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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DPs ex's creation in the house?

44 replies

annabanana30 · 01/03/2015 17:14

Dp is a bit of a hoarder. We are due to move in a month or so and I'm just packing away a few non essentials.

One of the many items DP has is a framed picture that his ex (who apparently used him and treat him not too nicely and his most recent ex before he met me) made for him. It's a sort of collage of music memorabilia. This will be our 3rd and final move in 4 years and each time I ask dp, shall we give the picture to the charity shop, and he is always aghast and says no. We never have this picture up, it's always put away because it doesn't fit in with our decoration, and quite frankly I don't want anything of either dp or my exes hanging there. AIBU to want to accidentally lose the picture in the move? Tee hee hee!

OP posts:
RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 01/03/2015 17:16

Of course yabu.

crocodiledundeelady · 01/03/2015 17:18

Yes, yabu. Next!

leedy · 01/03/2015 17:18

YABU. It's up to him whether he wants to throw away mementoes of his life before you, not you.

PrettyFeet · 01/03/2015 17:18

I'd want to but it wouldn't be the right thing to do.

How would you feel if someone threw something of yours away that you wanted to keep?

TidyDancer · 01/03/2015 17:19

The 'tee hee hee' is awful. YABU.

whatadrain · 01/03/2015 17:19

I would 'lose it' or break it or 'accidentally' put it in the charity shop box... But then I'm unashamedly BU!

workhouse · 01/03/2015 17:20

YANBU Why keep something like that if it's not to be put up. It sounds hideous anyway.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 01/03/2015 17:24

It has nothing to do with whether it is hideous, or whether it is displayed or not. It is not the Op's to throw away. Her dp had a life before her - and it's up to him what he keeps from that time.

drbonnieblossman · 01/03/2015 17:26

Yabu. You're trying to erase his past and you don't have that right. Assuming you're an adult, you surely accept people have histories and he had a life before you.

SuburbanRhonda · 01/03/2015 17:26

Surely you have enough 'in or bin' decisions to make without having to decide about something that isn't even yours?

I would count yourself lucky he doesn't want to put it up. Just stick it in a cupboard as you've done before. You won't even remember you've got it until you move again.

EatShitDerek · 01/03/2015 17:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

workhouse · 01/03/2015 17:30

Carting useless mementoes from house to house, what on earth is the point in that. I'm with you OP.

ahbollocks · 01/03/2015 17:32

If its memorabilia it migh be valuable, maybe that's why he wants to keep it?

ahbollocks · 01/03/2015 17:33

If it wasnt valuable id probably chuck it Blush
Not proud of that!

Andrewofgg · 01/03/2015 17:34

I have no photos of exes - but I do have some of groups in which they figure. OP would that bother you too?

oldcroneat39 · 01/03/2015 17:34

Oh yes. How awful that he doesn't reject all of a situation and can salvage some good and positive things with sentimentality?
No, wait.
YABU

SolidGoldBrass · 01/03/2015 17:35

Get over yourself and leave your DP's stuff alone. It's a picture, not an elephant - it can't take up much space.

Yellowbird54321 · 01/03/2015 17:36

" a sort of collage of music memorabilia"

Hm not sure op - think we really need to see a photo of said collage in order to judge properly Grin

Joyfulldeathsquad · 01/03/2015 17:37

I have a book an ex made me. It's got hand drawn pictures and a poem about me in it. I've kept it for 20 years. Not because it has any romantic attachments to it but because some one went through so much effort and it's quite beautiful.

Just stick it out of sight somewhere

Rivercam · 01/03/2015 17:39

I can fully understand why you don't a keepsake from an earlier relationship. However, as others have said, put it in the loft and forget about it.

AyMamita · 01/03/2015 17:42

I would bin it. YANBU!

DinoMight · 01/03/2015 17:47

Just stick it away in the far end of the loft and forget about it. At least he's not suggesting it should be on display anywhere, then I might have to object.

MrsTedCrilly · 01/03/2015 17:49

YABU- keep but store at the bottom of a pile of stuff in the back of the loft Wink

landrover · 01/03/2015 17:51

How big is it? If its big, can you or him ask ex if they want it back?

ScotsWhaHae · 01/03/2015 17:51

Yabu. It's not like he's transporting it in a climate controlled environment and expecting it to be professionally hung in a prominent position.