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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

people that do an emergency stop when the lights change are dangerous and wrong

417 replies

magrate · 13/02/2015 09:02

I drive for about two hours everyday for my new job. Have to go through over 20 sets of lights. So many people think that as soon as the lights change you must stop. Aibu to expect people to still go though a second after they go red?

OP posts:
Sallyingforth · 13/02/2015 16:14

If you approach a green light, you expect that it will change to amber at any time. So you approach at a speed that will allow you to stop sensibly. There is NO NEED for "emergency braking".

TammySwanson · 13/02/2015 16:16

It is fine to brake when a light is as amber and if an accident is caused by someone doing an emergency stop then it's the fault of the person following too closely. This is the bread and butter of all those insurance scammers were someone brakes suddenly and then sues the person behind them for fake injuries and exorbitant repair costs.

ginmakesitallok · 13/02/2015 16:17

Bloody woman, if the car just glided into the back of the car in front, if it didn't cause any damage then your dp can't have been going very fast? So why didn't he just stop? There would have been no need for an emergency stop, just a normal foot on brake thing would have done it.

If a light is on amber you should be stopping already, so no need for an emergency stop. I think your understanding of an emergency stop is different to mine. Does your dp ever just stop the car?

TammySwanson · 13/02/2015 16:18

I'm not claiming that I've never followed too closely that I might have gone into the back of someone who stopped suddenly but if I do that then it is my fault. 'Two second rule', innit? (Maybe they don't teach that nowadays)

mrsminiverscharlady · 13/02/2015 16:21

Nodbody could possibly know in the few seconds (or less) that it takes to come to a halt that going into the back of the car in front won't result in damage or injuries. So either a) your husband didn't care about causing damage to somebody's car and/ or people inside it because you and your newborn baby's comfort were more important to him and so 'glided' into the car regardless or b) he misjudged how hard he needed to brake because he was driving over cautiously.

Either way it wasn't the fault of the other driver.

ThatBloodyWoman · 13/02/2015 16:26

No he wasn't going fast and no I think you're right -it wouldn't have needed an emergency stop from us -I probably was being a bit ott to say he avoided our own emergency stop by going into the back of him.
But it took me out of the blue,and I think if I had been driving it would have caused me to brake abruptly through surprise tbh.
Dh had been carefully avoiding sudden braking,if you've had a c section you'll understand,so he didn't apply the brakes as much as he might have done otherwise.Maybe over cautious,who knows...?
Anyhow,the guy had no reason to emergency brake -no animals or pedestrians were around.

laughingmyarseoff · 13/02/2015 16:26

ginmakesitallok I agree, plus the other car can't have stopped that fast either. Bloody woman, you and your DH are wrong, your DH was the daft one; you can cling on to what someone clearly said and was wrong about or you can accept your DH was too close and if in the car with him then make it clear when he gets too close again. It's likely he was having an off day himself since just giving birth and accidents happen when people drive badly and/or have off days.

And if someone emergency brakes then you have to be prepared for it, regardless of where it is. He could have easily done so if something or someone had run in front of your car. Your DH would still have 'glided' into him which means he was too close.

laughingmyarseoff · 13/02/2015 16:29

ThatBloodyWoman It took your DH by surprise, he was knackered after everything that happened and too close. Whether the guy had reason to brake doesn't matter, what matters is that your DH was distracted-taken by surprise- and it was his fault.

He probably was over cautious, when I had my appendix out my mum did some bad driving and went through a pedestrian crossing rather then emergency brake because she was going too fast.

ginmakesitallok · 13/02/2015 16:29

So, it wouldn't have required an emergency stop from dp, just him being a bit more observant?

Was it an emergency stop from the guy in front? Or did he just stop at the red light when dp expected that he would go through it?

Bakeoffcakes · 13/02/2015 16:30

It's illegal to go through a red light, so if you dont do it you're an idiot.

If someone does an emergency stop and your too close to stop yourself, then YOU are in the wrong as you were obviously too close ot them.

tiggytape · 13/02/2015 16:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tiggytape · 13/02/2015 16:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThatBloodyWoman · 13/02/2015 16:34

So,clearly it seems some think its more of a problem to kiss a cars back end causing no injuries or damage,than perform an emergency stop for no reason,since this seems to have become the focus of the thread?
Whatever anyone says I'd rather my dh was the driver to do what he did,rather than the driver who did the emergency stop.
I know who I think is the safer one,and as it is,he proved to me as such by managibg the situation presented to him and ensuring noone was injured or distressed and nothing was damaged.

