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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask ladies of a certain (menopausal) age

34 replies

Silvercatowner · 28/02/2015 20:45

to tell me whether my experience is extreme? I have timed my hot flushes (using a contraction timer app) and I am flushing, on average, every 35 minutes. Last night I woke up in a flush 5 times. Is this extreme? I am honestly struggling at work with tiredness, and with the discomfort of a regular flushes. I am not able to take HRT at the moment (I'm desperate to go back on it).

OP posts:
Eva50 · 28/02/2015 20:55

It sounds fairly extreme to me. I assume I am well into the menopause (haven't had a period for over a year and only a couple the year before that) and I have only had an odd flush. I may just be lucky though. Hope it doesn't start now!

tealady · 28/02/2015 20:58

Sounds pretty bad to me. Have you been to the Dr? If you cant go on HRT maybe look at some of the natural alternatives and also make sure you do everything possible to be comfortable. Cotton clothing, particularly at night. Fan at the ready, carry water etc. I found if I was able to do the right thing as the flush started they would go quickly (ie stay calm, be cool etc) whereas if I was busy, stressed, had too many clothes on they would last longer.

You have my sympathy - I'm very glad mine are over.

Do go and see your doctor though.

OrinocoTheWomble · 28/02/2015 21:16

I am sure someone more knowledgeable will be along shortly! I am peri too. Been taking HRT for last 2 weeks. Moods already improved (still a bit miserable though!). Before HRT I had some night sweats (bloody awful), they only lasted 3 weeks. I took Black Cohosh (from Higher Nature) and it appeared to make them disappear.

HawthornLantern · 28/02/2015 21:36

Sounds quite similar to me, Silvercat I have gone through this phase a couple of times - it went on for a few weeks each time but the last time it began I just went to the doctor and begged for help.

Based on the reaction of the friendly doctor (female, also having her own symptoms) I think it is at least moderately severe. It's probably possible to have it worse but it's plenty bad enough.

I am sure you are right and HRT would be the best and quickest option if you were able to have it but in the USA there is one non-hormonal treatment available. It's called Brisdelle. I'm currently in the US and my doctor offered it to me - obviously I don't know if its equivalent is available at home.

Apparently it was originally developed for depression but was found to have the helpful side effect of tackling hot flushes.

Good luck - I feel for you!

Original poster
Silvercatowner · 28/02/2015 21:45

Thanks for all the perspectives.

OP posts:
RuthAaaghhh · 28/02/2015 22:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ShotgunNotDoingThePans · 28/02/2015 22:08

They do sound like the beginnings of something Ruth.
I found Vosgel sage tablets a godsend when I was suffering. Worked in about a week - and they come back when the bottle runs out and I forget to replace it straight away.

OhFlippityBolax · 28/02/2015 22:10

Can I ask a question please ladies? By my family history I'm 15 years or so away from menopause but it still worries me

I've been told if you had a horrible puberty you'll have a horrible menopause. Does this hold true with any of you? Puberty was horrific for me and made me extremely unwell I don't want to go through it again! Lol

LindyHemming · 28/02/2015 22:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Suzannewithaplan · 28/02/2015 22:16

IME flushes can be brought on by stress, find I get them for a few weeks or so then they die down for a bit.
I find them sort of amusing, since I was formerly an always too cold type but they don't seem like something that I'd feel the need to seek medical treatment for.
I guess mine must be fairly mild?
I do get that waking up several times a night feeling very hot and sweating thing also
(I am 49 no periods for about a year now) ?

TheIncidentalGoat · 28/02/2015 22:23

I'm 50 plus, well menopausal according to my fsh bloods, not taking HRT. My flushes had been dreadful for a few weeks and then settled for 4 or 5 months and now back again. I don't think it's coincidental that my exercise regime has dropped off recently (weather/injury). I'm desperate to get back to it properly to see if it beats the flushes back into submission.

I'm also going to go back to taking vit b complex and vit E as this seemed to help last time.

FuckyNell · 28/02/2015 22:30

Since changing to Oestrogel and utrogestan my hot flushes have gone away wooooooooo!!!! They used to still push through tablet hrt. Felt just like my face was on fire. Attractive.

Grin

I'm 43 btw

ArgyMargy · 28/02/2015 22:30

Help yourself by cutting down on caffeine and alcohol, increase water intake and exercise. Lose weight if you're overweight. (I also drink a glass of soya milk every day, which helps me, but may be irrelevant.) Much better approach to mid-life than popping pills, IMO.

