to wonder if men care as much about father's day

[LittleSpark]

I can't imagine my DP having an apocalyptic meltdown because the DC presented him with burnt toast/undercooked pancakes/unripe berries for breakfast.

Ladies, some of you are out of control.

At DD school they explained that it's mothering sunday and so is for anyone who cares for them.

So on that basis I got a present for DH from the girls and he was dead chuffed.

I've not been on MN on MD before. It's madness.

I was just coming here to ask the same question!

I don't think they do, at all. My children don't have a father so it's not a day I ever have to think about but the experience I've had of mother's day today has definitely led me to believe that men don't care about father's day.

I had to be at he at work at 6am today. It was a one off and we don't normally work Sundays. The other 3 members of the team are all male and their wives were all upset or furious or both. One came to see us and said she wanted her husband to leave because she wanted to go out to lunch (he couldn't leave). Another texted and said she wanted her husband home to do presents (he couldn't go home). My colleagues were quite stressed about it and said they couldn't understand the importance of the day because they don't think about special days in that way, especially something like father's day.

Mind you, they were asking me why mother's day was so special and I didn't know either so maybe it's a field of work thing rather than a gender thing!!

Random it's the same every year here and gets worse as the bar gets raised over time.

Meaning it has always been an angsty occasion on mn, but seems to be increasing in intensity.

My OH doesn't care about Fathers' Day. My dad, on the other hand, would have a HUGE hissy fit if it was forgotten.

I think it is personality, not gender.

Agree OP.

Since when did the world have to stop turning because it was Mother's Day? It's just a day - if you need a whole day dedicated to you and only you then you need some perspective.

To be honest I don't really worry about father's day but it's nice if the kids remember and want to do something.

I'm more bothered about mother's day and make sure the kids get something nice and take the time to show their appreciation. It's more important for me as she's a SAHM and works tirelessly to make sure they're ok.

For me it's a day when she can do whatever she fancies and when she doesn't have to lift a finger. Currently got some slow roast lamb on the go so hope she enjoys it!

Sorry to hear that some are getting so upset about today but can understand it.

My ex-H did. He expected to be treated as a God for the day. For Mother's Day how ever he did nothing with the reasoning that I wasn't his mum so it wasn't his problem. He never forgave me for giving birth to DS2 the day before Father's Day and therefore still being in hospital and unable to make him breakfast in bed etc.

I'm a step mum been one for 20 years. Have I ever had a birthday card never mind a birthday card Erm no. Do they love me ermmmm no they have a mum even though the only thing she did was actually bring them into the world then up and left soon after. But she is mum and she therefore has Mother's Day.

Some of you lot have been so ungrateful and quite frankly so bitchy today.

How have I been ungrateful and bitchy That seems a bit sweeping!

This is an odd thread. It is not a FACT that all women (mothers?) are ungrateful, selfish, entitled loons and all men (fathers?) are laid back, relaxed types who never expect anything from anyone.

I mean that's obvious, surely? I would have thought it was obvious

To be fair - the words "some of you" have been used repeatedly Pilchard

This is a really obvious thread about a thread. How kind and generous some of you are!

Well yeah sure "Some of you lot have been so ungrateful and quite frankly so bitchy today" but I've read the thread and I don't remember thinking "wow that's incredibly bitchy" about any of the posts so it might as well be me as anyone else

I just don't understand it. Feels like some people are quite enjoying what they see as an opportunity to slag women off

I'd need to read the thread in question - I can only go by some of the threads I've read on MN recently, and there does seem to be some posters who verge on the Mothersdayzillas...

could be worse you could have been forged marched to Tesco at 8pm to select your flowers and card as others watched in amazment/disbelief, then not all day the words "happy mothers day" leave someone's lips then after the Italy vs France game end demand to be driven back 2hours to army base

and that's just how my first ever mothers day has gone, lets just say I'm not doing fathers day and not holding my breath for next year anything special. I'm now going to sit in the dark because I've mangednto get DS to sleep and have a glass of vino (non gifted vino)

Happy Fucking Mothers Day All

I mean this thread! People saying women are nuts and bitchy and whathaveyou and men are calm and lovely. Oh sorry SOME obv.

Just weird generalisations and stereotypes. Some posters on the thread just sound like they're really pleased to be able to put the boot into women.

I mean "out of control", "ungrateful", "bitchy", "bitter", "demanding" etc etc etc always couched with this "oh SOME women" and then oh of course men aren't like that at all.

It just makes really grim reading.

I really can't see how anyone can read this thread and say posters are ungrateful and bitchy. It's just utterly random, really horrible sentiments.

Reading stuff like this makes me feel like, yes lots of people really think women are pretty shit, even other women, and there's this gleeful sort of HA see they're all mad bastards vibe going on.

My DP has alwaysgiven something to his mum on mother's day but has never done Father's Day even as a child as apparently mothering Sunday is based on a religious event (correct me if I'm wrong on this!) and Father's Day is basically made up. So he helps the kids make cards and things for me on mother's day but doesn't expect anything on Father's Day. But because of how commercial they both have become the DCs want to make things for both occasions.

I think it's more about the kids than anyone else, they love the excitement of bringing up breakfast and cards and jumping on me in the morning.

I just don't understand it. Feels like some people are quite enjoying what they see as an opportunity to slag women off Don't forget the competitive misery and martyrdom. Just because some people don't get anything or for birthdays, Christmas, Hanukkah or Eid that doesn't mean that ritual, celebrations days and holidays aren't important for others. If you don't care either way, that is a reason for YOU not to get anything not a reason for someone you've never met to get nothing.

Oh and Ginger you deserve to feel special because you are special. Here's and and to all the other Mums on here that want them and and a big, bloody unmumsnetty ((HUG))

Miserable bastards.

Fathers Day has religious roots if you believe the CEO of Clintons to be a deity.

Men are rarely unappreciated primary carers at the end of their tether with little to no rest since baby was born.

Men aren't brought up and socialised to think their primary goal in life is to be a good dad and sacrifice their life and career for their children.

Men don't have covert social pressure from other dads comparing what they got and who got more of a fuss on Father's Day.

Also mother's day is one day when you ARE meant to get a bit of a fuss. I see it on par with birthday's, Christmases and namesake days; yes, of course you should be loved and appreciated the rest of the year but that doesn't mean you are unreasonable to expect a treat or different treatment on a day which is unique in the calendar.

In our house on Mother's Day. I cook, and keep DC entertained so my wife can enjoy her chocolates in relative peace.

On Father's Day I make extra effort to spend quality time with DC (while my wife enjoys my chocolates in peace)

Its a win-win for us all

No,

Don't think I got anything last fathers' day, don't care. Their smiling faces when I come home every day are enough.