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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not worry if my child's birthday was at Christmas

33 replies

SaltySeaBird · 12/03/2015 18:55

Me and DH have been TTC number two for 20 months.

Last year we took a break from trying end March / early April as we didn't want a due date that fell Christmas week.

Christmas is a really busy time for us (lots of family and work related stuff) and we know that I'm likely to be hospitalised at the end of any pregnancy - I have several known complications to contend with.

We are due to hopefully start fertility treatment in May and DH thinks it would be sensible to take a break between now and then (it only means missing one cycle).

I think we should carry on and if it happens (unlikely) then the fact it would be a Christmas baby doesn't matter at all. He says we need a mental break and we both agreed previously that it's not an ideal time of year but ultimately he'll let me make the decision.

So AIBU to say a Christmas birthday / baby is no problem?

OP posts:

vinoandbrie · 12/03/2015 18:57

I had a Christmas Eve baby. It is wonderful.

Especially given you've been ttc for 20 months, I would be going for it, no point in missing an opportunity.

lloydlf33 · 12/03/2015 18:59

My birthday is on Christmas Day I've never had any issue with it. I really don't get the whole panic or worry about having a child over Christmas?! It's a great time of year.

ScaryMaryHinge · 12/03/2015 19:03

I have an almost Christmas DD, and it's fine. The year she was born it was a very different Christmas, I was in hospital until the 27th, but I wouldn't have changed it for anything. For what it's worth DD is now 7 and loves her Christmas birthday, it makes her feel special.

Totality22 · 12/03/2015 19:08

If I'd been TTC number 2 for that long then no I would not be having a break I'd also be looking to have some preliminary tests as well

BubblesInMyBath · 12/03/2015 19:14

I don't think you should worry about xmas babies

BUT

IME if a man says he needs a mental break - give it to him. Especially surrounding fertility issues

Jengnr · 12/03/2015 19:20

My baby was born a few days before Christmas. It's a rubbish time to have your birthday but it's not the end of the world.

Allstoppedup · 12/03/2015 19:25

My DS turned 1 on the 20th and I'll admit I did have a panic/worry about his birthday always being overshadowed by Christmas.

It was actually lovely, he was well and truly spoilt (as little ones should be!) and I now see it's not a problem at all. When he's older, I'll just throw his parties earlier in the month whilst still in school term so more people can make it as that's the only real issue re. people being too busy on the lead up to Christmas.

I think as long as you make it special, it really doesn't matter what day it is.

SuperMumTum · 12/03/2015 19:31

My birthday is January and DPs is end November and we decided to avoid an xmas baby as both of us disliked having birthdays at that time of year when we were younger. However we might have thought differently if we'd had trouble ttc.

TheFullGammon · 12/03/2015 19:43

As Bubbles says, if he needs a mental break, let him have one.

DC2's due date was 28th Dec. DC1 had taken ages to conceive so mentally we needed to press on just in case that was our month, and we got lucky. But we were in a different place with it. His birthday is pretty pants, but he is awesome and fabulous.

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 12/03/2015 19:44

Totality the OP said they're looking to start fertility treatment.

I wouldn't take a break for the Christmas baby reason but I would potentially take a break for both of you to regroup and refresh! Sounds like your DH may need it.

Scholes34 · 12/03/2015 20:00

My friend's baby was born on Christmas Day . . . one month early!

Daisyroll · 12/03/2015 20:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fresh01 · 12/03/2015 20:03

I have a December birthday and 3 of our 4 children have birthdays between 28 Dec and end of Jan. None of the children have a problem with birthdays at this time of year. All 3 have January parties and we have found this fine for people as it is generally a much quieter month.

The only thing it has meant is I start picking up things for presents from end of Aug onwards to spread the cost.

But if your DH wants a break before fertility treatment give this month a miss for that reason not the festive birthday.

Jackieharris · 12/03/2015 20:06

I have a DC with a Xmas birthday. Don't do it. At least not if you want to avoid having birthday parties everyone's too busy to show up to.

PizzaLegs23 · 12/03/2015 20:13

Would you not be more concerned that a Christmas baby could be a crazy Capricorn? Hold out for an Aquarius if you can.

keepsmiling2015 · 12/03/2015 20:13

If you've been trying all this time and really want to conceive. I think k falling pregnant I'd the most important thing tbh. I wouldn't be worrying about when the birth date would be.

CarlaVeloso · 12/03/2015 20:16

I took a break in March both times I was ttc. Also skipped Oct and Nov as wanted to avoid July and Aug for school reasons. I remember posting about it on here (under another name) and getting roasted for it!

Original poster

SaltySeaBird · 12/03/2015 20:43

Totality we've had three sets of treatment already, we know we are fertility challenged, the next appointment is in May (last one ended in miscarriage so we've had a break), however we still try as DD was a natural conception between treatments first time round.

OP posts:

Original poster

SaltySeaBird · 12/03/2015 20:46

Thanks for all your messages. I think we will keep going and just see. It's just I know it won't be a case of go into labour, give birth and out the next day, I'll have to be there a week at minimum and DD will be three and it will be the first Christmas she really gets, not to mention driving all over the place to see and stay with family.

OP posts:

Taytocrisps · 12/03/2015 20:48

I've a DC with a birthday close to Christmas. The main issue is the expense of a birthday present/birthday party and Christmas all at once. I usually have her party mid-December and give the parents a few weeks notice on account of it being such a busy time of year. I've never had an issue with kids not turning up for the party. Oh and she wanted a Build a Bear party one year but they don't do them in December because the shops are too busy .

Original poster

SaltySeaBird · 12/03/2015 20:48

Pizza I'm an awful mother ... I just realised I don't even know what DD's star sign is ... Better look that up in case she ever asks ...

OP posts:

hiccupgirl · 12/03/2015 20:50

My DS is 2 days before Christmas and I was in hospital the year he was born from 22-26th December due to complications. It really wasn't an issue and it makes Christmas more special now. He was a much wanted surprise after 3 yrs of trying so I certainly wasn't going to complain about his due date.

But if your DH needs a break from trying, you could always have a break for April and May anyway.

Taytocrisps · 12/03/2015 20:53

Salty I assumed that DD was a Capricorn for years. One day (when she was in school) she asked me her star sign and when I checked, I was really embarrassed to discover that she's actually a Sagittarius .

turquoiseamethyst · 12/03/2015 21:01

I think Christmas babies are lovely myself :) but I tend to think YANBU for whatever reason really.

I'm expecting a July/August baby - preferable (to me) than an autumn one but we are all different!

BeaLola · 12/03/2015 21:07

I had five lots of IVF, incl frozen transfers and 3 worked ... All would have ended up with either Christmas or very early Jan due dates, unfortunately I went onto miscarry. FWIW when I was pregnant the first time I remember thinking omg poor child a christmas baby but by the end of it all if I had had a baby I really don't think I would care what day it was born on , with your own traditions etc you make it special regardless of date. I went on to adopt a beautiful son and he funnily enough has an early December birthday! Good Luck to you , hope you get good news either naturally or IVF way.

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