using a fork like a scoop

[itmightwork]

AIBU to not want my children to use a fork like a scoop, unless they are eating peas or a meal that doesn't require a knife and fork?

YANBU

But people have strong feeling on knives and forks!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/a2248371-Eating-with-fork-in-right-hand

YABU. Sometimes it's more irritating to see people trying to balance something scoopable on the convex surface of the tines than it is to see someone breaking the rules.

Usually I am the hardcore manners police, but I think YABU. Forks are a ridiculous and bloody annoying design IMO, I mean why push food onto the back of it etc? Scoop I say, scoop!!

YABU.

YABU who cares? When the eat at The Ritz enforce fancy table manners, when sitting in their own homes does it really matter?

There are much more important things to stress over than how they hold their forks. Just be thankful you have kids that can feed themselves.

Depends upon the age of the children. If they are very young, then to me it would be more important that they actually eat. Table Etiquette can follow along later.

When I was growing up, I was told that if you have your fork in your left hand, you keep the fork "the right way up", or convex, as Shatners says, but acceptable to scoop if you hold it in your right hand.

My Mum was an absolute stickler for table manners. I spent my very early years with severe eating disorders.

Moher This is exactly what my children argue. However, if you learn to use a fork properly in the first place there is no balancing act!! And use a scoop when necessary.

Evans I agree with your mum on this!! My children are 14 and 11 so certainly old enough to eat with table manners. I think they are being lazy! And how will they know how to eat at the Ritz if they don't learn and practice the basics at home?

Yanbu - they are your children, enforce whatever rules you see fit!

I, however, will continue scooping my cottage pie with my fork

itmightwork - which is why I specifically said "depends upon the age of your children". I agree, 11 and 14 are old enough to teach. Toddlers and primary age children, then I feel more important that they eat. My Mum enforced table etiquette from a VERY early age, rather than concentrate on me actually eating. Therefore, I had problems.

Cottage pie is on the list of items that it is ok to scoop

YANBU. At all. My children's table manners have deteriorated since eating at school (knife like a pencil, anyone?). They may use a fork in the right hand like that for a limited number of meals but the only one "allowed" to use his fork the wrong way up is the Baby, who is pretty chuffed to be scooping food into his mouth himself (and it is plastic, so much less dangerous, as well).

My husband and I differ on this. I use my fork as a scoop, he chases his peas around the plate and pushes them onto the back of the fork.

I think it is easier to eat more informally, if the company demands that, than to grapple with formal manners, if unused to them. I want my children to be acceptable companions anywhere and this is one aspect of it.

What makes scooping impolite? Seriously, it doesn't make any difference to hygiene, or how long a person's mouth is open, or how they chew. It is an efficient way to transport food from plate to mouth.

It's all these modern foods that don't lend themselves to balancing. Rice and noodle dishes weren't invented when table manners were set in stone.

Family meals here have a repetetive soundtrack from me as I am the table manners police.

'Stop scooping, you're not 2!' Is a common refrain.

knife like a pencil, anyone

YY - very annoying! If someone on TV does it, I can't concentrate on the dialogue. "Come Dine With Me" is a nightmare. All those contestants who brag about how 'posh' they are, then they can't hold their knife properly. Grrr

I'm a grown man and I use my fork as a scoop whenever I can.

Evans Sorry - I didn't mean to trivialise what you said. Of course what is eaten is important

I'm a wee bit narky when it comes to cutlery - my middle child has some brain damage that means she can't use both hands together - thus knives and forks are a minefield for her - she struggles to cut food and often uses her fingers - she's 10

so I just don't worry about correct usage - as long as they eat

it would be nice for her if it wasn't an issue and I am sure she doesn;t want to have bad manners

Shatners Are you my daughter?!

Scooping is OK with tricky food, shovelling is not.

If for any reason a child finds it difficult to use a knife and fork together that is a whole different ball game. I suspect my children were taking the easy option and shovelling!

Shovelling is common, no?

I'm slightly confused I think...what's on the unscoopable foods list???