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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To refuse this leave request for first anniversary holiday

151 replies

Clockingoff · 24/02/2015 15:25

A woman in work was married a year ago on Sunday. Her husband surprised her with tickets to New York for St Patrick's day and a few days before and after (I'm in Ireland). The problem is that because it's a holiday time here, a number of staff have already booked days off that week and I really can't afford to let anyone else go without other staff being asked to work overtime (which will eat into the overtime budget.)

The same thing happened for her 30th birthday last year. He booked a surprise holiday to Paris and I got one day's notice that she would need three days off (and we had a large conference during one of those days so I had to 'borrow' someone from another team to cover).

I hate to say no as the tickets have been bought and she's very excited. But on the other hand I'm getting a bit fed up of these surprises that put me and colleagues in a difficult situation.

WIBU to say that due to shortage of staff it's just not possible to approve her leave, and come across as a complete cow.

OP posts:
ILoveMyMonkey · 24/02/2015 15:34

YANBU, I think it should be a no or unpaid leave to cover the overtime costs incurred by the short notice and number of staff who have already booked time off.

angelos02 · 24/02/2015 15:34

yy to everything jimmycracker says. If staff start seeing that this is the way to get last minute leave whenever they fancy, I can see what you will be faced with next.

sweetheart · 24/02/2015 15:34

If you feel there is a legitimate business reason for refusing then you can. You could offer for her to take unpaid leave which would release some money from your overtime budget to pay other people. Or perhaps your company should have a policy that annual leave needs to be booked with a minimum notice of 1 week?

Pootles2010 · 24/02/2015 15:35

I would say just this once, if she can arrange cover. And tell her to give your email address to her dh.

RandomFriend · 24/02/2015 15:36

What shovetheholly said. Let her go this time, but explain the implications these surprise requests for leave have. Tell her that if it happens again and it has these type of implications then you would refuse.

Why can't she and her DP plan their holidays together? If she doesn't want to do that, then her DH should plan the surprise with you so that you can allow for the time off.

BathtimeFunkster · 24/02/2015 15:37

I think you should approve it but make it clear that you are very unimpressed with her husband's use of "surprise" trips away to force you into granting leave at short notice.

Imagine being married to someone who did this to you all the time?

All big gestures you have to be grateful for and no input into your own holidays.

Ugh.

QueenofallIsee · 24/02/2015 15:37

I would say no, the needs of the business simply won't allow it and other team members followed proper process in getting permission ahead of booking. My boss would tell me where to go if this was me and I would not allow my staff to get away with this for the 2nd time! I mean really.

BathtimeFunkster · 24/02/2015 15:39

Actually, no - offering unpaid leave is better.

Then you aren't stopping her from going, but there are still consequences and your budget is protected.

trevortrevorslattery · 24/02/2015 15:40

Another vote for unpaid leave - then you aren't being mean to her as you're still allowing her to go, but also being fair to the rest of the team and the budget.

LokiBear · 24/02/2015 15:41

Can you tell her she has to take it as unpaid leave to recoup some of your costs?

Clockingoff · 24/02/2015 15:43

Thanks for the replies. I will tell her that she must either find someone to agree to cancel their leave and cover for her, or the leave will have to be taken unpaid in order to provide for overtime.

I feel like a bit of a cow, but I have to draw the line somewhere I suppose.

OP posts:
MythicalKings · 24/02/2015 15:43

I would say no. If she still goes make it unpaid leave.

Becles · 24/02/2015 15:43

Offer unpaid leave. Follow up by writing to express your concern that this is the second time her plans have adversely affected the team, then send an email to the entire team cc'd to HR reminding them of the process for booking annual leave, and attaching the company policy.

MimiSunshine · 24/02/2015 15:44

Can you say you can only authorise it as unpaid leave? I know that doesn't solve your staffing issue but may cause her (if its not so much a surprise) and her DH to think twice in the future.

Use it as an opportunity to let her know that this will no longer tolerated but you understand its been booked so unpaid leave is the only option this time. However the business cant afford to pay her wages and cover for those days.

SoMuchForSubtlety · 24/02/2015 15:46

If there's no way to cover it then I would say no. But only if there is really absolutely no way to cover it, otherwise it's a bit mean to say no.

I'd also remind all staff of the leave booking policy for busy times. If the rules are clear then it makes it easier to be fair to everyone.

OnlyLovers · 24/02/2015 15:49

Good solution, OP.

And I agree that this would be a good time to remind the whole team of the company leave policy.

MimiSunshine · 24/02/2015 15:49

Grin cross post with everyone. I don't think you are a cow, the actions of her DH have consequences which impact the company she works for therefore she needs to be aware of the impact and rectify accordingly.

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 24/02/2015 15:50

I know this will make me sound mean, but I don't think you should grant the leave. It is clearly tricky for you, for business reasons, and it sends a very unfair message to other staff.

It would tell staff that either your "give notice for hols" rules can be ignored, or, that they do stand, but that this person is getting special treatment.

It would be particularly unfair on staff who may well have wanted to take short notice hols/ had partners who wanted to surprise them, but didn't request it because they knew it contravened leave booking arrangements.

RandomFriend · 24/02/2015 15:51

Unpaid leave is a good idea. That allows her to go and allows you to balance your budget.

BathtimeFunkster has a good point: help her by explaining that you are unimpressed by these surprises.

Parkend · 24/02/2015 15:51

Her husband must be a bit dense. Why does he think his wife will be able to take time off at short notice?

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 24/02/2015 15:51

Another cross post! :-)

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 24/02/2015 15:51

I think you are doing the right thing.

In my job (a branch of a nationwide company) our Manager is only allowed to authorise a certain amount of holiday in any given week. Emergency holiday (if there is such a thing!) for a week where the maximum number of people are already off will only be considered on an unpaid basis.

Surprise holiday or not, expecting leave at such short notice over a bank holiday is taking the piss TBH. Asking is not taking the piss, expecting to get it because the tickets are booked is!

lottiegarbanzo · 24/02/2015 15:52

Good solution.

Either her husband is being an idiot by not checking with you first, or she knew she wouldn't be able to get leave, so they've cooked up this second 'surprise' as a ruse, after it worked last time.

Blatherskite · 24/02/2015 15:53

That sounds like a good compromise. She needs to pass the message back to her husband that while it's a sweet idea, it's just not practical a lot of the time and he needs to give more notice in future.

drbonnieblossman · 24/02/2015 15:54

Grant it or she will throw a sicky and you end up on a worse position as she will have retained those days of annual leave for use at a later date.

When she comes back, ask her to mention to her DH that in future, and to avoid a possible "no" on another occasion, he should discretely contact you to book the time off, ensuring that no one is left in the lurch/disappointed.