To ask you about the link between older mums having children who are diagnosed with autism

[mytartanscarf]

This is something I worry about because I will undoubtedly be an 'older mum' if I do go on to have a child.

I have a brother with autism so I am also conscious of genetic factors.

Could anyone talk to me/reassure me? :)

Both of mine have autism and I had them in my mid 20s.

Just checked the NAS website and it says that your GP can also refer you for genetics counselling. If it helps, we saw an expert at Kings College, London. The counselling was free and very thorough. I recommend it!

my sons paediatrician referred us to genetics .

X2boys, how did you get a diagnosis for your 3yo child please? By that, I mean who referred you and for what kind of assessment and how long did you wait etc? I ask as I am in touch with salt, portage and DS has had a developmental check and I have asked everyone if he can be assessed for autism and I have basically been told to wait and see and he doesn't seem to be anyone's priority. I not know how to push this further.

The developmental check was by a paediatrician, btw.

My brother doesn't have a diagnosis - is generic counselling still possible?

My parents also died very young so I wonder if I could be referred on this basis?

Interesting. I wasn't aware there was a link.
My daughter is autistic, she was born when I was nearly 40. She is my 3rd child, the other 2 are not autistic, though my middle one had delayed speech and other problems.

I would say there is a genetic link though. Both myself and my children's dad have family members on the spectrum. I believe my Dad had aspergers, though he was never diagnosed. My ex had a cousin with aspergers, we both have a nephew/niece on the spectrum.

DS1 has ASD. I was 21 when he was born.

Obvuously, some younger parents will have children with autism but in my position it would be unwise to completely ignore any links between age and autism.

Not every child who has autism will be born to older parents and nor will all older parents have children with autism.

But - it's still a niggling worry!

hiawatha my daughter was diagnosed when she was 2 1/2. My health visitor made the initial referral.
I have to say she is 'severely autistic' though, and it was kind of obvious even at that age. We were aware something was wrong when she was only a few months old.

I have a DS with autism and I was under 20 when he was born. There are enough studies though to show that there is some kind of link between maternal (and paternal) age and autism.

I think that if there is already a genetic link in the family (and even if there isn't really) then when considering whether to have a child, you have to be prepared for the fact that they might have autism. Even with genetic counselling, it won't eliminate all possibility. I think the parents of dc with autism I know who have struggled the most are those who have planned ahead in minute detail, e.g. sorted out potential schools/finances/returning to work assuming everything would be normal, and then had it fallen apart when the diagnosis came. But with children you can never assume things will be normal - and of course there are many other disabilities/additional needs that might happen as well. That is pretty much the deal when you become a parent - you just have to take the rough with the smooth, and the buck stops with you.

Hiawatha the paediatrician diagnosed him but we had salt ,portage involved he was also tested for sight,hearing etc just rule out any physical issues that may affect his development it was seven months of assessments by salt,portage and the educational psychologist, he was in nursery at this point which gave him his diagnosis starting from just after he turned three which wasent that long compared with others.They have to b e absolutly sure before they diagnose.

I think if you do have a child with autism, you will at least be partly prepared for it -- and early recognition and intervention can make a huge difference to the child.

It sounds like you and your brother had a tough time of it as children, but that needn't be what happens to your own children, whatever their needs.

My eldest was born when I was 36, she's 17 now and was diagnosed last year. My middle one was born 18 months later, again diagnosed last year. I now know that I'm autistic too (the relief!) - my youngest was born when I was 41 and the jury's out.. I think I run such an autism friendly household that his traits and quirks are accommodated and any autism he may have is not so noticeable.

Older mothers though - I don't know. I do think that I married late and had children late because of my emotional immaturity and just wasn't ready before. I believe a lot of AS people are somewhat delayed, even the high functioning ones.

the reason why he was referred in the first place to the disability team [ which include salt,portage,paediatrician ] was his severe speech delay which he still has and he will be five in may I wasent convinced it was autism initially but of course as he gets older it becomes increasingly apparent.

This is something I worry about tbh. There is definitely undiagnosed asd in my family (everyone seems to bury their heads in the sand) of various degrees perhaps inc me, and one family member has v. severe difficulties. I'm in my early 30s and my lovely dh who is so healthy is in his late 50s. Ive read about the older father link. It would never have stopped us ttc (we're 6 months pregnant) and what will be will be, we love our dd totally already, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't a bit concerned. I guess it's the unknown. But if it happens I'm sure we'll adapt.

peppermint

For me it's the terror of what might happen in the future - my poor brother struggles so much.

Tartan, I am pleased for you that you are reconsidering having children

Please stop putting obstacles in your own way, I say this as someone who does exactly the same thing!

Perhaps that should read "considering"

I had my severely autistic dd when I was 21. No autism in our family either.

I think its more likely to be inherited rather than an age thing.

Ispent this is purely very abstract - if I do meet someone I will be older when I have children, IF I do. I don't mean to sound horrible but that post sounded really condescending.

Thank you for your feedback. My 2.10 yo DS has a very severe indeed speech and language delay (no words at all) and other social communication concerns. I don't know why I cannot get an assessment for him despite salt, portage and a paed being involved.m

Oh sorry, it wasn't meant that way at all. I won't post on your threads again then,usually like to try and be supportive as you seem a bit torn sometimes. Fair dos