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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to think that school uniforms are rubbish and sexist?

135 replies

Annahmolly · 06/03/2015 18:26

Just saw a lovely little girl in Starbucks with her mother. She was around 12 and sitting on an armchair, pulling her legs up to get comfortable. The ridiculously short, flimsy piece of material posing as a skirt rode up so high that her legs were almost uncovered. This is in March - most other people in there were in winter clothes. The silly knee-socks hardly made things much better, covering only half the leg. Surely thick, black tights would be much better, if schools absolutely must make girls wear skirts? It seems as though uniform regulations require girls to look "cute" and "feminine" at the expense of feeling warm and comfortable. The shoes are silly too - not appropriate for cold and wet weather, and neither girls nor boys ever seem to be wearing proper winter coats with their uniforms. What's with that?

Excuse my ignorance on this, but I did not grow up in Britain, so I don't know why these rules exist. I dread sending my daughter to school freezing cold just because some school regulations dictate that she has to show off her legs in a stupid little flimsy skirt. It restricts movement and is, in my opinion, sexist.

OP posts:
Mrsjayy · 08/03/2015 09:33

I would imagine the girl chose the teeny tiny skirt and lack of tights herself a lot of girls do wear short skirts and pull at them all day long they look uncomfy imo my dds always wore/wear trousers

TheFairyCaravan · 08/03/2015 09:36

At our boys' old school the boys had to wear trousers, a shirt with the top button done up,and a tie regardless of the weather. It had to be bloody hot before the blazers were allowed off.

The girls were allowed to wear a skirt, ankle socks and a revere collar blouse in the Summer. They were much cooler. That was bloody sexist!

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 08/03/2015 09:37

I like schools having a uniform though. Saves their own clothes, especially at primary school where they can covered in paint or some other shite. And Secondary where what's in fashion comes into play. As much as I didn't like wearing the skirts back then it was better than having to wear the hideous stuff my Mum thought I looked nice in. It would've been something else for the bullies to pick on.

Uniform is a good idea for lots of reasons.

GerbilsAteMyCat · 08/03/2015 09:40

I grew up in a place without school uniforms. It was a nightmare because there was an 'unofficial' school uniform that marked you out if you didn't wear it/your parents had other ideas about what kids should wear. School uniforms take this kind of crap out of the equation.
Sometimes kids make choices about how they wear their uniform that do not appear to be compatible with warmth. Don't blame the parents. My younger child chooses not to wear his school jumper. He wears only the polo shirt. He has done this for 2 years. I get pitying looks from the other parents who probably feel it is because we can't afford it. We have 10 of the wretched things thanks to hand me downs. They sit unused, next to the school coat he refuses to wear in favour of light garment covered in stars.
Sigh.

Bonsoir · 08/03/2015 09:43

Why don't French teens leave their coats at home?

BrightBlowsTheBroom · 08/03/2015 09:50

never heard of a school in which trousers were not an option for the girls

The co-ed private school which my son attended didn't allow it and as far as I know still doesn't. I don't have a problem with that. The girls' uniform was a knee length kilt in the school colours with thick black tights in winter. The girls in the primary school wore striped cotton dresses in summer, the girls in the secondary school wore their kilts all year.

OP is being ridiculous.

SoupDragon · 08/03/2015 09:55

Why don't French teens leave their coats at home?

Because they are soft southern wusses? Wink

My teen DSs wear their coats to school (and they aren't the only ones) so it's not all British teenagers who don't wear them anyway.

clam · 08/03/2015 10:11

Re: short skirts. Does the OP seriously think that that girl in Starbucks would have been wearing a sensibly-lengthed skirt if she hadn't been in school uniform?
just remembering the attire of a bunch of 16-year-olds I gave a lift to last week

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 08/03/2015 10:12

Fwiw I get what the op is saying. If the girl had been mine I would've told to her to cover her legs up and whinged at her that she'd if she'd worn trousers she'd be able to get more comfortable. She probably wanted to wear the stupid skirt. Mine do when it gets warmer. I let them but harp on them that they'll have sit so their undercrackers aren't on show.

Mrsjayy · 08/03/2015 10:18

My dds always wore q coat to schoolBut they walked I wonder if the non coat wearers get dropped off or gst the school bus?

clam · 08/03/2015 10:22

But that's not what the OP is saying. Her point was that school uniform is flimsy, cute and feminine, as well as inappropriate.
What others are pointing out, that it is more likely to have been this girl/her parents' choice or interpretation of the rules to have been dressed like this.

Mrsjayy · 08/03/2015 10:34

Maybe the girl liked being. Cute feminine though that isn't sexist is it? Or are all girls to dress in skirts at a sensible length to be taken seriously is that the op point?

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 08/03/2015 10:40

Oh I don't know or care! I just find skirts are impossible to sit comfortable in without showing your clouts. Unless they very long and flimsy.

I'm a sprawler they are no good for me.

Can you tell I don't like skirts?

GnomeDePlume · 08/03/2015 14:21

ManOfSpiel - I dont think that the opinions were disregarded more that the study looked beyond the superficial at what actually worked rather than sticking with received wisdom.

