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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've just thrown a banana skin on a car parked over our drive.

58 replies

SilenceInTheLibrary · 21/02/2015 22:31

I really have. Dh says IABU. I'm just fed up with people parking over our drive. Polite notes, going in to the village pub to ask them them move, a polite sign on the wall does nothing. I'm just fed up.

OP posts:
Original poster
SilenceInTheLibrary · 21/02/2015 23:31

Well they've gone now. As expected - pub chucking out time. The dog's heard them and started barking because we were sitting in the front room - I opened the door to the hallway, and stood just by the front door in case they thought to do anything to my car (which was dh's fear) and I just heard a male voice say 'ugh' and 'fucking weirdos' Grin and then they drove away. Ha ha. Next time they'll get worse than banana and apple peel Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
SilenceInTheLibrary · 21/02/2015 23:33

Thanks MNers.

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Sidge · 21/02/2015 23:34

Write on the windscreen in lipstick. It's a bugger to get off but isn't classed as criminal damage.

Kikiw123 · 21/02/2015 23:41

On holiday in Majorca a few years back I saw a car with "do not park here again" scraped in to the drivers door.

whatsthatcomingoverthehill · 21/02/2015 23:45

Call the police and tell them you suspect they are drink driving.

Original poster
SilenceInTheLibrary · 21/02/2015 23:46

i have tried notes under the windscreen wipers which have ranged from a polite:

"please do not park over our drive"

to a less polite "You are blocking a private garage and driveway, you cannot block us in like this"

-To a very tired and emotional "If you are fortunate enough to be our guests on Xmas Day/Easter Sunday you may park over over our drive, however you are not, so please don't".

Admittedly dh often makes a note of the numberplates - we don't seem to have repeat offenders. It's always randoms, who think they're the only ones to have ever thought of it - and it's ok 'cos it's them.

Don't park over someone's drive, people- not even for 'just a few minutes' and not even 'just this once'.

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SistersOfPercy · 22/02/2015 00:04

Next time you pass an art shop or even the works actually get yourself a can of spray mount.
It's the stuff artists user to mount their work and it's very sticky. Print out a couple of a4 signs with something like "you are obstructing a private drive" and spray mount to the driver side window.

This stuff does come off but it will have them scrubbing at the window for an hour to fully remove its residue.
Grin

cruikshank · 22/02/2015 00:17

Spray-paint 'Cock Piss Partridge' on the door.

MardyBra · 22/02/2015 00:18

Do you have a chippy nearby? Someone once wrote the word Cunt in chips on my windscreen.

I wasn't even blocking anything.

AlpacaLypse · 22/02/2015 00:20

I have a permanent scar on my left ankle due to the (admittedly indirect) consequences of some shit head blocking my car in.

We were going to a party. Fairly good friends, and I'd promised to take an extra dozen plates and glasses to eke out their supply. Village about 5 miles away (positively neighbours in this sparsely occupied bit of the country). I got to my car, parked herringbone on an area of public parking, just like another 25 or so, and some shitehead had dumped his/her car right across the front of mine, no way out.

I called the local fuzz on 101, but there was no way anything was going to happen in a hurry and we were meant to be there in 15 minutes. So DP had to take us both and the spare plates and glasses in his Transit.

Upside - I'd been meant to be the Designated Driver that night (DP and I take strict turns), but I'm not insured for the Transit so he had to drive, which meant I got to be mildly sozzled.

Downside - our destination was up a seriously tight, narrow lane, and when I got out, my left leg sort of got stuck down between the van and the bank and I had to be hauled out physically by DP and several other guests.

It wasn't until the next day that I discovered my left shin and ankle were a mass of bruises, and one has never actually gone away, after four years.

I never did find out who the bastard was. But if I ever see him again he'll get the banana up the exhaust treatment.

passthewineplz · 22/02/2015 00:28

Would a parking post work? www.barriersdirect.co.uk/parking-posts-c1087

Original poster
SilenceInTheLibrary · 22/02/2015 00:29

Right- next time it's damp breadcrumbs. Or lipstick, or glue.

Banana up the exhaust could work too.

Dh thinks it would bring repercussions to us though...and so is v disapproving.

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AwfulBeryl · 22/02/2015 00:32

Grin Mardy, I know everyone says this but I really did wake my dp up doing a spluttery laugh at the cunt chips. Grin
Next time wipe poo on the door handles, that'll learn em.

Original poster
SilenceInTheLibrary · 22/02/2015 00:37

"cock piss partridge" definitely appeals - so be warned people! LIPSTICK ON THE WINDSCREEN NEXT TIME! And some apple peel 'cos that was fun. Or maybe potato.

I wish we could get a parking bollard, but sadly no - it just wouldn't work because of our position. English village,road layout

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Original poster
SilenceInTheLibrary · 22/02/2015 00:40

Poo on the handle. We have dogs.... mmm... could be.

Be warned you driveway blockers "just for a minute".

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AlpacaLypse · 22/02/2015 00:42

Go into pub, looking vaguely half dressed and slightly hysterical. Keep prodding barstaff, saying you're the lady from over the road, you've had a call from the hospital, you mum/gran/sister/insert relative of your choice is very sick and you need to get there RIGHT NOW.

Do it quite loudly. Keep saying 'It's a Purple RangeRover registration number XYZ 123Z' (or whatever colour/make/reg is guilty).

Be terribly sweet when the embarrassed person emerges. Just be quite loud about how much of a pain it is, as this isn't the first time you've not been able to get out when you needed to.

Then, when they've driven out of your way, go round the back, park up and come home quietly on foot.

Next day, pop in to see Landlord, tell him that thankfully sick relative is much better, and ask him to support you to see that parking in your lane is better regulated. Mention something about how you've noticed his licence is up for its annual renewal at the same time.

And now, being serious...photograph and log every single incident and talk to local police.

passthewineplz · 22/02/2015 00:48

I once put garlic salt down the pipe that comes out of ndn tumble dryer..... It stunk like a bastard. Next time someone parks there, stick some up their exhaust..... Mwhahahaha!

SistersOfPercy · 22/02/2015 00:51

I don't get the mentality of people who do this. Our street was entirely empty yesterday when next doors visitors abandoned their car over our drive half an hour before dh was due home. The woman seemed quite put out that id asked her to move it and huffed a bit as it was shifted to the other side of the still empty street.

It's just basic manners isn't it?

fizzycolagurlie · 22/02/2015 00:55

Eggs. Its a waste of good eggs of course, but they're a bugger to get off and ruin the paintwork (allegedly).

holidaysarenice · 22/02/2015 01:02

Go into he pub, loudly announce that some inconsiderate twat has parked across your drive, really lay it on thick, then read out the reg and then comment "you need to move it now as the tow truck is on the way"

Watch them go red faced and crap themselves in front of the pub.

Guarantee they won't do it again.

If they try to slide out five minutes after you've been in he pub to move it, go back in, everyone will watch, find them and loudly thank them for moving.

steff13 · 22/02/2015 03:52

Sugar in the gas tank?

NCbutIstillmightbeouted · 22/02/2015 04:17

I live opposite a hospital and now have to pay £50 for 9 nine months of parking outside my own front door.

I am not friendly anymore due to these fuck wits.

MorelliOrRanger · 22/02/2015 07:27

Yanbu, but you said your hubby parks on the road, why doesn't he park in front of the drive?

hestialou · 22/02/2015 07:47

Its illegal to park across a dropped curb, even if it is your own.

SistersOfPercy · 22/02/2015 10:36

Not quite hestialou. It's only illegal to block a car in, to 'prevent access to three highway'. If there is no car on the drive it's not illegal to park over the dropped kerb.