FuckyNell · 28/02/2015 22:33

If you're under 50 you NEED hrt in your life!

I cba to get involved in a debate though tonight (maybe tomorrow Wink)

Just check out www.menopausematters.co.uk for info.

Night night

Original poster
Silvercatowner · 28/02/2015 22:40

Ruth my hot flushes are overwhelming, a feeling of heat inside my chest that rises into my face - it feels as if I am standing in front of a fire. It is accompanied by a feeling of discomfort, not exactly panic but not far off. I find it intensely disconcerting. I'm 53. I don't find them remotely amusing, especially when I am chairing a formal meeting or talking to groups of people.

OP posts:
takingstock · 28/02/2015 22:42

I have had hot flushes for four years. Took various vitamins, lost weight, etc but nothing worked. Have just very reluctantly gone onto HRT and all my symptoms have gone. I no longer have to run off to the loo at work with my embarrassing red, sweaty face, I can wear whatever I like and my sleep has improved. I would love to have gone through my menopause naturally but like my birth experiences, I am not a "natural". I have no shame in taking advantage of modern medicine. It is not a competition.

notsogoldenoldie · 01/03/2015 06:03

silver that does sound extreme. I didn't have them as frequently as you, but I had that awful panicky feeling too coupled with extreme and sudden fatigue. Not funny. I was denied treatment, so I took Menopace for a while then started getting some proper regular exercise. That helped.

I no longer get the flushes, thankfully. I'm 55 now.

Flowers
Scotchmincepie · 01/03/2015 06:28

Nothing wrong with taking HRT if you haven't got a family history that makes it a risk. And if it us a risk it's worth talking to gp about how much of a risk. It transformed my life and frankly I was a mess before taking it, a hormonal depressed wreck. Also started peri young - 38 - so taking hrt provides protection against osteoporosis.

Some women don't need it, but if you are under 50 the protection it gives is helpful.

I too find exercise really helps with the night sweats, also taking promensil. Don't really get hot flushes.

notanative · 01/03/2015 07:27

Mine started last summer.After two months off hot flushes I just had to get the medication .Where I work there is no real air-con and during summer time it is near 30 degrees celsius and my job is very fysical. I had hot flushes every 15 min.After medication I still get them but they are nothing compared what they used to be and my sleep is much better.Go and talk to your doctor.

LindyHemming · 01/03/2015 07:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

piggychops · 01/03/2015 08:05

The HRT and age thing is interesting as my GP said under 45 not 50, and over 45 she would send for a bone scan first.

Toooldtobearsed · 01/03/2015 08:07

I went through the menopause very suddenly and early, and was exactly the same as you OP, so it does not sound extreme to me, but may well be, if natural.
I could not take HRT (breast cancer), and tried everything. My Oncologist suggested Black Cohosh. Did nothing for me, but might be worth a try?

It really is horrible, you have my sympathy.

piggychops · 01/03/2015 08:11

Euphaemia from what I understand, the HRT is great for the symptoms but at some point you are supposed to stop it and if you aren't really careful, you then go through it all.

carabos · 01/03/2015 09:17

I'm 51, periods still happening but fairly irregular. I'm a size 8 and a gym bunny, I eat clean and don't drink alcohol. My night sweats are horrendous. I haven't slept in a year and some nights barely sleep at all. The sweats start lower down in my body, usually back of knees, then creep up until my chest and back neck are running wet. My hair is always wet when I wake up. I hardly ever have them during the day.

Swears happen half a dozen times a night, accompanied by needing to get up to wee. I'm trying to tough it out - having spent 5 years fighting off a hysterectomy, I don't want to cave now! However, I think I'll give some of the natural remedies a try as I can't go on like this. I'm utterly exhausted. It's as bad as 2 years breastfeeding a baby who fed every 45 min round the clock and I was younger then (obvs) Wink.

DH and I have single duvets on the bed, which means we can adjust accordingly- I'm about to change my winter one for summer and hope that helps.

BIWI · 01/03/2015 09:21

I'm through and out the other side now - hurrah!

Things that worked for me:

Boots Menolieve
Cutting down carbs. I'm a long-term low carber anyway, but really noticed when I was on holiday once, and was eating a much higher carb diet than normal, how much worse the flushes were - I was waking up several times a night with them.
Cut down caffeine and alcohol

I didn't want to take HRT (my mum died from breast cancer and had also been on HRT).

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