"is she good?"

[Misty9]

Question asked of my 9 month old at a family gathering recently, upon meeting her for the first time. Argh! This question gives me the rage - she's a baby! Yes, she cries sometimes, no she doesn't sleep through, she's a baby. There is no good or bad, just being.

Anyone else find this question annoying?

Maybe we should all have a list of pre-approved questions we can ask, since conversation once considered normal seems to be highly offensive to some. And it's a get a grip thing not a generation thing.

It's just something you ask to make chit chat and pretend your interested in the baby - there's not much else to discuss in regards to babies really.

Yes it's a stupid question but just smile and say "yes, she is amazing"!??

I think most people realise that 'is she a good baby' is just shorthand for 'is she colicy/waking up a lot during the night/difficult to settle' etc. It's not meant in the same way as asking if an older child is good.
People overthink things sometimes.

Amazing the things some people get offended by.

What on earth do you want them to ask you?!

I am as equally annoyed at your thoughts on this polite question as you are on the question itself!

Just say "no, I believe in original sin".

You are very annoying op. I'm glad you aren't related to me (anxiously checks no 9 month old relatives....)

It's conversation. Chill out.

YABU
summed up nicely by lucky lopaz on p1

"No, not really... she's currently planning to poison Earth's water supply"

YABU - People are trying to make conversation, no need to be so precious :(

I hated it too, can't believe so many people can't see why it's a weird thing to ask. DS slept little and cried lots so what was I meant to say? No, he's pretty shit? Being a first time Mum is a time ripe for insecurities and anxiety so why make people feel they or their children are being judged?

I used to say, "he's perfect, he doesn't sleep much though" which seemed to work as a pat answer. Although some people would really push the whole 'good' thing.

I would rather they had said, does he sleep/feed well? Or is he a happy/content baby? Those would be perfectly reasonable 'small talk' questions which don't imply a judgement on the answer.

It's just conversation like idol chit chat about the weather ! They can't exactly ask if the baby has developed any interests in politics yet !