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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To spend �20 on a dinner party?

76 replies

startrek90 · 22/02/2015 19:07

Just that really. We have 2 friends coming for dinner tomorrow night and its the last time I see one of them before she returns to the US. There are 4 of us total. We don't drink. I think thats reasonable for a main and desert for the 4 of us but DH thinks I am stingy and we should do something fancier. What do you think?

OP posts:
ICantDecideOnAUsername · 22/02/2015 19:33

Nilbyname I love chorizo, that cassoulet sounds amazing - any chance of the recipe?

Startrek sorry, you lost me on 'Vegas', what's that?

DamnBamboo · 22/02/2015 19:35

Thought she meant vegan instead of vegas but if she's serving pavlova, unless you can make them without eggs whites, that ain't right.

Trills · 22/02/2015 19:36

Veg most likely

Original poster
startrek90 · 22/02/2015 19:37

sorry Vegas=veg. Autocorrect fail. As mentioned none of us drink alcohol or have tea or coffee. Drinkswise we usually just have squash or fruit juice or alcohol free beer. What would people suggest I cook? I could maybe use fresh ideas. Budget isn't tight I am just used to shopping frugally. I have done all my life as I never had enough now I am married to a man with decent money I still can't let myself go. Especially as I am a SAHM and I just feel awkward spending my husbands money on myself or my friends

OP posts:
KitKat1985 · 22/02/2015 19:41

Is it a veggie menu op? Maybe if you want to add to your meal a bit do a simple salad as a starter. Halloumi and mixed olive would be nice. Also if you're not having alcohol I'd probably get some shloer or something to drink with dinner. FWIW, I think your menu sounds lovely. xx

thatsucks · 22/02/2015 19:41

Pissing myself at all the speculation about Vegas!

JanineStHubbins · 22/02/2015 19:42

To be honest, if it was a 'last supper' for a friend before they moved abroad, I'd probably push the boat out a bit.

nilbyname · 22/02/2015 19:44

chorizo
Fry off some
Red onion- low and slow, then add in some thin sliceed-
Red pepper, courgette, carrot and add in your chorizo slices, fry off till the chorizo is just starting to turn golden at the edges, then thow in a can of drained butter beans, a bottle of pasata, 3 crushed cloves of garlic, a small sprinkling of chilli flakes and some fresh basil. Let it all simmer together for 20 mins. Serve piping hot!

Bowlersarm · 22/02/2015 19:44

I think you should just cook a nice meal for your friends and if it comes in at £20 then sobeit, but it sounds like money isn't an issue and if it goes over then sobeit as well. It's a non issue. Surely. What have I missed?

Bogeyface · 22/02/2015 19:44

I am a SAHM and I just feel awkward spending my husbands money on myself or my friends

Forget the meal, this is your real problem.

Why is it his money? You are a family, it is family money. Does he view it as his or as joint money?

strawberryangel · 22/02/2015 19:46

£20 for 4 people would be a nice meal I'd say. You could do a roast chicken, or a lovely homemade lasagne, or a curry. I don't think it sounds cheap at all!!

mrsminiverscharlady · 22/02/2015 19:48

I was going to say YANBU because it isn't necessarily about what you spend. However my DH once made stuffed aubergines for dinner and I cried Blush Yeah, pathetic I know but I would be really hungry if that was the main course.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 22/02/2015 19:51

Agree that if you're not a strict budget then just buy what you need/want and concentrate on having a nice evening and not fretting about whether it's under 20 quid or not. Get nice nibbles, decent bread, some Bottlegreen or something and cook something you feel comfortable with but a bit 'special' as it's an occasion that you'll all hopefully remember for a while.

Original poster
startrek90 · 22/02/2015 19:54

Bogeyface. DH views the money as family money and gets exasberated when I get all frugal to make my maternity pay last the month. I just feel odd. I always paid my way and I just feel like a scrounger. DH thinks I am silly but its how I feel. I am not earning....just existing.

OP posts:
Original poster
startrek90 · 22/02/2015 19:57

Do people have suggestions for something fancy? I can't use fish as my friend hates it.

OP posts:
Bowlersarm · 22/02/2015 19:57

But it's you that's putting a budget on an evening with friends. Your Dh doesn't want you - as a couple - looking inhospitable. Surely you can be frugal for the rest of the month if that's what you want?

WipsGlitter · 22/02/2015 20:01

Does it have to be veggie?

yetanotherchangename · 22/02/2015 20:08

I would do something like a chicken and apricot tagine with cous cous, followed by a lemon and rose syllabub (just whipped cream, sugar, rose water and lemon juice and peel) with almond biscuits allrecipes.co.uk/recipe/28807/easy-almond-biscuits.aspx.

Posh, but doable on a budget depending on what you have in a store cupboard.

Agree that this is your family money you are spending on entertaining as a couple so you shouldn't necessarily scrimp.

yetanotherchangename · 22/02/2015 20:09

If you're veggie, I do that as a chickpea tagine rather than a chicken one.

ChipDip · 22/02/2015 20:12

Stuffed Aubergine isn't that filling. I would definitely think that's a snack/ starter. Even a veg pasta/lasagne sounds better. Or a lovely veg curry or two?

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 22/02/2015 20:14

What about if you buy those M&S or Waitrose 'Dinner for 2' things? I think they're £10 each - and includes wine.

QuestionsaboutDS · 22/02/2015 20:16

I think if it's a posh veggie meal for four that you've put a lot of work into then it could easily cost less than a fiver a head and still be very impressive - especially if you have access to cheap market/Lidl veg. The cost is neither here nor there - it's the level of effort and making sure that nobody goes hungry that's important. Pavlova is always impressive (IMO) but cheap (although strawberries in February may not be the best choice of topping).

But don't scrimp for the sake of it if you as a family have the money to spend. I remember how it's difficult to get your head around spending money when you're on maternity leave, but don't compromise a special evening for the sake of a tenner.

Original poster
startrek90 · 22/02/2015 20:19

how do you make apricot and chicken tangine? sounds fabulous :) we are not veggie but am trying to eat more veggie meals as its cheaper) and will help me lose weight as well as helping me get my 5 a day. (I don't really like fruit Blush

OP posts:
Janethegirl · 22/02/2015 20:23

Stuffed peppers with veggie haggis or cous cous with peppers, mushrooms, onions would be a good starter then veggie curry with rice and poppadoms as a main or veggie kebabs with rice as a main. There is plenty of veggie options that are cheap and tasty.

countessmarkyabitch · 22/02/2015 20:33

I don't understand why you would cost a dinner for a few friends? Just cook some food, whatever you think they might like. What does it matter what it costs?