What the study said worked were the basics like quick feedback. Smaller class sizes and having more teaching assistants may be one way of facilitating this but without the strategic goal of speeding up feedback they will have no effect.

pointythings · 08/03/2015 18:12

The school my DDs go to is actually pretty sensible. I still hate uniform and always will, but it could be worse. They have to wear blazers and clip-on ties, but other than PE kit and the above, they can buy the rest anywhere. Trousers must be black and tailored in appearance - so no skinnies or jeggings or jeans - shoes must be plain black with low heel but nothing else specified (so mock-vans and ankle boots are fine), hair must be naturally occurring colours and no symbols shaved in bother otherwise flexible, no dangly earrings allowed (fair enough) but make-up and nail polish are fine. My DDs currently have major nail art on - polish, flower decals) and this will not be an issue. It walks the line between discipline and freedom of expression very well.

And I have to say that since DD1 started having periods, I have become a fan of blazers. She can carry what she needs and no-one need be the wiser.

redskybynight · 08/03/2015 18:34

IME private schools often insist that girls wear skirts with no option of trousers. Certainly true for all the private schools round here. On the other hand I can't think of a single state school that doesn't allow girls to wear trousers. I realise this is not a comprehensive study, but interesting that private schools seem to be more sexist on the school uniform front.

Original poster
Annahmolly · 09/03/2015 09:18

Yikes, that's me told! Like I said in the OP, I didn't grow up here so I didn't realise there was a choice of skirt or trousers. I didn't know that children could alter their uniforms either, such as making the skirt shorter. Don't they get told off about this?

However... I still think that these horrible flimsy polyester clothes are ugly, cold and uncomfortable.

OP posts:
ThisIsOurBlanket · 09/03/2015 09:35

I don't think uniforms are sexist especially, but I do think they are rubbish.

I don't understand how people think they are cheaper than just wearing your own clothes Confused. In what way are they cheaper? Surely it is cheaper not to have to buy, for example, two pairs of shoes, one for school, one for weekends, two fleeces, one for school, one for weekends, etc?

My DD's school doesn't have a uniform. We don't have dramas in the morning over what to wear - why would we? She just gets up, gets dressed in whatever she wants to wear, goes to school.
I don't have to be desperately washing polyester pinafores and logo school jumpers at the weekend, because DD can wear whatever is in her drawer.

I haven't heard of any bullying at DD's school over what anyone wears. It is just normal to them, they just wear clothes. And I think they still look smart, comfortable and ready to learn.

I can't really think of any benefits to uniform at all, tbh.

PurpleCrazyHorse · 09/03/2015 09:41

I thought older girls rolled up their school skirt to make it shorter when hanging around boys but roll it back down for wearing in the school so it isn't obviously short, therefore avoiding any trouble (or at least we did at our school!). I shudder at some of the stuff I wore in my teenage years Grin

In fact we had a great school uniform policy at my secondary. The uniform wasn't able to be purchased at a supermarket, so was expensive (downside) but it did really last as it was high quality fabric and well made. In Year 11 we were able to wear black and white (but not five pocket trousers, e.g. jeans or cargo trousers) and you could get away with shorter skirts but only if you wore opaque tights with them, otherwise knee length. Sixth form was the same but any colours. Tidy clothing with some basic rules, but enabled choice and personality, a good mix I think.

SoupDragon · 09/03/2015 10:48

I don't understand how people think they are cheaper than just wearing your own clothes confused. In what way are they cheaper?

It means that the clothes my children have to wear out of school are better quality or branded items. If there was no uniform I would still have to buy more than one of everything as I would not want them wearing expensive items to school - they would end up having "school clothes" and other clothes. Particularly in the case of primary school! None of our school uniform is expensive though.

Surely it is cheaper not to have to buy, for example, two pairs of shoes, one for school, one for weekends

Surely most children have more than one pair of shoes regardless of whether there are "school shoes"? Anyway, one pair of shoes worn all the time wears out quicker than several pairs sharing the wear.

SoupDragon · 09/03/2015 10:49

Don't they get told off about this?

Of course they do :)

Idontseeanysontarans · 09/03/2015 11:09

They do get told off Smile
My Mum told me about her grammar school days where teachers would be placed at strategic points along the school route to catch out anyone messing with the uniform or not wearing the beret, rolling the skirt up and down without being noticed became a bit of an art form in the '60's I think Grin
We would get a bit of 'it's a skirt not a belt' as we walked into school. Then be made to wear stupidly short gym skirts for pe....

ThisIsOurBlanket · 09/03/2015 11:44

Fair enough SoupDragon. I'm happy for any clothes to be worn to school (actually find the more expensive ones wash much better anyway) - plus DC just as likely to spill food or fall in the mud at home as at school, so it doesn't really make any difference. I might have a different view if they were always losing things.

DC do tend to just have one pair of shoes on the go at once - boots in cold weather, trainers in Autumn and Spring, sandals when it's hot (so they never wear sandals Grin). They tend to outgrow rather than wear them out, but I suppose it's different when they are older.

muminhants · 09/03/2015 12:10

At my son's school most of the kids don't wear coats because there are no cloakrooms and not even enough lockers to go around, so they'd have to carry them around all day.

Why do schools insist on ties for boys and not for girls? Who wears a tie in the workplace these days anyway? I suppose it looks smart but it seems a bit pointless to me.

SoupDragon · 09/03/2015 12:15

actually find the more expensive ones wash much better anyway

Paint and marker pen are happy to not wash out of both expensive and cheap clothing :o