and they are great, not the slow sluggish things of old. I regularly take on the boy racers in mine and win ??.
If you need to drive by Sept and are struggling with gears then the obvious solution would be to learn to drive in an automatic and to buy an auto once you pass.
Perhaps if your DH went for a test drive in one he would drop his opposition?

XiCi · 03/04/2015 18:39

God, I love my auto, would never go back to a manual car now
Manual gear boxes are so outdated, technological advancement means we don't need them and automatics just make for such a more pleasurable driving experience.
In my experience the only people who cling onto the manual car thing are men who think that are akin to Lewis Hamilton because they have to change gear.
Your husband is being an arsehole. If you are panicking faffing around with the gears then driving an auto will make you (and your children) safer

Fluffycloudland77 · 03/04/2015 18:41

Your car, your choice.

Chewbecca · 03/04/2015 18:43

Are you going to share a car? If so, you need to find something that suits you both. Can you persuade him to try both and try to find a car you both like?

I do think once you've learned and passed on a manual, you'll be fine, once you've mastered it, it really is easy.

But if you're having your own car, get whatever you feel most comfortable in, surely?

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 03/04/2015 18:53

Maybe the OP is canvassing her DH opinion because that's how they arrive at decisions in their house, because she values his opinion, because he might be driving it as well? Could be any number of reasons, really.

Only on mumsnet is there collective faux-horror that a DH/DP might be approached for an opinion. In real life, most couples would discuss the relative merits when purchasing a bloody car.

Anyway. OP, I'm in the same boat. Late learner, want an automatic. A traffic cop friend says that in his opinion they are much safer, especially for new drivers. Helped make my mind up even more.

You could mention it to your DH, but frankly, why even fucking speak to him about it? WHY? Just buy the car. Buy it.

Good luck with the driving, OP!

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/04/2015 18:59

A traffic cop friend says that in his opinion they are much safer I cry bullshit. Not that he said it, I believe you but that this is true. Surely manuals, where you slow with gears and brakes are safer. Let chance of mistaking pedals. Also, if your brakes fail in a manual, it is fairly easy to slow right down.

IMO automatics make it easier for shit/nervous/incompetent drivers to get on the roads (I live in Canada; there are lots of them here) and therefore are less safe.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/04/2015 18:59

*less chance

ClumsyNinja · 03/04/2015 19:00

YANBU. Go for it OP, your DH is being v v unreasonable. Just because he's confident it doesn't mean he can belittle your anxieties about driving. If you feel more confident driving an auto then get one. If you lived in the States, you'd be considered normal driving an auto.

We both have automatic cars. My DH is an anxious driver and came to driving in his forties. He feels much happier driving an auto and it gives him a lot more freedom living in a rural area.

I've been driving more than 30 years and probably had an auto for the last 15 or so years. I bought my first one off my brother to replace a knackered car and found it brilliant for my city (stop start motoring) and m-way journeys to work that I did back then.

Topseyt · 03/04/2015 19:05

Has he experience of driving an automatic at all? If not then he can't judge, and is perhaps just hoping to stay with the devil he knows??

I passed my test on a manual and drove manuals for 30 years. I only got an automatic last summer. A little bit doubtful to start with, but I really love it now. If I have a choice I won't return to manuals.

Your car though, so it should be your choice.

caroldecker · 03/04/2015 19:07

MrsTerry 4 years ago I would have agreed with you, but having been forced into an automatic for work, I would choose one all the time and find a manual no better for anything and worse is stop/start traffic.
Modern autos are a dream - and have plenty of engine braking.

Original poster

birobenny · 03/04/2015 19:09

We will only have the one car between us.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6