J'Accuse... I do not believe a sizeable minority on here when they say "I blah blah blah"

[Salmotrutta]

E.g. :-
"I cook from scratch" - I hate "from scratch". We used to say "everything was homemade".

And those of you who state "homemade potato wedges" ? ...yeah, I'm impressed. So that would be some potatoes shoved in the oven then?

What is quinoa anyway? I genuinely have no idea. Other than something seedy maybe?

Can't be that posh though cos aldi sell it at the till.

I like the sanctimonious 'We only watch 5 minutes of TV a week' posts the best.

Or the 'I have 5000 books, a house without books makes me sad' posts.

The popularity of Quinoa has meant that people from Bolivia and Peru, for whom it was once a staple part of their diet, can no longer afford to eat it.

I like to throw that one at the many quinoa bores I work with.

I am so glad you said this OP. I love some of the free therapy you get on here when you're feeling low or worried about something but sometimes there is so much smuggery and it needed saying. I find i have a love hate relationship with FB too. Why do people post a pic or a "check-in" of everywhere they go and state what a good time they're having? When i'm out with my friends or family having a good time i forget i've got a phone!! GRRRRRR!

Ever since a recent MN thread, I know cook 'from scratch' with Pink Himalayan Salt. Made from the tears of unicorns apparently. And stained with the blood of the women and children mining it it. Or summat.

I am very sanctimonious about my it

Salmotrutta, you old trout, get thee off FB. Your quality of life will improve over night

I cook from scratch whilst watching TV - guaranteed to piss off all mumsnetters in some way.

Ohh the 'if your TV is bigger than your bookcase' bollocks.

I'd fucking hope so, I have a kindle and would look a cunt if the kindle was bigger than 50".

These posts are second in sanctimony only to the 'Was this dinner of lentil and soya bean salad with quinoa, beetroot and watercress healthy, or should I try harder?' type posts.

Yes - try harder to not be so smug.

Quinoa is what alfalfa wants to be when it grows up.

I once gave my PFB quinoa baby food

We had a lovely curry tonight cooked from scratch, by our local takeaway

I am so fucked off with people posting pictures of every effing meal food on FB. Can anybody explain this phenomenon to me? I just don't understand why.

Oh, we had spag bol made from scratch by Dolmio.

I own hundreds of books, but DH's several TVs makes up for that

I remember ketchips! No other fucker does, lazy parenting from me Ma obviously....
Ketchips (chips with ketchup in the INSIDE!) and mini kievs were a Wednesday dinner iirc.

I need ketchips in my life.

Hey Salmo! Salmo! I have made sugar free muffins for a kids birthday party tomorrow. Wanna make something of it?

They have mini kievs (Bernard Matthews ones) in the freezers in the Parc Market at Center Parcs. The two things are so far removed to be linked I thought the universe would explode.

I am wetting myself reading this.

FWIW I cooked a lamb casserole from scratch today. As in - throw lamb chunks in a pot with a tiny bit of oil over a low heat, forget about for 4 hours. Blanch a load of veg, chuck in with lamb. Add in easy and good tasting things like stock (bought) red wine (not made from scratch by me, mate!), soy sauce (don't care), tomato puree (in a tube) and honey (made from scratch by bees). With mash. It was fucking delicious. And bog easy to do. And nothing to be smug about either.

I did scratch myself in the process at some point, because something itched - will that do?

I love mini kievs. All that gooey stuff oozing out.

My favourite thread was one where the OP was ripped to shreds because her DC ate Covent Garden tomato soup:

"Do you have any idea how much sugar is in pre-made tomato soup?"

Erm, nope, because I'm not a fucking loon. I'm sure no-one ever died from tomato soup overdose.

Thank you!

I was just thinking the same thoughts earlier when reading a thread where op asked what juice people gave children. The reaction was as expected. Only unicorn tears and the sweat of fairies allowed. By offering weak squash to a constipated toddler she was setting that child up for a life of obesity, toothlessness and little appreciation for akshal culture

You have to make sure you dont overcook them or they burst :(

I had a plate of dirty potato waffles tonight - best dinner ever.

We had Papa Johns tonight. While I was waiting for it, I scratched my arse. Does that count?

Quinoa isn't even pronounced quinoa, it's an imposter!

I only came on to say my dd(4) once said 'cook from scratching' and that's what I think now when I hear cook from scratch, someone scratching their arse whatever while 'slaving over the stove'.

I stopped reading the juice thread after the 100th poster said their children only drink milk or water.