To think I should have known World War 3 would have broken out!

[WomenVsbarbie]

This relates to this thread earlier. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2337778-To-buy-my-child-an-e-cigarette

Anyway I spoke to my dss ad dd and they have admitted to smoking on a regular basis. . They are know going to receive no pocket money from us and we will be paying and taking control of their finances from now on. They will be put on nicquitine gum if they want help quiting.

Anyway world war 3 broke out as it was ds (twin to dd) that told be about smoking. They have ganged up on ds because they realised it was him who told me. Anyway after teenage abuse has been thrown about and tantrums and strops by all people. Dss who already clashes with ds, has been quite nasty to ds (who I have told not to respond). Dd has been just as nasty and a bit of a brat.

The nail in the coffin was Dp coming back home (from day out with younger dc) backing dss up. Like seriously he's verbally abused my son, who did the right thing telling me about a health damaging addiction.

I need . So their are many people being unreasonable. Dd, dss and dh.

And you are just gong to accept it?

Going

Well if your husband stops the allowance is he going to get his ex on board?
Are you just going to accept your husband's failure to punish the abuse to you and your son?

Surely there must be a come back for swearing at you. I don't think I could tolerate sharing my home with someone who used abusive language towards me.

He's spoken to ex who has agreed to not give dss any money.

I am furious Dp has apologised but not dss

So is he going to punish him for the abuse?

I haven't asked.

You shouldn't be asking. You should be insisting on it.

I would rather an apology for ds than for me.

Just asked dss to apologise complete refusal.

Hardly surprising given the disrespectful example of his father.

In that case I'd be telling your husband to do some proper parenting then.
And say that you don't want your step son staying until he does.

I then get accused by ex of being an evil stepmum. I lose either way.

Well since you're the bad guy now anyway, you might as well embrace it. Draw your boundaries.

Ltb.

Agree tendon but it's so much hassle

Damn it's quite on here tonight.

Ds gone to bed no apology.

Could really do with some advice?

I thought you'd been given some. If you're not prepared to assert yourself there's little to add really.

Nevermind about your step son. Your partner verbally abused your son. Why are you letting him do that. (And before you say that you are not letting him do that - you are by staying with him. This is your son's home. He has the right to not be abused.)

My partner never verbally abused my son dss did though. I feel really lonely. Dh has been shit and not supported me

And if you don't insist on some respect for your son you're not supporting him.