I'm a scruff. Maybe that's a bad thing, I don't know, but that's how it is.
Dh likes things neat and tidy, and that's fine too. He's the majority stay at home parent so mostly things go his way.
I find it very very difficult to give a stuff what the house looks like, but I really do try not to impact others. So I never leave washing up long enough that it will impact someone else being able to use the kitchen for instance, but I may well leave pots for a couple of hours and do them late in the evening or even early the next morning. If he wants my stuff out of the way he only has to say and I will drop everything and get it sorted, but its not usually my way to be right onto it. Mostly dh will sneak into the kitchen and do it himself which makes me feel guilty if its only my mess, but equally I don't like being dictated to that it must be done right then if there's no need.
I like to have stuff around. Dh gets very cross with this and is permanently tidying my stuff. He got very arsey last night that i had left a book I was reading, and some newly opened post on the dining table. So he tidied my book (and lost the page). I was hunting all over for it, and when I found it in the bookcase I was bloody annoyed, I'd only put it down for half an hour. So I had a bit of a moan at him, and he got all 'the dining table is for dining, the bookcase is for books'. I really don't like being dictated to as to how I should use our joint furniture. If I want to use a surface to put stuff on, then I will.
Well, it turned into a bit of a minor row. He thinks no-one should complain since he does all this tidying, but it's unnecessary and not even always wanted. I like to have a bit of stuff around. I'm not talking piles of rubbish, but I do like a few books around, a jumper, some work bits etc, it feels much nicer. i also like the kids to be able to have things around, but they can't bring toys out of their (very small) bedrooms before he starts dropping hints that its time to tidy away. And if they leave drawings etc around he immediately bins them. Sometimes they have been given to me as a gift and I've put them down ready to display and before I've got chance they've been binned.
His argument is that we should compromise, but I already am! When living on my own my house was miles messier than this. He also says that tidy is a good thing. I understand this concept, but I don't think it has to be absolute. As long as things are reasonably clean then I don't think 'super tidy' is any better than 'reasonably tidy' and is just an extra waste of effort, and makes the home feel completely non-homely to me.