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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To go away without the DC's

39 replies

Jessiepops · 20/02/2015 22:40

Hi all,
Sory for the long post but feel I need to explain the back story.
DS's (6/9) go on holiday with their grandparents every year for the last week in August, they have done this since DS1 was around 2/3 and DS2 joined in at around the same age.
They love it and are always excited about their week away with nan and grandad.
We go away early on in the year with the kids for a week and have a few weekend trips away during the year

Last year my DP and I both had holidays free for when the DS's went away, and DP suggested we take the opportunity to have a break ourselves.
He is a keen fisherman so we booked a private log cabin with private lake for the week.
He fished and I relaxed in the hot tub, no stress or day to day worries.
It really was a chilled out holiday.

This year we are going away with the kids at Easter and then again at spring bank.
As the DS's will be away with their grandparents my DP has sugested we go back to the same place again.
I'd love to and we have booked agian but have been met with a few responses like "oh,,,, going away without the kids agian,,," and "I couldn't have a holiday without the DC's being there it wouldn't be right",,, I've explained that the kids are away anyway so it's not like we are leaving them behind.

My DP and I have the odd weekend away together (birthdays mainly) but there's nothing wrong with that is there?

Surely we all deserve a break now and again?

OP posts:

TheFecklessFairy · 20/02/2015 22:42

Of course. Ignore the silly buggers - they're only jealous!

WorraLiberty · 20/02/2015 22:45

You're a terrible Mum

He's a terrible Dad

I'm calling SS

Blah, blah, blah

Etc

Redcliff · 20/02/2015 22:46

I would hop, skip and jump my way to a child free break with DP! Enjoy.

Primaryteach87 · 20/02/2015 22:48

Enjoy!!

nancy75 · 20/02/2015 22:53

You will always get people like this.

My daughter often goes to Spain with my parents, the reaction I got when she was younger you would have thought I had sent her to single handedly fight wild dogs rather than a week with totally doting grandparents being fed in posh restaurants and spoilt left right and centre!

Your kids will be away anyway - just go and have fun.

mrsfuzzy · 20/02/2015 22:59

go for it !!! you love your kids, you've got great child care, kids are happy, mum and dad are happy, grandparents are happy, what else can you say ? everyone has a great time, you all get back together after your break and it's great, after all you are still a couple not just mum and dad, you need that time together, i've no problem with people who revolve their lives around their kids but i sometimes wonder how many spouses/ partners would love the chance to take their other halves on a couple holiday, but sometimes inwardly get irritated because the kids have to go too ?

bigbluestars · 20/02/2015 23:00

I don't kmow why you are asking.

If you are happy with it then what's the problem.

It isn't what I woud do but that doesn't matter.

youngestisapyscho · 20/02/2015 23:02

I never understand people that say they couldn't go away without their kids.... How lucky you are. Enjoy!

bigbluestars · 20/02/2015 23:05

Holidays are a very precious family time for us. We like to spend holidays together.

Darkforcesatwork · 20/02/2015 23:09

Your kids are away having a great time with GPs so why not?! Are you supposed to sit at home wringing your hands, wondering whether they are coping without you and counting the days until they come home? Have fun, ignore the jealous ones!

munchkinmaster · 20/02/2015 23:12

I wouldn't feel bad.

And even if I did a hot tub and a lie in would probably sort it out.

FireflySerenity · 20/02/2015 23:12

Time off work is precious to us too so we always ensure its when we are all together. Holidays to us are family time.

PunkrockerGirl · 20/02/2015 23:19

As long as the children are happy it's fine. Enjoy yourselves and be pleased that your dc are confident enough to go away without you.

championnibbler · 20/02/2015 23:20

Enjoy.
I see nothing wrong here.

Mrsteddyruxpin · 20/02/2015 23:21

I honestly don't see this as an issue, they are with their grandparents for a week anyway. It will do your relationship good too.

DeliciousMonster · 20/02/2015 23:22

Who the hell cares what other people think? Go, relax and refresh yourselves.

AnnieMorel · 20/02/2015 23:30

The children are off having a wonderful time, so why not?

When they're a bit older you will have to take them on every single holiday/weekend/meal/pub lunch for fear of offending them (or is that just ours?).

Original poster

Jessiepops · 20/02/2015 23:35

To be honest bit didn't bother me till I mentioned it to a couple of friends and they made the comment about going away again without the kids.

We went away last September for my birthday for 2 nights but other than that we only go away if the kids are away.

OP posts:

Penguinsaresmall · 20/02/2015 23:40

Ignore and have a fab time!

We have our main 'big' holiday with the dc every summer, but also have a weekend or two away on our own - total relaxation in a way you never get when you're on holiday with children.

I always feel a bit sad for people who react with shock/horror at the idea of having to spend time with their dh without their children.

kbbeanie · 20/02/2015 23:41

Don't worry what others say, they are only jealous (i am slightly lol) go away and enjoy yourselves. The kids will have a ball and so will you :)
Tbh i wish i could do it but im one of these people that wont leave my child to go away lol. Ive never left him for a single night...and the thought of him going away for a week abroad without me makes me feel panicked..
But im just weird and if i could overcome my anxieties i'd be away for a holiday on my own with dp as well.

Penguinsaresmall · 20/02/2015 23:44

Give it a few more years beanie

sandgrown · 20/02/2015 23:49

Go and have a good time . The kids will have a ball and you can have some couple time .

Karoleann · 21/02/2015 00:16

I love going away without the DC's - I love coming back too. 5 days is plenty and they really appreciate me when I'm back and I really appreciate them too.

Becles · 21/02/2015 00:27

I was going to be deep and meaningful, but someone else came up with a better response.

Yesterday 23:12munchkinmaster

*I wouldn't feel bad.

And even if I did a hot tub and a lie in would probably sort it out.*

Stock up on some vino and ideas for hot tub fun.

NotGoingOut17 · 21/02/2015 07:32

Looking it at another way, the kids are going away without you, you are merely using the child free time wisely. Bigbluestars I understand what you are saying but the ops children aren't there to spend holiday time with anyway plus the op says they also have holidays together.

If you were leaving your children home all the time whilst you had the times of your lives my response may be different but as they are off enjoying themselves I say go for it. Tbh it sounds best all round, the break with your dh doesn't sound like one kids would generally enjoy, so it means the holidays you have together can be more child focussed. Don't feel guilty op...you are allowed a break.

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