Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Please help me

30 replies

shockedhelpmeplease · 16/02/2015 11:19

I've NC.

I have a 5 month old DC. Exclusively BF.

Haven't had sex since she was born. Over christmas, tried to gently have sex but it hurt too much so was nowhere near DTD, stopped there and then.

Not had a period since she was born. Found an old test and took it, just because it was there.

It's positive.

What the fuck do I do. I don't want another baby. I'm bf'ing my little girl and I can't express and she won't take a bottle. I can't do this. I just want to curl up in a ball and act like it's not happening but I cant. Fuck. Please help me. Anybody.

OP posts:
sparkysparkysparky · 16/02/2015 11:22

Go and see a medical professional. And take a fresh new test.

mommy2ash · 16/02/2015 11:24

surely if you havent had sex then its an impossibility to be pregnant

GreenPetal94 · 16/02/2015 11:24

Is it actually possible from the sexual activity that took place that you could be pregnant. If not then calm down.

Get a new test and check again. If you are pregnant it will be fine, your little one will be one by the time the baby comes.

Bluecarrot · 16/02/2015 11:25

I'm wondering if the levels can still be high from your last pregnancy.

You haven't had sex. You can't be pregnant.

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 16/02/2015 11:25

If you haven't had sex then you can't possibly be pregnant. Go and see your Dr.

Bluecarrot · 16/02/2015 11:25

Sorry, read as 5 week old not 5 month old.

TheWitTank · 16/02/2015 11:26

So did you actually manage penetration when you attempted sex before? It seems really very unlikely you are pregnant unless you have has sex? You haven't had any periods and you are bf?

You need to go to the doctors and get the pregnancy confirmed and have a chat through your options there. I'm so sorry you are struggling Flowers

WhoremoaneeGrainger · 16/02/2015 11:26

I dont know what to say, but didnt want to leave unanswered.

You must have actually coped with some PIV sex to be pregnant though surely? ie he must have been in you long enough for some semen or pre-ejaculate to escape into your system, and be able to mix it up with your egg to make a new baby.

But go make yourself a cup of tea, then go buy a new test (how old is old? do they have use by dates - been so long since DD i cant remember)

You need to discuss with your DH or DP what the next step will be....

Lovemycatsandkids · 16/02/2015 11:26

Go and see your doctor. You won't get any help on here that will alter that. You need to see your doctor or go to a contraception clinic.

You need help anyway love as it's not normal to not be having sex due to physical pain 5 months post baby.

Get help. Flowers

GreenPetal94 · 16/02/2015 11:27

My pal did get pregnant whilst relying on the exclusively breast feeding contraception method. Her children were 13 months apart. Both girls, they are now teens and firm friends. She even chose to have a third but admittedly a planned 3 year gap.

Original poster
shockedhelpmeplease · 16/02/2015 11:28

im sorry for tmi but he had it in me for about 5 seconds but was nowhere near climax as I made him stop because it really hurt (episiotomy).

OP posts:
WhoremoaneeGrainger · 16/02/2015 11:28

Sorry just re read my post - that sounds so horrible.

Just think you need to re-test or speak to a GP to confirm or deny the pregnancy (which does sound totally unfeasible btw).

Original poster
shockedhelpmeplease · 16/02/2015 11:30

I don't want another baby, not yet. We can't afford it, we have no room. But I can't leave my dd

OP posts:
AlpacaLypse · 16/02/2015 11:33

Go and get another test kit. They do eventually 'go off'.

Lovemycatsandkids · 16/02/2015 11:33

Either way you need help and advice going forward.

I had a huge episiotomy following forceps and you should be healed by now.

Not saying you should have sex but this shouldn't be stopping you if u want it and if sex is painful you go back to your GP.

Good luck op. Don't be scared or overwhelmed. Whatever the outcome it's your decisions and your feelings that will determine your future.

Getting help the sooner the better will reassure you or help to deal with whatever quicker and simpler.

Lovemycatsandkids · 16/02/2015 11:35

What do you mean you can't leave your dd?

Take her with you. Explain to try receptionist you need an urgent appointment.

EmmaJacksonHarley · 16/02/2015 11:36

Agree the test may have 'gone off' and it could be wrong. Get a fresh one and POAS again.

Original poster
shockedhelpmeplease · 16/02/2015 11:36

I haven't tried to have sex since then, I was 3 months PP at the time. It might be better now.

If I terminate, I can't leave my baby

OP posts:
sparkysparkysparky · 16/02/2015 11:37

Most likely explanation for test result is old testing wand and your hormone levels in my nonexpert opinion. Test again with bew wand and see a doc. However I am an expert in the pain you describe for the reasons you describe and you need to see a specialist. You will probably be fobbed off by GP or HV (whoever ). If you are feeling too rubbish to do this alone ( here I am also an expert in feeling this way at this stage ) get an advocate. Partner, family member, friend.Brew

CurlyWurlyCake · 16/02/2015 11:38

Buy a new test.

DixieNormas · 16/02/2015 11:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lovemycatsandkids · 16/02/2015 11:39

Your jumping way ahead. You need to do another test to check your facts.

Don't panic. One step at a time op.

Original poster
shockedhelpmeplease · 16/02/2015 11:39

Thank you everyone

OP posts:
RiceBurner · 16/02/2015 11:40

I had a false +ve from an old test kit. (Many years ago.) So I know it is possible to get a false +ve. Therefore, do get another test done before you panic.

BellaCB · 16/02/2015 11:40

OK. Deep breaths. This is a shock.

Get a GP appointment. In theory you can become pregnant doing what do you did, but the odds are so incredibly tiny that I'd definitely want to investigate any other reasons why there might be significant HGC in your system that could cause a positive test result.

Secondly, you need to have your episiotomy looked at to make sure it is healing well. There are lots of reasons why sex might have been painful - you might have been too tense because it was the first time, you might have thrush you didn't know about (I had that, hugely embarrassing but had no symptoms and thought it was just post-baby sex that was generally painful), but you want to make sure everything is ok.

And if you are pregnant and don't want to be, then you don't have to be.