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/02/2015 16:35

I've had a c-section. Your DH was either; too close; too fast; he was distracted or you were too ill to be in a car. Because that's what the law says. If you hit the car in front, you are almost always at fault. And no, the 'almost' is not this situation. It is; someone in front rolling back or reversing; someone pulling in front of you very quickly without signalling and braking (or similar).

TheRealAmandaClarke · 13/02/2015 16:39

is it ok to emergency brake on a light that has just gone from green to amber?
Well, we should be aware of the lights enough to not need an emergency stop. They dont come as a surprise. But the point of the lights is to have you stop when the light is red. And, i believe, at amber also means stop.
I wouldnt do an emergency stop as the light turns from green to amber. At least I dont think I would. I would just stop. That might be more sudden than the slowing and stopping I do when I turn into my driveway, but it doesnt make it an emergency stop.
and sometimes, becasue we are human, amd fallible, people "miss" the lights until they are close up. Then it would be better to make an emergency stop than to run the lights. The person behind also has eyes and knows that the lights are there and liable to change, so there is no excuse for them going into te back of you.
If you had been driving with your baby in the car and someone had rear-ended your car because you stopped (as required by law) at the lights, they would be in the wrong (as your DH was) and I'm guessiing you and DH would have rather different views on whose responsibility it is to not "glide" into the car in front.

TheRealAmandaClarke · 13/02/2015 16:41

With rspect thatbloodywoman youre talking nonsense.
There was no kissing.

OrangeMochaFrappucino · 13/02/2015 16:42

There are lights on a high speed road as described by the OP at a terribly complicated junction near me. Someone jumped the red light a few years ago and ploughed into the car of a young woman on her way to work. She died, aged just 22.

Now there are speed cameras on approach to stop dickheads speeding up to go through before the change and a camera on the lights to catch people going through on red. Surprise, surprise, now people face a fine they drive carefully rather than risking the lives of others.

A pedestrian crossing near me seems to attract drivers like the OP. Recently, I was crossing the road on the green man and a van chose to speed up to go through the red light. A fellow pedestrian grabbed my pram and jerked it out of the way. The van missed my baby by centimetres. He should have performed a fucking emergency stop,it's a damn sight safer than smashing into pedestrians.

I wish there were more traffic light cameras to catch people like this!

ThatBloodyWoman · 13/02/2015 16:42

I think being in the car wasn't ideal tbh.
But how else do we all get home 48 hours after emcs?

What does the law say about emergency stops for no other reason than the light having just turned from green to amber?!

tiggytape · 13/02/2015 16:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheRealAmandaClarke · 13/02/2015 16:51

I came home after 48 hrs following my cs. You gotta get home.
Amber means stop.

ThatBloodyWoman · 13/02/2015 16:52

With all due respect TheReal.

  • 'Kissing' used as I did is slang (at least for my neck of the woods) for barely having touched.

There was no actual kissing involved that I noticed though,that much is true.

TheRealAmandaClarke · 13/02/2015 16:54

Youre grappling for excuses. Look it up if you need more information.
We all make mistakes.
And driving can be a PITA sometimes.
Bit your dh was in the wrong.

I doubt anyone wants to string him up for it. It could happen to many of us. But if it did it would be our own fault.

ThatBloodyWoman · 13/02/2015 16:56

I find it bizarre that there isn't more outcry on here about a person who performs an emergency stop for absolutely no valid reason.
Surely that person isn't a safe driver to be on the roads?

TheRealAmandaClarke · 13/02/2015 16:57

I made that comment because i think youre minimising the issue..
If there wa no harm done whatsoever then what is the problem? You make it sound like the sort of impact when two cars park deliberately touching bumpers. So the car in front couldnt have done anything wrong. He stopped. Your dh stopped and "kissed" the car in front.
Your dh was at fault.

laughingmyarseoff · 13/02/2015 16:57

Yes ThatBloodyWoman, it means your DH was too close. I haven't done an emergency brake since a child and ball almost ran out in front of the car, I still wouldn't like you or your DH behind me given how you both excuse 'kissing cars'.

Your DH made a mistake, you are making one not accepting that but I don't see any point arguing with you, I just hope he doesn't get that close to anyone else in the future.