to do a straw poll of separated parents?

[MsColouring]

How do you communicate with your ex? Does anyone use a contact book?

We talk, phone, text, he comes to my house to see DS, we hang out.
But then we get on fine.

Usually by text, but if it's something that would take ages to text or something that could be misconstrued by text, phone. It depends how good your relationship with ex is though

Occasional email if absolutely necessary, or a text at a push, but most of the time we don't communicate at all.

A friend's ex insisted on a book, but most of the time it was given to her with a demand in it for the next weekend and she had no opportunity to say no until it was too late and her ex would "go off on one".

I think something more instant is better.

verbally - I see him most days and we talk

also by text

We have had a book for three years but I'm no longer prepared to use it. It meant I was giving information about the children from 2 weeks ago plus he kept losing them when they had dates in. I want to use e-mail or a web based tool so we can keep a joint calendar with no confusion over dates. His solicitor insists that a contact book is common practice - I'm not convinced. We are way beyond telephone conversations or face to face conversations!

I have a pretty good relationship with my ex, so we use the normal methods of communication.

What does your solicitor say? Is there a way that the use of the communication book could be improved? How has the suggestion of using an online calendar been met?

Text here.

Online calendar suggestion ignored. E-mail refused. I respond direct to his solicitor, stopped using a solicitor when divorce was finalised.

Maybe if you want to change the agreement, you should appoint another solicitor to help you do that.

My parents were divorced. They never spoke. Ever. This is before text and email.

Pretty grim.

We get on OK so text, talk, email etc. I see him most days as he's been taking ds1 to school instead of him getting the school bus. Is the contact book so you don't have to see each other. If so then I would have thought email would be better as it's instant and can't go astray.

Ex has PMed me once through facebook after almost ten years of silence/ignoring/fuckwittery.

I ignored it.

Email mostly or if it's serious then phone but mine are teens now so don't need to be in touch very often.

I'll get flamed for this, but once a month I tend to get a slightly unreasonable rant which I take with a pinch of salt

[snort]

We get on ok so mainly text, occasional phone calls about the kids, and in person 2-3 times a week when dropping/collecting the dcs.

Especially once they had kids, his wife2 and I sorted things. Otherwise, he would make a mess for one, the other, or both of us re: different school schedules and such.

We text, email, talk and see each other but also get on really well

My daughter is now 24 so no need really to communicate. The last time I communicated by e-mail was about 6 years ago and I told him if he ever wants to communicate with me again. he is to do it through a solicitor.
Strangely enough I haven't heard anything

Text. He rings every other night for a short while but speaks to DCs only.

Minimal face-to-face and minimal telephone - only when absolutely necessary. I keep things nice and amicable on the surface for the DCs but would struggle to do this for more than a minute face-to-face.

Does your ex not ring your DCs? If he does he should be asking them about their day. Surely he should also contact their school directly? I realise not all situations are the same but there should not be an onus on you to supply a contact book.

I don't know too many separated parents but none of us have contact books.

Madasa. Funny how a good solicitor affects things.

We talk, phone, text, he comes to my house to see DS, we hang out.
But then we get on fine. - as Ehric says - mostly

Sorry - that was quoting ehric's post

We talk on the phone, text, email or I go out to the car when he is picking up dropping off if I want to ask/tell him something. We go to parents evening together. Once or twice a year we will meet up for a drink and have a general chat about how the kids are doing. We have been divorced for 7 years, time helps. We don't really have anything to argue about now.

I have never heard of a contact book. When things were difficult we used email more.

He texts the week before xmas or any other occasion that requires a present and asks what she wants, I tell him she's been bought everything she's asked for as most people like to get organised and asked me weeks ago, I may get a text back with an excuse why he won't be able to see her or I may not and there will be no contact until the next special occasion.

She's 4 in a few weeks so I'm expecting the annual birthday text. She's not seen him since her last birthday and she's not missed him, he's not asked to see her.

I considered a contact book but then I realised that that required contact so was a little uneccesary for us.