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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH just referred to me as "an attractive lady"

166 replies

EddieStobbart · 24/02/2015 21:34

This was his response to my whinge observation that he never pays me a compliment (after being freaked by someone commenting that pictures of my younger self look like a completely different person).

AIBU to think is this a bit weird and creepy? And def NOT a stealth boast...

OP posts:
LineRunner · 26/02/2015 21:52

farewellfigure 'I think he was afraid.' Grin

Crocodopolis · 26/02/2015 22:00

This thread is priceless.

Sparrowlegs248 · 26/02/2015 22:12

Crying at Alan Rickman!

Biggles398 · 26/02/2015 22:27

I think the only compliment my OH has ever paid me was shortly after we met. He told me I had rugby player legs. He swears to this day that it was a compliment.

I once got told that I had lovely eyes. The chap then said "Are they your own?" ....

LuluJakey1 · 26/02/2015 23:24

DH once said to me I reminded him of a 'younger Sarah Lancashire but without the chin, not as tall and a bit heftier than she is'. He thought it was a compliment.

Number3cometome · 27/02/2015 10:26

Last night I got my eyelashes done:

OH: "eyelashes look nice babe, you look like you have eyes now"
Me: Hmm

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 27/02/2015 12:46

Bless his cotton socks op ltb

My dh once asked me if I let dd6 do my makeup Confused

Miggsie · 27/02/2015 13:04

I was doing my new exercise routine which is so tough I want to give it up and I said to DH "I do wonder if all this is really worth it", and he replied "I think you are more attractive now than in all the time we have been together"

We've been together 25 years.
I cried (for joy!)

See, not all men are crap at compliments!
But then DH was once dubbed "an honorary woman" by my mightily radical feminist friend so he might not be typical.

stinkingbishop · 27/02/2015 13:13

Good to hear of this universal shitness!

We were looking through old pics the other day. Came across some Uni ones of me looking particularly hot IMHO.

DP: I'm so glad I met you when I did and not then. I'd have just assumed you were totally out of my league.

Nice to know I've now wrinkled and sagged my way down to his...He STILL doesn't understand why that was NOT a compliment!

HellKitty · 27/02/2015 15:32

I've just 'ombré - d' my hair and DP has noticed.
'It was better before, it hasn't put me off you or anything. You look like you should be on Jeremy Kyle.'
Hmmm. LTB?

GoodbyeToAllOfThat · 27/02/2015 15:57

You look like you should be on Jeremy Kyle

Ouch.

HellKitty · 27/02/2015 16:08

I know!!! Confused

MoreBeta · 27/02/2015 16:14

I always go for a factual response when DW poses these sorts of questions.

DW: Do you still find me attractive?

Me: Well I'm still here aren't I?

There you go. Irrefutable fact based evidence. Never fails.

ApocalypseThen · 27/02/2015 16:16

In a blatant, pathetic, transparent bid for reassurance, seven months pregnant me said to my husband:

"I feel huge!"

He said:

"You're pregnant, what did you expect?"

Somehow, I didn't feel better.

Minx you, he didn't give me a single compliment at our wedding - not even in his speech so I should know better than ask.

KatieScarlettreregged · 27/02/2015 16:20

She's probably sticking pins in a wax doll with a lock of your hair MoreBeta
Have you increased your life insurance recently?
Grin

ScrambledSmegs · 27/02/2015 16:23

Former bf (a long time ago when I was young and, in retrospect, rather pretty) - You scrub up alright.

Current DH (note use of current) - You look nice with make-up on.

Just nice?

HellKitty · 27/02/2015 16:26

Yes. Just had the 'nice' argument about my Jeremy Kyle hair.
CURTAINS ARE 'NICE' ffs.

off to buy brown hair dye

ScrambledSmegs · 27/02/2015 16:28

And note the implication "and without makeup you look shit"!

Yes, Hellkitty. Fucking nice.

Alibabsandthe40Musketeers · 27/02/2015 16:31

Beta if that is not a case of damning with faint praise then I don't know what is Grin

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 27/02/2015 16:32

hellkitty We need a photo of your hair!

hellsbellsmelons · 27/02/2015 16:44

9 months pregnant and I ask then DH
'Pplease say something to cheer me up. I feel so fat and ugly.'
His response - Well you don't sweat much for a fat bird!
Made me laugh and cry all at the same time!
He could be quite funny when he wanted.

Purpleme · 27/02/2015 17:41

A few weeks into our relationship, my DH kindly explained to me the difference between beautiful and attractive. I fell, even then, in the latter category.

On my wedding day, I 'looked good in the dress'.

The best I got for years after that was 'nice jumper/scarf'... but only if he had bought the jumper/scarf.

A couple of years ago we went to an initial assessment for Relate. When asked about my best features he noted 'good at her job and good mother'.

More recently, he has noted in public that our au pair is 'pretty'.

Should I divorce him?

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 27/02/2015 17:50

purple Sad ltb

Nancy66 · 27/02/2015 17:57

internet date from about 12 years ago:

"I've always dated model types in the past and it's been my downfall so I've made a pact to go out with more ordinary looking girls...starting with you.'

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 27/02/2015 17:59

Nancy How hard did you knee him in the nuts?

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