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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

How can I stop crying.

68 replies

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 31/01/2015 19:00

Thursday night I took an overdose, as a result I have been in hospital and got discharged this morning.

From the medical side I am ok, but my MH is all over the place.

I feel really rubbish about myself, by over dosing to try and kill myself I know mad a bad situation worse. The hospital has referred me to SS and I was threatened that if I left the hospital the police would be involved.

I'm feel really down atm, I can stop crying and can't face people. I can't look at my DC or DH because I feel so guilty. They didn't desrve all of this.

I am such a crap mother and wife.

It's taken me an hour to write this so sorry if it don't make sense.

OP posts:
Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 02/02/2015 08:31

Got the appointment at 9:30.

I'm shaking and nervous

OP posts:
ohtheholidays · 02/02/2015 08:43

Have you got anyone that can go with you Piper?

Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 02/02/2015 08:56

DH was working nights last night, so he needs his sleep.

OP posts:
ohtheholidays · 02/02/2015 09:06

Could he catch up on his sleep after the appointment or maybe a trusted family member,friend or neighbor.

KnitFastDieWarm · 02/02/2015 09:13

Just wanted to offer you a virtual hand to hold - I've been there, I've got the tshirt, I know the sicky shakey GP visit feeling all too well. But it's worth it, I promise. I know it's impossible to imagine feeling better when you're in the depths of it, but you will. Be honest with your GP, don't hold back, cry if you need to - that's what they're there for.

Keep posting while you're waiting to see the doc if it helps Smile

You're not a crap mother and wife, you're ill and you're doing what you need to get well. If you had flu and needed time and help to get well again no one would think you were a crap mother and wife! Everyone gets ill from time to time and MH is just as real an illness as any physical illness. Please be kind to yourself, just keep swimming, and know you're not alone and I can promise you (as someone who could have written your opening post at some points in my life) it can and will be better.

Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 02/02/2015 09:50

Just typical running late

OP posts:
SuggestmeaUsername · 02/02/2015 10:18

We all hope your appointment goes well Piper

Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 02/02/2015 10:47

Increased my antidepressants and got sleeping tablets.

OP posts:
SuggestmeaUsername · 02/02/2015 12:07

have they offered any other support such as counselling?

Kachan · 02/02/2015 12:54

Hello Piper. Another one here who has also been where you are now. It will get better. Is the GP able to access CBT for you or are you getting some therapy via the psych unit? I was fortunate enough to get both and it really is important to have that lined up alongside the meds. I really hope you get some sleep, again another vital ingredient in finding some equilibrium. You are not a bad mother, you are unwell and there is no shame in that. Please be kind to yourself, try and replace any negative thoughts with positive ones. Next time you think to yourself that you are bad mum/wife, tell yourself that actually that's not true, you are good person with lots of love to give to your family and they love you back. Repeat it again and again.

HappyAgainOneDay · 02/02/2015 13:01

I'd be rubbish at advice so Flowers for you, OP.

Flowers Flowers Flowers

Could someone come up with a vase, please?

Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 02/02/2015 16:40

I am now on 200mg of sertraline and also 7.5mg of zimovane.

Before having the prescription the doctor phoned DH ( with my consent) to take responsibility for the medication due to the over dose.

I have a lockable medical box due to having a son who is asd and unable to understand not to touch them, so just given DH my key. ( leaving out a few sachets of calpol just incase DC need it)

He doesn't trust me around medication at the moment.

OP posts:
Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 04/02/2015 19:49

I'm still not in a good place, today I have been really low. Almost crying over nothing.

I told my works so they have put me on the less stressful wards.

OP posts:
DoJo · 04/02/2015 19:54

Oh Piper - I'm so sorry to hear that things are still so difficult for you. It sounds like you are doing all the right things, so hopefully it's just a question of giving the meds a chance to work and trying to keep things on as even a keel as possible until they do.

Unfortunately I have no real experience of your situation, so cannot offer any practical advice, but will gladly offer Flowers and a sympathetic ear if that is any help...

RaggyAnnie · 04/02/2015 20:40

I am sorry that things are tough at the moment OP and I hope the new meds help. Are you working at the moment? Would it not help to take some time off and get some strength back?

Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 05/02/2015 06:19

I love my job and I am so busy that I haven't got time to think.

OP posts:
RaggyAnnie · 06/02/2015 22:45

How are you Piper?

Original poster
PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 08/02/2015 15:24

I'm surviving day to day.

DH is being over bearing and 'forcing' me to take my medication every day.

I have another gp appointment tomorrow which DH is coming with me.

OP posts:
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