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Original poster

To ask how long after having a baby you DTD?

73 replies

OhMjh · 02/03/2015 16:45

Just that really. I'm coming up to 14 weeks post partum and although we haven't had sex, we've been intimate a few times. I'll admit, I'm not sure I'm looking forward to it, or how I feel about sex as a whole after having DD. I know breast feeding can make your libido non existent but I think it's to do with the fact DP and I had issues before because of his size - I'll spare you the details but I'm already convinced they might have stitched me one to high Blush

Before anyone asks or suggests, there's been no pressure whatsoever from DP; he's been a star and hasn't even mentioned it.

OP posts:
Tiptoeshoes · 02/03/2015 17:46

About 8 weeks. I bled for 6 and really didn't feel like it despite no stitches

I remember being quite scared, like I was losing my virginity again! Dh was very sweet and said no pressure,but I wanted to try.

It wasn't amazing and took awhile to really enjoy it again!

Sweetpea01 · 02/03/2015 17:51

A week after DS and about 2 weeks after DD. Both were c-sections and the bleeding stopped/started a lot. There were no concerns over pain down there obviously so we were just careful with regards to my section scar.

flippyflapper · 02/03/2015 17:52

Far too early and ended pregnant again when baby was 4 weeks old and Joe have twins. I had 3 babies in 1 year. Safe to say dh has been snipped.

I was very lucky in the fact that I had no stitches, I had c section with twins and the thought of those stitches down there make me wince.

DamsonInDistress · 02/03/2015 17:57

8 weeks with ds1 and eight months with ds2. Just so bloody knackered and exclusively breastfeeding, killed my libido dead. And frankly it's never fully recovered seven years later.

MaryWestmacott · 02/03/2015 18:08

6 weeks the first time (DH thought you weren't 'allowed' to until the 6 week check, and I hadn't actually noticed he was avoiding hte issue until he brought it up during asking me how the appointment went!), with DC2, can't remember exactly, but definately before 2 months.

I know a few woman who rocked up at their 6 week check already pregnant again. I felt terribly inferior, fancy having energy and spare time that early on and not wanting to use it for sleeping... Grin

TattyDevine · 02/03/2015 18:11

It was around the 8 week mark. It was more of a box-ticking exercise than major lustful feelings if I'm honest. It hurt a bit, even though I'd had a C-section, and it was quite a while before I realised that it was possibly because I'd had one internal examination under epidural (so they could do whatever damage they wanted without me realising) that may have made it so.

For those baulking at my box-ticking exercise, I think it probably speeded up me "wanting" to do it off my own back, so not such a bad thing, got me back in the swing of things!

TarkaTheOtter · 02/03/2015 18:17

8 weeks. But was 8 months before it felt normal.

Mousefinkle · 02/03/2015 18:39

Six weeks with DC1. Had dreadful stitches right into my butt cheek that split open and became infected after two weeks Sad so damn painful... Plus the bleeding lasted the full six weeks so we basically did it when the pain and blood was gone and then I started bleeding again for about two weeks straight!

DC2 was a much better experience. Only a couple of stitches, bleeding was lighter and only lasted a fortnight so we started DTD then.

DC3 about four/five weeks. No stitches but zero libido.

seaoflove · 02/03/2015 18:41

Seven months.

Royalsighness · 02/03/2015 18:42

I waited 3 weeks but I'd had an episiotomy, went slowly and it was great!

CuppaSarah · 02/03/2015 19:10

3 months for me. In had a second degree tear and just couldn't face it. I had similar issues with dps size and was really scared. It did hurt for the first few.times, but sex is better than ever now.

caeleth84 · 02/03/2015 19:14

15 months! But that was because our relationship was in a crap place, not because of the birth per se.

monkeyfacegrace · 02/03/2015 19:19

Dd with ex H, never again because he was a first class twat.

Ds with DH, 4 days. But ds was prem and only 4 lb ish so I wasn't injured.

Due dd2 any day now and I'm thinking Im going to ask them to just sew me up completely. Bollocks is DH coming anywhere near me for a few weeks at least. This time everything hurts already.

MrsTedCrilly · 02/03/2015 19:52

I think it was about 5 months for full sex.. And I had a c-section! I thought we'd be doing it alot earlier because of no lady garden problems, but I didn't realise how tired we'd be.. plus in baby mode so couldn't feel sexy.. And my scar didn't heal for a long time so thought any vigorous movement would open it more! DP was fantastic though and we were fine doing other things..

lolbeansansalad · 02/03/2015 19:59

5 weeks with DC1, DC2 due imminently and am desperate to get back to it as have been on pelvic rest for months. Not sure what the reality will be like though. Hmm

CuttingOutTheCrap · 02/03/2015 20:49

About 7 weeks, we took it slow, I was nervous about my stitches etc but it was fine, more than fine!

seastargirl · 02/03/2015 21:21

We tried to about 3 months after first baby, I'd had a nasty tear and a lot of stitches. It took a couple of attempts to realise that they'd stitched me up too much and no amount of relaxing was going to make him fit in. I was quickly referred to be restitched, had the op and recovery was far easier than after birth, although conceived my youngest the second time we did it.

Second baby was a section and we did it about 4 weeks after.

If your stitches are causing you pain get them checked out, it was the best thing I did.

FlabbyMummy · 02/03/2015 21:29

8 weekish, gave lots of bj's in early days.

MrsKoala · 02/03/2015 21:41

After first dc it was about 6 months. i was very damaged, had lots of scar tissue and was sewn up tight. We tried after 3 months and it was too painful (for both of us). In fact it's never been the same since, still feels uncomfortable (for both of us).

Second dc was also 6 months, but that is more because he hasn't slept longer than 2 hours and only then on one of us. We had to leave the dc with my mum and go to a hotel to do it.

DartmoorDoughnut · 02/03/2015 21:55

DS is 6 months this week and still haven't DTD yet Blush poor DH! EBF has just killed my drive, massive shock, I didn't think anything could kill it! Will be making the effort this week although its been so long (think about 8 months all in as I was MASSIVE towards the end!) that I'm rather nervous so definitely will be having a couple of glasses of something Grin

OMGBabyNo3 · 02/03/2015 21:55

11 months after DS!!! Only did it then because I thought it would be awful to get to a year!! About 7 months after DD. We don't do it much at all anymore but both ok with that. We're just knackered. Infact only done it once in last 4 months....and I'm 8 weeks pregnant!!!

HorraceTheOtter · 02/03/2015 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Charlotte3333 · 02/03/2015 22:08

At least 8 weeks with DS2, and I still felt bruised and incredibly sensitive, so we took it very slowly for a long time afterwards. It's been different, since, but not necessarily in a bad way. It's less frequent but far better than in the early days.

GingerCuddleMonster · 02/03/2015 22:12

8 days Blush but no stitches or tears just a minor graze. I had a bubble bath with arnica in it a glass of wine and we just did it. I just thought fuck it I just pushed a baby out of there I can take a penis .

it was fine dp was surprised I asked but obliged, I just wanted to get it out of the way. Having that first poo made me more nervous Grin.

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 02/03/2015 22:19

2 weeks both times following cesarean. My choice I wasn't forced by DH.