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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not want to work FT anymore

42 replies

BeeInYourBonnet · 05/03/2015 21:23

4m ago I started working FT after working PT for the past 8y since my DCs were born. I loved working PT. The only downside was not enough time in work to get things done, but generally a great work life balance.

Now I'm FT, forced on me by employer as a result of office restructure. And I hate it! My life just feels wring now. I'm stressed and rushed all the time, my DH is pretty good but more laid back than me, and I am only just keeping on top of the bare minimum at home.

I have a pretty good job, and it would be a huge struggle to find a PT job with such good pay. I keep dreaming about jacking it all in. I do actually like my job, and enjoy it when I'm there, but it all just feels wrong at home.

Is life too short?

OP posts:

MissusThePoint · 05/03/2015 21:29

Yes, life is definitely too short. But then I am basically a lazy cow.

Are they allowed to 'force' you to go ft? Surely if a pt job was no longer available, you should have been offered redundancy? I'm no expert though, just guessing.

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 05/03/2015 21:35

Department was reorganised. My old job didn't exist in new structure, but I had opportunity to go for new FT job (promotion). If I hadn't been successful I would have been entitled to redundancy but, as I understand it, if I hadn't applied for new job it would have affected any redundancy payout.

OP posts:

Charlotte3333 · 05/03/2015 21:39

Could you pay for a cleaner to pop in twice a week at home to ease your load? I've gone back to work recently and it's gradually creeping up (the last fortnight I've done full-time, am only contracted 16 hours a week) and am already knackered trying to juggle stuff and looking at a local cleaning agency. At least that way the 'big' stuff would be done (stripping beds, hoovering everywhere etc) and you'd only have to do the bare minimum when you're home

Siennasun · 05/03/2015 21:40

I've gone from pt to ft recently and hate it too. I really think life is too short. I'm going to ask to reduce my hours. If they say no I'm going to leave. I guess it depends how much you need the job/money.

MajesticWhine · 05/03/2015 21:40

Could you carry on full time but work one day at home?

Siennasun · 05/03/2015 21:42

I've gone from pt to ft recently and I hate it too. I really think life is too short. I'm going to request reducing my hours. If it gets denied I'm going to leave. It depends how much you need the job/money.

Janethegirl · 05/03/2015 21:46

Any chance you can do your full time hours over 4 days? Where I work it is possible and some people do this.

MargoReadbetter · 05/03/2015 21:47

Do you manage to do your job now in the time available or do you still feel rushed and overworked?

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 05/03/2015 21:48

I have a cleaner 1.5h per week which is great.

We don't really need my FT salary, but we do need my PT salary iyswim. So having no job is not really an option.

I am in a mgt role, so its quite important for me to be in every day.
I am finding it stressful balancing childcare, holidays, clubs, homework.......
I am constantly worrying about where we all need to be at any one time!

OP posts:

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 05/03/2015 21:50

My job is more manageable now I am FT, but quite stressful generally.

OP posts:

Billabong21 · 05/03/2015 21:50

I feel for you. I work full time and by Thursday I've clocked up 45 hours, work 9 on Friday then at least another 10 over the weekend. Then there's all the day to day stuff!!!! If I'm honest I'm constantly exhausted. I used to get up at 0500 twicea week to fit the gym in but recently I've been too tired too.

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 05/03/2015 21:52

Blimey Billabong , thats a lotta hours. Poor you, how do you cope!

OP posts:

Billabong21 · 05/03/2015 21:53

'To' not 'too'

Billabong21 · 05/03/2015 22:08

I'm struggling BeeinYour Bonnet, I feel sick and anxious every day, but that's life as a teacher...sadly.

GokTwo · 05/03/2015 22:13

I totally understand. I've been pt for 12 years now and all but one of my colleagues has gradually followed suit! I find my job (primary teacher) absolutely fascinating but utterly exhausting. I think I would be a wreck on full time hours. On my 2 days off I look after my MIL, sort the house out and spend time with Dd. I live in absolute dread of having to go back to ft.

GokTwo · 05/03/2015 22:14

Sorry Billabong, didn't see your post. That sounds incredibly tough. I really feel for you.

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 05/03/2015 22:33

That's rubbish Billabong. I hope you manage to find some rest in the holidays - even if you do have to spend them working from home!

I am completely in denial about how I am going to manage the school holidays this year. I would feel so terrible if my DCs had to spend 6 weeks in holiday clubs. That's if I can even get them into a holiday club....

OP posts:

LilMissSunshine9 · 05/03/2015 23:15

I don't have kids and am 32 and I am already planning to get myself into a position where I can go part time because quite frankly I wasn't born to just work work work and not enjoy the world I was born into. As long as I can pay my own way feck the luxuries and designer clothes I'd far rather work less.

dwinnol · 05/03/2015 23:26

I've just reduced from FT to 4 days per week. I requested it on childcare and work/life balance grounds. The money difference is not that noticable. It's heaven. Not as heavenly as 3 days a week but one step at a time.
I only managed 2 years FT but life is just too bloody short to be in work so often.

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 06/03/2015 07:07

LilSunshine - that's exactly what I did. Positioned myself for ideal PT working, and for 8y it worked perfectly. I count myself as very lucky to have stayed in a job I enjoyed, at a senior level with good pay, on a PT basis, for that period of time. Unfortunately nothing is forever!

OP posts:

Original poster

BeeInYourBonnet · 06/03/2015 07:10

And finding a new PT job from scratch would be very difficult for me at my level. I could take a significant pay cut, but still no guarantee I would find anything. I do need to look though I think.

I am lucky with my job in one way, as I have quite a bit of flexibility and autonomy. I worry I would lose this in a new job/employer.

OP posts:

Bumblebzz · 06/03/2015 07:18

Bee have you thought about investing in better childcare? If you now work full time - in a high pressure role - relying on a mish mash of childcare (holiday clubs etc) is just adding to your stress. How about employing a nanny, either just for after school and holidays, or full time and get someone who will do general housekeeping while the children are at school. It sounds like you can afford it on your FT salary, and it will make your life a LOT easier. Plus the children can continue doing their activities and play dates etc etc as the nanny will basically offer a lot more flexibility. So they won't need to adjust their lives to the same extent.

vintagesewingmachine · 06/03/2015 07:24

I had been thinking the same thing for a while so took the plunge this week and handed in my notice to quit my full time job and go back to locum work This is much getter paid so I need to do less of it for the same money I get now for flogging myself into the ground 5 days a week. Going part time in my current job is not an option as the pay is not great. Have to admit it is a bit daunting, not having regular work but as PPs have said, life is too short and at present, I am so exhausted by friday night that the weekends are a wash out and I am not interested in doing anything other than resting and DH and the DCs understandably want me to go out as a family and have fun. I hope you find a way foward too.

BasinHaircut · 06/03/2015 07:29

I'm working 3 days since I went back after Mat leave 6 months ago and I would never go back to FT unless DH lost his job. I am really lucky that I have just got a new job (promotion) and they have allowed me to remain PT, but I'm thinking of increasing to 4 days when DS is 2 and getting a cleaner

confusedandemployed · 06/03/2015 07:32

There is nothing to stop you making a flexible working request to reduce your hours, if you can put together a good enough case to show it will work.
FWIW I think you should give it a go. Life is too short to be spending large chunks of it doing something you don't want to. I recently dropped from FT to 3 days PW (although doing more just for this month to help them out). 3 days is heaven, even though I spend them looking after 2 yo DD. I was the main earner so we've taken a big financial hit but actually, because I now watch every penny, I actually feel more in control of my money than before.

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